


Metanoia

by eloquent_apollo



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: AFTG Big Bang 2020, Cop AU, Embedded Images, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Torture, M/M, Major character death - Freeform, People die but they also come back bc reincarnation, Reincarnation AU, Soulmates AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-29
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:08:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 45,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26236165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eloquent_apollo/pseuds/eloquent_apollo
Summary: Andrew and Neil are soulmates, destined to be reborn over and over again until they can be together. Their lives intertwine when they have to catch a notorious serial killer, known to the public as The Butcher. Between the stress of their jobs and their personal lives, they find comfort in each other. However, things become more complicated when Neil seems to have some secrets he isn't willing to part with....
Relationships: Allison Reynolds/Renee Walker (All For The Game), Katelyn/Aaron Minyard, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard, Nicky Hemmick/Erik Klose
Comments: 47
Kudos: 109
Collections: AFTG Big Bang 2020





	1. 1936, part one

**Author's Note:**

> First I wanted to say, this author note is really long and I'm sorry. 
> 
> Now, what I really wanted to say first is: I am super excited to post this fic. I have been working on it for a while and I am really excited to join the big bang with this! A huge thanks to [Sam!!](https://nerdzewordart.tumblr.com/)  
> who made the amazing art for this fic, I am so in love with it!! It's gorgeous!! I will put it in the fic with the scenes the art was based off (and once it is up, I will also link it back here in the author note)
> 
> A lot of the background characters their names are based off of that on some of my close friends who encouraged me and hyped me up to finish this fic. Thank you to Azu, Alina, Tyla, Meg, Amy, Jess, Niko and Livvy for cheering me on, and of course a huge thank you to Jill, who helped me with her knowledge of the medical examiner and police field.
> 
> And last, a huge thank you to my beta's Emma and "Benbel". You two are the best beta's and best friends I could ask for. You put a lot of work into fixing my horrible grammatical mistakes and making this fic just that much better. Sorry for constantly using the wrong form of let's.
> 
> Okay end of the sappiness and onto the fic!

No one really knew how it started, it was as if every human on earth collectively spilled black ink on their skin. They went to bed and woke up to black spots in the shapes of fingers, hands, shoes or canes on their body. No one understood what they were, or how they got them. It would take them another few weeks to figure out it was the mark of their soulmate. When your soulmate touched the mark, the black spot would burst with colour. The type of colours that were mesmerising, the brightest of yellows and the deepest of reds. The blues deeper than the sky, and the greens darker than that of the grass and the leaves.

Andrew couldn't care less for it. His soulmate’s touch was on his left wrist, a small hand print that seemed to clutch to him as if Andrew could hold them up and protect them from harm. He really didn't care for it. He didn't want to find his soulmate, he doubted he ever would. He didn't like being touched, he didn't want to marry a woman either, so to him the whole “soulmates” craze was useless. All he had to do was wait for it to die down so he could continue on his usual way. Everyone he knew, however, refused to do just that. 

Talk about the soulmate mark went on for weeks, even when Andrew went to work, there were people talking about their soulmate marks. Married couples had broken up over it. By this point, people had even started noticing the fortunate ones who seemed to have no marks at all. Andrew tuned their talk out and instead focused on his paperwork. 

He had gone to law school and had initially come to the small precinct to work as a lawyer, but he soon found the people he worked with were hardly competent enough to do their work. Andrew would notice small details that the other officers wouldn’t, and 3 months into his career as a lawyer Wymack started insisting he came with him to crime scenes. When he realised Andrew would make a viable asset to their team as an officer he offered to hire him on the team as a cop instead. Andrew, who cared very little for being a lawyer in the first place, accepted and became a police officer. He enjoyed the investigations and his eye for small details and ability to remember even the tiniest of them made him a valued member of the team like Wymack had expected.

In five years Andrew had been promoted to the rank of detective, making him one of the youngest detectives on the team at the young age of 27. Not that he cared much. He didn’t like his co-workers and they were very much aware of this fact. The only people he allowed to bother him at work were Renee Walker and Kevin Day, but to those that asked he claimed it was only because Kevin was the boss’s son, and offending him was a bad idea. It definitely wasn’t because he was starting to form some sort of friendship with him at all. Andrew only cared about closing his cases and getting his work done, not about making friends. Renee was the exception, because he had known her from his time in the foster system back when she was still Natalie. He was just about to sign off on one case that he had handled a week ago, when his boss, David Wymack, dropped a file down onto his desk.

“No,” Andrew said, without looking at it. This was a common game they played. Andrew would refuse a case, based on the fact that it wasn’t interesting enough to care about, and Wymack would ignore everything he had to say about it and hand it to him anyway. He was annoying like that.

“It’s a shared case,” Wymack continued, as if he hadn’t even heard Andrew protest. “An unsolved murder case of ours seems to share a lot of details with those of a series of murders from Charleston. They are sending their lead detective to work with you. Try not to have him running home in tears, yeah?”

Andrew said nothing, but he accepted the file and opened it. His eyes scanned over the information. He remembered this murder case, it hadn’t been his to solve despite the fact that he had been one of the detectives on the scene, but apparently Wymack changed his mind. Most of the information he already knew, courtesy of the officers speaking about their cases during their shared lunches. The information that really interested him, was the one that was compiled by the officers from the next town over. The murders that they presented were very similar, but just like their own cases, there was very little evidence. A set of fingerprints from the culprit maybe, but it was useless to work with when they had no leading suspect to compare the prints with. There were no witnesses, as the murders had happened at night and most of the victims were people they assumed were already part of criminal organisations anyway and were therefore living in secluded areas. It seemed like they were handling a clean out of staff rather than simple murders, but that made their own case so strange. The M.O. was the same, the victims were tortured with knives first and then hung from the stairs. There would always be initials carved into the body, TB, the initials of the killer no doubt. Only Andrew’s case stood out compared to the ones from the town over. His victim had the initials carved in, sure, but she was not hung, or tortured. She had been cut into pieces, every little piece had the initials TB carved into them and a meat cleaver had been left behind on the scene. Either Andrew was dealing with a copycat, or TB was getting more violent. The victim from his town also seemed to have no history with the crime world for as far as Andrew could find, There was hardly anything they could find on her, the cops didn’t even have a name. All they knew was that she had recently moved in and hardly spoke to her neighbours. It was a toss up on whether she was hiding from someone or she had accidentally angered TB without even realising. It would fit the pattern of the revenge killing theory the precinct at Charleston seemed to believe, so he'd have to discuss it with the other officer. His name was signed on the paper in neat cursive handwriting. The other detective was called Neil Josten, but Andrew found it hard to tell whether he was a rookie or not. All his work was properly signed, but the strokes were quick and messy. Andrew would have to meet him first, but if he didn’t try to organise his work better Andrew wasn’t interested in helping him.

“When is he coming in?” Andrew looked up to meet Wymack’s eyes again.

“Tomorrow. He couldn’t make it any faster, he had some business to take care of.”

Andrew hummed and continued reading the file. There wasn’t anything interesting in it anymore. He had found what he wanted, all he had to do now was wait for Neil Josten to show up.

-

He showed up the following day, 2 hours late, leaving Andrew to do his paperwork in the meantime. When Josten showed up, the office temporarily went silent. Andrew refused to look up to see why, until Josten stopped at his desk.

“Andrew J. Minyard?” Neil asked him.

Andrew rewarded him with a hum of confirmation and no more, still refusing to look up and meet his eyes. Neil Josten may be the most talented detective they have in Charleston, but that doesn’t mean Andrew is about to treat him as a celebrity. It isn’t until he finishes his paperwork 30 minutes later that he finally looks up into Neil Josten's eyes. His gaze is piercing, as if he is trying to read who Andrew is and discover his deepest secrets. Andrew can only wish him luck with that, he had shut that part of him down years ago. There is nothing left in Andrew Minyard except a deep disinterest for the daily happenings of his life and his fear of heights. He only allows himself a few seconds to take in Neil's appearance, until he returned his attention to his already finished paperwork. Neil Josten seems interesting. He’s a bit taller than Andrew, with red hair and startling icy blue eyes, but Andrew doubts he can keep his attention for very long. No one has been able to keep it for longer than a week or two before inevitably getting boring just like everything else in his life. So far Roland was the one who kept it the longest with a startling two weeks and one day, then he crossed the line of no touching and Andrew hadn’t spoken to him since apart from ordering his drinks at the bar.

“If you are done with your paperwork, perhaps we could go over our cases together,” Neil suggested, seemingly getting impatient from being asked to wait. Andrew didn’t answer right away, instead he read through the file of a recently closed murder one more time. When he closed it, he turned his eyes back to Neil and gestured at him to grab his own files. Neil held up his case a little, to show that he was carrying them with him. They got together in a small meeting room and laid their own files down.

“Before we start, I think it’ll be a good idea to go over our files and see if we have the same names down. Things can get lost when we transport our files, so it’s important we have them all.”

Andrew only nods and waits for Neil to start listing his victims down.

“Ryan Gonzales, one of ours. Abigail Wilson, one of ours. Amy Rodriquez, one of ours. Ash Summers, one of ours. Mike Peterson, one of ours. Shane García, one of ours. Felix Powell, one of ours. Mystery woman, one of yours,” Neil lists the names of the victims, then looks at Andrew for confirmation. Andrew simply nods, not having anything to add to it. If Neil did his research he knows the mystery woman doesn’t fit the pattern of TB's previous murders based on the fact that she seems to have no criminal connections. Neil shuffles through the pages of files, laying some out side by side while Andrew watches. It looks like Neil is just randomly laying them out at first, but then Andrew's eye catches onto a tiny detail. The files include information about the victims’ life in the crime world. Neil is laying them out by occupation. Abigail and Amy, the only two female victims, were both lookouts for what Andrew can only assume was a rival gang to TB’s. Not only that, they worked together, which became apparent because they were often detained at weapon deals gone wrong before. Apparently Neil's city didn’t have enough evidence to actually jail them, as they were only ever simply there, but they were present nonetheless. Shane and Ryan, seemed to have both been previously jailed for tax evasion. According to their files, they were apparently high up the chain in their work field. The higher they were, the harder they were to catch. The fact that they had been caught for tax evasion was probably the only thing they were ever to be jailed over. While Neil laid his cases out, Andrew eyed the victims’ photographs, studying their faces from when they were still alive compared to their corpses hung from their own stairs. The pictures were hardly gory, but the mystery woman file wasn’t there yet. Andrew remembered stepping foot on the crime scene the first time, how the overwhelming smell of sulfur and decay had made the hairs on his arms stand. The walls were red with splatters of blood, and the floor hadn’t been cleaned either. It was impossible not to step in it if you wanted to get close to the pieces of the woman’s corpse. They had been piled up, but her head was still missing to this day. Andrew and the other officers tried not to think about what TB was doing with it, but Andrew assumed it was kept as a trophy of some sorts. Andrew had been the first detective to step into the puddle of blood after ensuring samples and photographs had been taken. From up close the corpse smelled even worse, the scent was an attack on Andrew’s senses. He had to resist the urge to reach out and squeeze one of the pieces to see if there was even any blood left in it. Instead, he had turned to Wymack and had asked for the victims name, but Wymack hadn’t been able to give him one. Mystery woman, they called her, not even a Jane Doe anymore.

He gave his file to Neil, who looked through it with the same calmness one would check out the menu. The pictures were on the last page and when Neil came across them Andrew studied his reaction. He couldn’t help but to think that Neil had seen worse. He didn’t want to think about what worse could be, but it was hard not to. Neil only hummed and closed the file, placing it below the others in the middle.

“Mystery woman. Where does she go?” Neil looked at him, but Andrew knew it wasn’t a question that Neil expected an answer to, so he simply stared at him until Neil himself shrugged.

“Can I go to see the crime scene?” he asked instead.

“It’s been cleaned.”

“That's fine,” Neil assured.

Andrew got up and grabbed his files, feeling like this was useless time wasted on formalities and checking if they were up to date. He didn’t know why Neil would even want to see the crime scene anyway, Andrew had ordered extra pictures to be taken of everything that caught his eyes before even stepping further into the rooms. Everything was clean now anyway, so it wasn’t very interesting to see. The place was still closed off, of course, so others couldn’t go in and disturb it. There was a police car patrolling the victims’ house all day and all night. If it was truly TB they were dealing with, which was very likely, and the theory that she had been caught up in illegal activities was true, mystery woman would have a thing or two worth hiding from authorities. Andrew and the other officers on the case weren’t interested in people coming in and disturbing their evidence, especially people who wanted this case to go unsolved. Andrew took Neil to his car and held open the door for him. Neil gave him a polite smile and Andrew climbed into the driver seat. The drive was spent in relatively comfortable silence, until Neil twisted in his seat to stare at Andrew.

“This woman, mystery woman, why do you call her that? Why not just Jane Doe? Even her file was filed as mystery woman?”

“She was hardly a human when we found her.”

Neil waited for a further explanation, then frowned when he realised he wasn’t getting one. It was Kevin who refused to file her as that, Jane Doe was too personal for something that was essentially a pile of organs and meat. Wymack had only briefly argued with him about it, then finally gave his son permission to file her that way anyway. It was not up to code and truthfully even Andrew found it a little bit offensive, but he also couldn’t care less so he signed off on the document.

“Is it true you were actually a lawyer before working here? It’s usually the officer that becomes a lawyer, rather than the other way around.”

Andrew frowned. Neil clearly didn’t get the hint that Andrew wasn’t interested in talking with him. He decided to humour him, though, because it was a good chance to learn more about Neil A. Josten

“Yes, I went through an accelerated study and became a lawyer for the precinct at 21. Wymack made me an officer at 22, and I became a detective a few months back. You?”

“Joined the academy when I was 19, became a detective a year ago,” Neil responds with a slight smile. “So, detective-wise you’re quite the rookie, huh?” Neil teased.

With that, Andrew decided he didn’t care for talking anymore and put the radio on louder than necessary. Neil accepted it for what it was and gazed out the window instead, while Andrew tried to ignore the strange feeling in his chest.

When they arrived, Renee Walker was waiting for them. It was policy for more than two detectives to always be present at a crime scene, but Andrew couldn’t stand most of his co-workers and only allowed Renee to accompany him. This meant he broke the rules quite often though. Occasionally he would agree to let Kevin come with him, but Kevin was the boss’s son and he was annoying to deal with for longer than 10 minutes if no alcohol was involved. Neil eyed Renee suspiciously when she offered him a hand, but Andrew didn’t stick around to see if they would have some idle chit-chat. He walked straight to the front door and unlocked it. Even after a thorough deep cleaning, the house still smelled of decay. Andrew remembered exactly where each blood stain had been as he walked through the long hallway leading to the living room. He put on his gloves before gently tracing the walls. It wasn’t until he heard footsteps behind him catching up to him that he actually proceeded into the living room.

“Is this where she died?” Neil asked

“No, we just sawed out a piece of the floor for fun,” Andrew said, before squatting next to the hole in the floor. “There was so much blood that had seeped into the floor, the only way we could fix it was by cutting it out. Lucky for us the floor was made of wood.”

Neil hummed in response and stood next to him. Renee was leaning against the doorway, not interfering with Andrew's process. It was one of the reasons Andrew accepted having her around. Unlike Kevin, Renee understood that Andrew preferred working alone like this. He could see better when he was left alone, without annoying questions from his co-workers. Neil didn’t ask much, but Andrew could tell he wasn’t watching the floor like Andrew was. His eyes were fixated on Andrew.

“Stop staring.”

“Sorry.”

Neil turned and surveyed the room by himself, letting Andrew indulge in silence as he got up from the floor and once again inspected the drawers. He knew better than to expect to find something there, he had checked before. There were no secret compartments, or secret doors or anything worth wasting his time to come here a second time. Still, he couldn’t let Neil go alone. He turned around to watch Neil move through the house, checking garbage bins for papers or anything that could identify their mystery woman. When he couldn’t find anything, he turned to face Andrew and Renee again.

“Have you talked to the neighbours yet?” He asked

“We have. They said they only saw her three times before. She never introduced herself, or gave anyone any idea into what she was up to. Apparently she lived here for 6 weeks, but never came out of the house. This likely meant she went out of her way to not be seen whenever she did leave the premise,” Renee explained with a polite smile.

Neil only hummed, like he had been expecting it. He left the living room and walked back into the hallway to find the stairs to reach the second floor. Andrew quietly trudged after him, his hands buried in the pockets of his black trench coat. It had been a gift from his cousin Nicky, but technically it was too long for Andrew. It almost came down to his ankles, only adding to the illusion of how short he was. He wouldn’t ever tell Nicky he liked the coat. If he did, Nicky would get the ridiculous idea that he could keep buying him more and more gifts.

Neil entered one of the bedrooms. It only took him a quick glance to decide the room wasn’t worht his time and moving on to the next. Andrew didn’t know what he was looking for, because the bedrooms looked identical to him. There was no furniture in any of them and when they asked the neighbours, they said they never saw a light on upstairs. Apparently, mystery woman only lived downstairs. Andrew had a theory that the mystery woman knew who TB was, found out he was a murderer and went into hiding in the small house to escape his violence. He had no evidence to confirm his theory though, but it was the department’s leading theory for now and they were still working to find any proof to confirm it. Neil stopped at the third bedroom and actually entered this time, apparently having found what he was looking for. He walked to the window and felt under the window sill, then pushed it up. He reached in and pulled out wads of cash and a piece of paper that seemed to be filled with random numbers that Andrew could only assume was coded phone numbers.

“Experiences with runners?” Andrew asked. Neil tensed up ever so slightly, it was barely noticeable. Andrew still caught it though. He raised his eyebrow and made a mental note to find out what that was about. When Neil seemed to relax, he turned around and gave a slight nod.

“All of TB's previous victims were people with things to hide. You start to find out where the best hiding spots are.” He stepped aside to let Renee take pictures of the window sill and of everything Neil had found in it. After she was done Neil passed it to Andrew to take a look. He held it so Neil could look with him since he barely got a chance to do so, but Neil simply went on to explore the rest of the room. Andrew made a mental note to add that to his list of things that didn’t add up about Neil, before looking through the wads of cash and the notes. He would have to give it to someone to decipher it, because it made no sense to him this way. He had hoped the note might include more information into who Mystery Woman was, but the numbers gave no secrets away. Andrew put it in a plastic bag that Renee had gone to get him and labeled it appropriately for the case. He checked the walls for more hollow spots and was rewarded with finding one near one of the corners. It shouldn’t have been hollow, so Andrew knew it acted as a hiding spot for important documents.

“It’s hollow,” He announced to them before kicking the wall in. It took him two tries, whatever was covering the wall wasn’t meant to be strong enough to withstand too much force, just enough that it wouldn’t immediately fall away. The hollow spot was small enough that Andrew couldn’t see what he was looking for, he just stuck his arm in and was met with a white hot pain shooting up his arm. He gave an experimental tug to free himself, but he felt the knife that was stuck in his arm refusing to give way.

“There’s a knife stuck in my arm. Whatever was in here, mystery woman didn’t want anyone to find.”

Neil came closer and knocked around the wall, trying to find another hollow spot he could break down to free Andrew. “How deep is it?” he asked

“Not that deep. I can feel the back of the other wall”

Neil hummed. “Call someone to free him,” he said to Renee, who nodded and left to call Wymack and explain what happened.

“Your arm is thin enough to go under mine, isn’t it?” Andrew asked. The pain was only there when he moved too much, so he tried to sit as still as possible. He still had to twist to properly see Neil though, and he felt the knife twist deeper into his arm at the slight movement he made. Neil, always a man of many words, only nodded.

“Then what are you standing around for? Grab it. This is probably the only trap she put up.”

Neil frowned, but approached. He looked into the hole Andrew had made and began to pull parts of the wall away so he would have more space to move. He shined with a torch to check for additional knives, then slowly reached in, trying to keep away from touching Andrew.

“You sure about this? I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Just fucking grab it.”

That was enough for Neil to continue and without bumping into Andrew, he managed to get the little plastic bag out. Andrew only briefly got time to look at it, but it was short enough for him to know it was an ID. Whether it was a real one or not would be up for the other detectives to find out, but it was the closest they had gotten to identifying their mystery woman ever. It wasn’t worth getting impaled for though, at least not to Andrew.

It took about half an hour for the people that had to cut Andrew free to actually show up, but when they did it only took a little while to actually free him. The knife was deeper than he had expected it to be, but it was small enough that it hadn’t gone completely through his arm. He would have to get it stitched up at the hospital, but he would be back to work soon. He could expect a scolding from Wymack, though. Renee offered to accompany him to the hospital, but Andrew declined and went alone. He wasn’t a child, he could get his stitches done without someone holding his hand for him.

The ambulance ride was a quiet one, because Andrew refused to make small talk with the paramedics. It only took them three glares as responses to understand that Andrew was fine with spending the 10 minute ride in absolute silence. They dropped him off and he was taken to one of the rooms where a nurse stitched his arm up for him. She didn’t bother to make small talk and just told him what he needed to know to keep his wound clean and when he was expected to come back to take the stitches out. Andrew was half tempted to say this wasn’t his first time getting stabbed, but he decided to spare himself the headache of explaining how and why he got stabbed before. This woman wasn’t worth the trouble. He didn’t bother to thank her and just got up and left the room. The moment he left, he saw the familiar bright red hair that belonged to none other than his new coworker Neil Josten.

“What are you doing here?” He asked.

Neil’s only response was to toss Andrew his car keys, which he caught with his very recently stitched up arm. The anesthesia could only numb the pain so much, he still felt a dull throbbing in his arm. He would have to be careful not to let Wymack catch onto his pain or he could expect to be forced to rest for the next few days. He inspected the keys to confirm that they were indeed his, then he turned without a word and walked away from Neil, who, of course, followed him to his car. He got into the car with Andrew, who drove off without a single word. Neil didn’t bother to give directions, so Andrew began to drive him to the police department instead. It was hardly a detour, since he lived nearby. Neil got out, but gestured at Andrew to follow him inside. Andrew only raised an eyebrow at him, but Neil didn’t explain, only gestured again.

“What?” Andrew asked annoyed.

“Wymack needs to speak with us.”

Andrew killed the car engine and got out, following Neil to Wymack’s office. Wymack greeted them with a nod, as he was on the phone. He gestured for them to sit, but Andrew leaned against the door and crossed his arms, resting his bad arm on top of the other. Neil obediently sat down on one of the chairs and quietly waited for Wymack to finish his phone call. From what Andrew could tell, it was to forensics, letting them know new evidence was coming their way. When Wymack was finally allowed to hang up, he pushed a piece of paper towards Neil. Neil inspected it and Andrew saw the tense set returning to his shoulder. The fact that Wymack raised his eyebrow proved he saw it too.

“I don’t know what this is,” Neil said

“Mystery woman's name just happens to be Emelia Josten and this means nothing to you, Detective Josten?” Wymack asked. There was no accusation in his voice, but Neil still flinched slightly.

“Josten is a common last name. If she was hiding from TB, it would be a good last name to use. I promise I don't know this woman,” Neil said. There was a lie hidden in there. Josten wasn’t a common last name at all.

Andrew finally pushed himself off the door he was leaning against and crossed to the desk. He took up the picture of the ID and inspected it. The woman didn’t look like Neil one bit, he searched for similarities but found none except for their darker skin tone. He put it back down and simply shook his head, which for Wymack was enough. He placed the picture back in the file and turned his attention back to Neil. He only stared at him for a little while, just to see if he would crack and spill another truth, but Neil's shock had already disappeared. He looked calm and collected again and the look in his eyes was a fierce one, but not one of a liar. Andrew still didn’t trust him, but he didn’t think Neil would ruin their investigation. If it meant vouching for Neil to keep him around long enough for him to figure out who he really was, then so be it.

“Fine. If I find out you're lying,” Wymack didn’t finish his sentence, the implied threat clear enough to not have to be voiced out loud. Neil only nodded, apparently not feeling the need to voice anything else either. Andrew was starting to suspect Neil had done this spiel countless of times. Lie, pretend you don’t know, run when people get onto him. Andrew was going to have to take a look into his file if he wanted to know who Neil truly was, but he wasn’t sure he could get access to the necessary information from where he was right now. Perhaps Allison, one of their lawyers would be able to find what he needed. Sadly Allison didn’t do work like that for free.

“One more thing,” Wymack said as Andrew turned to leave. “The hotel we wanted to put Neil in has been busted for doing underground drugs dealing. We can’t put him anywhere else, so we were hoping you could take him in?”

Andrew stopped, turned, and glared at Wymack. “Josten, out.”

Neil didn’t have to be told twice and immediately left the room to give them time to talk.

“Why me?”

“You live closest to the office. Besides, detective Gordon isn’t very fond of strangers. I know,” he said before Andrew could even mention that Andrew wasn’t fond of them either. “Neither are you. However, you're not prone to starting fights with them. Seth on the other hand, is. Look, if you really refuse to house him I’ll try Allison or me, but you're closer and he can catch a ride with you everytime he needs to get to work.”

Andrew should protest, but it was also the perfect opportunity to find out more about Neil. He would have to work harder to make sure he wouldn’t find out about him digging into Neil's past, but it would probably be worth it if it meant he could investigate his life by having him around.

“Fine.”

Wymack hummed in gratitude, but Andrew left before he got the chance to be annoying and ask him for anything else. He didn’t say a word to Neil, but he followed him either way as if he already knew Andrew had relented into letting him stay. He got his luggage which he had kept in a storage room for the day and put it in Andrew's car, before climbing into the seat next to him.

“Thank you for letting me stay,” Neil said with a slight smile.

“Shut up. I don’t care about you one bit.”

Andrew turned on the engine, put on his radio loud enough to drown out any noise Neil could potentially make and drove them home.

Andrew lived in a modest apartment overlooking the city, just high enough that his fear of heights didn’t interfere too much with his living. Sometimes though, when he smoked cigarettes, he would go to the roof just to feel that pang of fear. It was good to know he was still capable of feeling anything. He had a spare room that he pointed out to Neil, who seemed preoccupied with petting his cat.

“His name is Sir Fat Cat McCatterson. No, I did not come up with it,” Andrew said boredly.

Neil chuckled as he stood up and gave Andrew an amused smile. For a second, Andrew thought he felt something, but he pushed it down as soon as it came up. Neil wasn’t worth his time and he was no more interesting than the other guys he had previously fooled around with. To distract himself from the thought, he once again pointed at his spare bedroom down the hall. “Try not to make too much of a mess.” With those parting words Andrew went to the kitchen to find food for Sir, who loudly meowed as if he hadn’t been fed in the past month. He wrapped himself around Andrew's ankles, purring happily as he watched Andrew put his favourite dinner in his bowl. He didn’t give it to Sir too often, he didn’t want him getting the idea that Andrew liked him too much. He squatted down next to Sir and gave him his bowl, gently scratching him behind his ear as Sir once again meowed loudly. He had a loud bastard of a cat, but he did love having him around. Not that he would ever tell that to anyone, that was no one’s business frankly. He got back up again, grabbing pots and pans to start on dinner for the night. He didn’t have enough ingredients in the house to make anything but pasta for him and Neil.

“Any allergies?” he called out

“No.” Neil’s response came from closer than he had expected. He refused to look startled and give Neil the satisfaction, so instead he spent a few minutes on finding the right lid before turning around to find Neil leaning against the doorway. He hadn’t heard him make his way to the kitchen. How long had he even been standing there? Neil's face betrayed nothing, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes that gave Andrew the feeling he had seen him with Sir. Stupid. Allowing a moment of weakness like that was stupid of Andrew. He said nothing to Neil and turned back to the counter, looking for the tiny jar of pesto in his overhead cupboards. He checked the date and found it was good until tomorrow, so he might as well use it all. He had fresh spinach in the fridge he could use and just barely enough chicken for two.He did have more than enough pasta for the two of them. When he first moved in there, Nicky had bought him a few bags of pasta because it was easy to make. Andrew hadn’t thanked him, but now he was kind of thankful for having so much. He was exploring different pasta recipes, and with everything else he silently enjoyed, he would never admit it out loud, not even to Nicky. Only Renee knew of his secret joy in making pasta and had promised to take him to a class to learn how to make homemade pasta one of these days.

Now that he was aware of Neil behind him, he could feel his eyes burning on his back as he watched him cook their dinner. It only took the few minutes he spent on cutting the chicken for Neil to approach and stand by his side and watch him cook it in the pan.

“Make yourself useful and wash the spinach, if you insist on staying here,” Andrew said.

Neil gave him an amused smirk, which Andrew decided to completely ignore in favour of cutting into his chicken a bit more aggressively than before. Neil moved to wash the spinach in the sink while Andrew grabbed spices for the chicken. Technically the pesto gave enough flavour that the spices were unnecessary, but Andrew still preferred using them. He assumed it was a result of living with Nicky, who used spices to season everything he made and who had also taught him how to do most of his cooking. He had never expected cooking to be so relaxing, but when Nicky wasn’t hovering over him loudly chattering away about gossip that Andrew couldn’t care less about he found it was quite relaxing. It helped that Neil seemed content on staying quiet this time. He put warm water on the pit and while waiting for it to boil, he finished cutting the chicken. He felt Neil’s eyes on his hands as he put the knife away. It was different from the curious eyes that had been on him earlier as he rummaged through his cabinets. He put it away in his mental folder of things that didn’t add up about Neil A. Josten, and checked on the water. It was boiling by now, so he momentarily left the chicken alone to pour some pasta in, already knowing how much he needed for two. He grabbed the spices for his chicken and when he was finished he tossed it all in the other pan to cook.

“Give me the Spinach,” he said after a few minutes. Neil obeyed and watched as he tossed it in.

“Won’t that be too much?” Neil asked, a sliver of curiosity tainting his voice.

“Spinach shrinks,” Was all Andrew had to say in response to that. If this guy didn’t know the basics of cooking, well, he would just have to cook for him the entire time he was here then. He wasn’t going to survive on stale bread just because Josten burned his food. “Can you even cook?”

“A little.”

“A little?”

Neil shrugged. “No one ever taught me. Could you?”

Andrew shrugged and left it at that. When dinner was done he gave Neil a plate and then went to the couch to sit and eat. He flipped through the newspaper from the other day, always finding himself one behind due to his busy workload and short attention span. The news of Mystery woman was starting to get picked up more and more by bigger newspapers, meaning it was finally in the one Andrew usually read. There was of course nothing in the newspaper he didn’t already know, but he read it anyway to keep himself busy. Neil joined him after a few minutes on the couch, but kept a respectable enough distance that Andrew didn’t bother to tell him off.

“You can eat, you know,” Andrew said, while keeping his eyes on the newspaper. He felt Neil shift next to him in surprise.

“Yeah, sorry, I just… Why did you vouch for me? Back with Mr. Wymack?”

Andrew put his newspaper down, giving Neil a boring and impassive stare before sighing. He should have expected this, Neil didn’t seem like the type of person to take kindness for granted, even if this was no example of it, but the exact opposite. It was easy to confuse the two, though. Andrew would know. Too many foster parents disguising their ill wishes as an act of goodwill had taught Andrew everything he needed to know before he turned 10.

“I don’t trust you. You clearly have something to hide, but I don’t believe they’ll interfere with our investigations. As long as you can keep your issues separated from work, I’ll vouch to keep you there. You’re a less annoying coworker compared to some of the other fools I work with.”

“But you'll still try to uncover my truths?”

Andrew shrugged. “Haven’t decided.”

Neil smiled slightly. “Well, when you do figure it out maybe let me know?”

Andrew raised an eyebrow, kind of taken aback by Neil's comment. He had expected him to get mad perhaps, maybe even tell him to keep out of his business, but not to willingly agree to let Andrew figure him out. He would have left it at that, had he not caught onto Neil’s sudden switch in behaviour. They were small things, almost small enough to not be noticed, but Andrew was known for his attention to even the smallest details. Neil was pushing his food around with his fork, while his eyes occasionally darted to the exits of the room and windows when he assumed Andrew wasn’t watching. Perhaps he wasn’t as willing to let his secrets be stripped bare as he had pretended to be. Andrew watched him out of the corner of his eyes for a short while until he got bored of it and continued reading his newspaper. No doubt Neil would try harder to hide his secrets now, but Andrew wasn’t a great detective for no reason. For now, that would just have to be enough.

Andrew cut the night short at around 9, deciding he couldn’t deal with Neil's annoying behaviour for any longer. He went to bed and only let the door open long enough for Sir to decide on if he wanted to sleep in his room tonight or not. The answer was, as it mostly was these days, yes. Sir happily made himself at home at the foot end of Andrew's bed, though no doubt he would crawl closer when he suspected Andrew was asleep. It was a familiar enough show that Andrew hardly woke at the feeling of Sir planting himself firmly on his chest. It was familiar enough that, when he did wake up, he didn’t panic anymore and instead ran his fingers through soft fur before falling asleep again. If Betsy saw him like that she would say she was proud of how far he had come, but sadly Betsy had to move around a year ago, and the contact had watered down slightly. They still send letters to keep up to date, but it was harder now that Andrew was an adult that worked full-time, rather than a teenager under his cousin’s care. Betsy had been the one that had helped mend his relationship with Aaron, for which he couldn’t even pretend to not be grateful. Figuring out how to deal with Aaron had been hard, but the effort had been worth it. They still didn’t act the way two normal brothers would, but they had steady contact and Aaron had even invited Andrew to his wedding with his soulmate Katelyn. He didn’t like her one bit, but for once the promise of a soulmate had seemed to be worth it. When the marks first appeared, Aaron had written to Andrew that Katelyn and Aaron refused to touch the marks. The fear of them not being each other’s soulmate had been too high, until finally, although more out of annoyance of the frequent mention of Katelyn, Andrew had written the following back.

“To Aaron, (he still didn’t like the use of dear, even if Nicky and Aaron used it in their letters all the time)

If Katelyn isn’t your soulmate, would it truly change the nature of your relationship. What is there to fear? Would you love her less? Or do you fear she would love  _ you  _ less? I don’t think the whole soulmate thing is as important as people make it out to be. Before this we didn’t know who our soulmates were but we were still happy with one another, weren’t we? Just try it. I don’t think you would lose anything, but rather you would gain the knowledge that, despite not being soulmates, your love is still strong.

-Andrew”

He had the letter memorised, even if he didn’t want to. He couldn’t deny that when the letter confirming they were soulmates had come to him, he had felt a sliver of joy for his brother. Maybe he didn’t like Katelyn as much as you were supposed to like your brother’s fiancé, but at least she was making him happy and he cared about that. Aaron and him had come a long way since their first meeting, for which Andrew was grateful. He would never admit it out loud to anyone, not even Aaron, but having a brother by your side after years of being alone had been a nice change of pace. The first year Aaron had barely wanted to look at Andrew, knowing that he had killed their mother, but now they were past that. Their relationship had been mended. Aaron knew better than to ask Andrew about his soulmate, had read the countless letters about Andrew’s dislike of the soulmate mark, but a day ago he had still asked him about it.

“Dear Andrew,

I’m happy to say both Katelyn and I are doing well again, after having the common flu. Katelyn was more down than I was, but I took good care and made sure she recovered fast. While Katelyn and I were sick at home, we ended up talking about you. I know you don’t like it when we do that, but I guess it was bound to happen one of these days. Katelyn wondered where your initial disgust of the soulmate mark came from, but I didn’t tell her about  _ him  _ just like how you never told her what I did to him. Don’t take offence to this, but you pushed me so I feel I am allowed to push you back. Why do you worry over it so much? A soulmate is someone who is meant to be with us, someone who should love us and keep us safe no matter our past. If anything, the mark should at least prove there is someone out there capable of loving and trusting you. A soulmate is someone you can trust. You’ll know it’s them because being with them will feel right from the moment you meet them. It was the same for Katelyn and I, we were drawn to each other from the first moment we met.

I hope, sincerely, that whoever it may be will be right for you. I don’t think you have to fear the mark as much as you think you have to.

That aside, Katelyn and I have decided to move closer to you. Maybe next time instead of writing a letter we could meet for a cup of coffee? If you feel you are up for it, that is.

Sincerely yours,

Aaron M. Minyard.”

Andrew still hadn’t written a response back, but Aaron was used to Andrew's letters taking weeks to come back. Andrew wrote back when he felt like it, not as soon as he got the letter like Aaron and Nicky did. The letter had made him think about the soulmate mark again, despite the fact that he really just wanted to stop hearing about it all the time. He had talked about it with Bee in some of their letters, where he allowed himself to be a bit more vulnerable. She, too, had said that he didn't have to fear the soulmate mark, that it would not give him someone like Drake, or the others that came before him. Andrew hadn’t found anyone of the like, yet, but he also didn’t allow his hook ups to touch his soulmate mark either. It was too much to think about, so he willed himself to fall asleep and forget the content of the letter. Not that he ever could, but just for the night it worked.

-

Living for a week with Neil had taught Andrew a few things: Neil always woke up early to go for a run, he has a binder he hides in different parts of his room every day, and he is not one to quickly reveal his past. Andrew had ended up paying Allison to do some digging into Neil Josten, but Allison worked thorough, not fast. He was still waiting for her to hand him a file with information about him, when he decided that he had waited long enough.

The following day when Neil leaves early for his morning run, Andrew sneaks into Neil’s bedroom. Finding the binder doesn’t take that long, he knows the best hiding spots in his own spare bedroom. He finds it in the hole in the mattress that Nicky had made by accident, and pulls it out to dig through. It’s filled with coded pieces of papers that Andrew assumes must be numbers like the ones found in Mystery woman’s house. Whether they’re the same Andrew can’t say, because they’re still not done deciphering the ones from Mystery Woman and chances are that even if they’re the same, the code is different for the sheets he’s holding. Other pages are random cut outs from newspapers, but Andrew can’t say what they have in common, except for an overlapping theme of being about dead people. Some of them are even foreign, including ones from Austria, The Netherlands, France, Spain and a whole bunch of other countries. From what he can tell, they’re mostly about a string of murders that happened years ago, some of them are obituaries, but all of them are from before both of them were even in the police academy. The deaths don’t seem to have anything in common either, so Andrew tucks everything back into the binder and puts it back in the hole in the mattress. Andrew is about to pull his hand out, when he feels something else, a small plastic card. He pulls it out and finds himself staring straight at an ID with Neil’s face on it, but the name reads Phil Young. He seems to be no older than 15 in it, but it still doesn’t add up, even the birth date is different than the one on Neil’s ID. Andrew had only seen it because a copy of it had been lying on Wymack’s desk a few days earlier. Andrew doesn’t have much time to investigate, because Neil will be back any minute now. He shoves the ID back where he found it and decides not to bring it up yet. Instead, he goes to the kitchen to make breakfast for him and Neil, who returns shortly after Andrew steps into the kitchen, and he makes his way to the spare bedroom to get changed. It only takes Neil three minutes before he realises something is wrong and he storms into the kitchen.

“Stay the fuck out of my stuff,” he hisses.

“I thought you were fine with me digging into your secrets,” Andrew says, voice overly sweet. He keeps his back turned to Neil, instead focussing all his attention on making them breakfast

“What I hide is none of your fucking business, Andrew.”

Andrew shrugs and finally turns to see Neil looking properly pissed off. Andrew decides he kinda likes the look of it. “I only found your binder. It didn’t make much sense to me anyway,” he says before turning back to the eggs. “You like european true crime?”

“None of your business,” Neil spits out before returning to his bedroom. Andrew decides to let him be, he’ll come for breakfast when he’s calmed down enough on his own accord. They have to go to work soon anyway, but when Neil does come in he tells Andrew he’ll just walk. He doesn’t try to change Neil’s mind, just watches as he leaves the house without breakfast.

-

At work Neil keeps a distance from Andrew, only talking to him when he needs something from him or to talk through theories. Andrew almost misses having his annoying small talk disrupting his work, but there is a big case they’re trying to close and Andrew has a lot of paperwork to do, so he also welcomes the peace and quiet he’s been given for once. Neil is working on some cases Wymack assigned him to keep him busy when TB is quiet and they have no new work to do. They’re just easy robberies and stuff like that, so Neil usually flies through them easily. Today is no different, except when he is done he goes to talk to Kevin instead. Andrew ignores it, because the door to the precinct opens and Allison Reynolds walks inside, holding a briefcase that she all but throws down on Andrew’s desk.

“I got you your file. No-“ she adds when Andrew reaches for the briefcase. “Not in here. Come to the park during your lunch break and pick it up, yeah?”

Andrew turns to look at the clock, his lunch break is in half an hour anyway, so he nods without another word.

“Good, see you then.”

Allison picks her briefcase up, briefly says hi to Renee and Kevin, then goes to the detective she is working with to talk about certain details. Andrew finishes up some paperwork in the half hour he has before his lunch break, then he gets up and follows Allison out of the building. They get some food from a street vendor before making their way into the park. Allison takes him a far end away from the precinct, before finding a place to sit with Andrew. They eat their lunch in silence for a while, before Allison opens her briefcase and tosses him the file.

“Turns out Neil Josten didn’t exist until 8 years ago. Emelia Josten on the other hand, has only existed for a month or two,” Allison says.

Andrew flips through the file, filled with information about Neil Josten and what he’d been up to these past 8 years. The file for Emelia is much smaller, but it wasn’t really the one he was interested in in the first place. He told Allison he wanted both files to see if they were relatives, but she levels him with a look that says she clearly doesn’t believe him anymore. Andrew ignores her look in favour of digging for his wallet and handing her some cash.

“Thanks. Keep the change for the extra work.”

Allison hums and pockets the money. “I was going to do so anyway. You’re going to tell me why I have to dig into your coworkers or what?”

Andrew doesn’t answer, just finishes his food and keeps eating. Allison isn’t one to give up so quickly either though, so she waits for him to finish before impatiently tapping her foot to the floor.

“Some things didn’t add up, but I trust him not to be crooked,” Andrew says.

Apparently that’s enough for Allison, because she grabs her briefcase and stands up. “Well, I better get back to work then. See you later!”

And with that, Andrew is alone. He still has some time left before he has to head over back, and he spends it looking through the files he’s been given. They don’t tell him much, but he suspects Neil will fill in the gaps when they get home.

-

At the end of their shift, Neil decides he wants to catch a ride with Andrew again. They spend it in silence, but Andrew doesn’t mind. He’s trying to think of a way to give Neil the file, but eventually he settles on just handing it to him the moment they walk into the living room. He takes it out of his bag and tosses it at Neil who catches it on instinct.

“What is this?”

“Read it,” is all Andrew says before he disappears to go feed Sir.

Neil takes his sweet time reading it, but eventually he comes into the kitchen, looking ghostly pale.

“Where did you get this?”

“I asked a friend for a favour. So, how come Neil Josten is only eight years old?”

Neil turns paler, his eyes darting around the room for the nearest exit. Andrew only allows it for a while, before he moves to stand directly in front of the window leading to the fire exit.

“Were you Phill Young before that, or is that another fucking fake identity?”

Neil doesn’t answer, so Andrew continues.

“I told you I was going to find out who you were. I still don’t think you’re a threat to the investigation, but I don’t like it when people lie to me. Spill it, Josten.”

Neil looks at him, the look on his face almost turning into one of relief. He lets out a shaky sigh and then nods.

“Emelia was my mother. We are…  _ were _ running from something. We lost each other, she probably found me and took the same last name as me so she could come back into my life. I never knew what we were running from, but it wasn’t TB, that much I do know. I think it has to do with her family, that’s what those news clippings were about. The last time I checked the remainder of her family had died, murdered or by old age I’m not sure. We were safe, so we could regroup. I guess she crossed paths with TB and pissed him off, causing him to kill her. Look, I want to catch him just as badly as the rest, please don’t take me off this case. I promise you I’m not a threat”

Andrew looks at him, then shrugs and snatches the file from him. He takes the part on Emelia Josten out of it, then lights the part about Neil on fire using the stove.

“Alright. I believe you, no one needs to know what I know,” Andrew says.

“Thank you,” Neil whispers.

When he turns to watch Neil again, he sees a clear look of relief on his face. Andrew doesn’t care for Neil or the breakdown he’ll undoubtedly have any time now, so he shoos him out of the kitchen to make dinner. He uses the quiet to spend some time thinking. He does trust Neil, a gut instinct telling him that Neil isn’t lying to him. 

_ You’ll know when you meet them _ .

Andrew shakes his head, as if it’ll clear the message out of his head. He isn’t actually sure whether Neil is his soulmate, doesn’t think so, but Aaron sure knows how to get into his head without even being there. He’s so distracted by it, that he almost burns their dinner. He mutters a curse under his breath and turns off the stove. Dinner is still salvageable, so he finishes cooking and brings two plates into the living room, giving one to Neil. He quietly takes it, not saying anything, but Andrew can tell the anger from earlier is mostly gone. They eat their dinner in silence, but it’s no surprise that Neil breaks it.

“Why did you dig into my past?” He asks

Andrew shrugs. “Some things didn’t add up. Just wanted to make sure you weren’t a crook.”

Neil nods, then stays silent for a while before speaking again. “And?”

Andrew looks at him, waiting to elaborate. Neil almost smiles, but seems to catch himself in the nick of time and Andrew hates the strange feeling settling down in his stomach.

“Am I a crook?” Neil asks. Andrew shakes his head that, no, Neil isn’t a crook. Neil hums and pushes his dinner around with his fork again. “So no more digging into my past?”

“No more digging into your past,” Andrew agrees.

This time, Neil does smile. They eat the rest of their dinner together and Neil goes to clean the dishes, leaving Andrew alone to think about what Neil is doing to him. He cuts the night short early, claiming he is tired from hard work at the precinct. It’s a lie, but it’s the only way Andrew can get away from Neil without looking suspicious. When he goes to sleep he ends up thinking about Neil again, though. About how frustrating and annoying he is, but the fact how Neil had trusted him with that small piece of information about his past had almost made Andrew feel- No, stupid. Andrew forces himself to fall asleep, these aren’t thoughts he should have at night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter two will be up a week from now! I am really excited to share the rest and I promise I wont put a big sappy author note in the front of it but sometimes you gotta share your love for your friends!
> 
> Anywho! Come say hi to me [Over here on my tumblr](https://eloquent-apollo.tumblr.com/)  
> and tell me what you thought of this chapter in the comments/in an ask or however you want to do it


	2. 1936 part two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I forgot to share the link to my spotify list in the last chapter because I was too busy gushing over my friends so [here it is!](https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6ErASYd20Rbe5L6DALQ4Ah?si=KOzpdNBLRB-TWYICVN4Mow)  
> 

His alarm wakes him up at 5 AM the following day. Andrew lets it ring for a few minutes before slamming his alarm clock with his hand to shut it up. He stays where he is for a few seconds, slowly reaching out to look for Sir, but he is gone. The bedroom door is wide open and Andrew feels a sense of panic for a few seconds, until he hears the sound of Neil cursing in the kitchen.

Neil had been in his room, but he hadn’t done anything. He slowly got out of bed and closed the door, giving himself privacy as he got changed. He couldn’t fight off the uncomfortable feeling that Neil had seen something he wasn’t supposed to see. He thinks for a second that maybe Neil snuck in as revenge, to see if he could find information on Andrew to use against him like he used the file against Neil, that Neil didn’t trust him enough at all. That is, until he sets foot into the kitchen and finds Neil feeding Sir the fancy food Andrew had recently purchased.

“Morning. He was complaining, so I let him out,” Neil explained.

Just like that the uncomfortable feeling was gone. Andrew only nodded in response and set to work on making breakfast for the two of them. Just like the days before, Neil watches as Andrew cooks eggs and bacon.

“Can’t even make bacon and eggs?” he asks

“Not really,” Neil admitted.

Andrew rolled his eyes but almost in a fond manner, and gestures for Neil to come a bit closer as he makes them breakfast. He explained what he was doing, why he had the fire as high as he had, why he didn’t use as much butter for the bacon as he did for the eggs and any other question Neil may have had. It felt somewhat nice to be doing these types of things with someone. Andrew had never even expected to feel joy in doing something with another person, or feeling a slight sliver of endearment as Neil’s eyes lit up a bit when he offered to let him cook some eggs for himself. It was weird and it made him think back to the contents of Aaron’s letters again. _A soulmate is someone you should be able to trust, you’ll know it’s them because being with them will feel right from the moment you meet them._ echoed through Andrew's head as he watched Neil scrambling some eggs. That was ridiculous. Just because he had decided to trust Neil, it didn’t mean they were soulmates. Andrew would have to tell Aaron to stop putting ideas into his head the next time he saw him, because the stupid letter was starting to distract Andrew.

Lucky for Andrew, the phone in his house rang to distract him. He picked it up and was not at all surprised when it was Wymack’s gruff voice that greeted him. Only his superior officer would ring him at an hour as ungodly as 5:30 AM.

“TB strikes again. You and Josten are awake enough to check it out, I assume? CSI is already at the scene.”

“Yes, we are. Will Detective Walker be there as well or do you want me and detective Josten to handle it by ourselves?”

“I’ll send Renee, but be warned that the scene is quite gruesome. We haven’t figured out who the victim is yet, but it appears to be a white male of around 27 years of age.”

Andrew listened and wrote the address down that Wymack gave him, he couldn’t quite shake the feeling that he had heard the street name before, but today his usual perfect memory failed him for the first time ever. He shook the feeling, before heading back to the kitchen where Neil was putting the scrambled eggs on some toast that Andrew had made earlier.

“Here, I hope it tastes good,” Neil smiled at him. All animosity from the other day is gone, though Andrew doesn’t really understand why. Perhaps it’s because Andrew had promised to keep Neil’s secrets safe.

Andrew takes the toast from Neil without a word, trying not to think about how he had quite a nice smile. This wasn’t supposed to be happening. He took a bite from the eggs, which lacked any salt and pepper but were otherwise good. He made a gesture at the spices cabinet and Neil began to dig for salt and pepper for him.

“You better eat your eggs and bacon fast, because TB left us another corpse to fetch.”

“Ah, alright.”

Neil grabbed his eggs and went to the spare room to get changed, leaving Andrew behind to finish his breakfast in peace and quiet. Perhaps living with Neil wasn’t going to be as bad as Andrew had expected it to be. In the time it took for Andrew to finish his breakfast, Neil managed to get ready, and soon they were in Andrew's car driving to a new victim. TB was not just passing through, it seemed. TB was going to stay in their city long enough to give Andrew and his colleagues trouble and a headache.

The drive to the crime scene was familiar and Andrew realised it was because Aaron had moved into the same street. He hadn’t actually been at the house yet, but he had driven through the street with Aaron. He remembered Aaron talking about having children in this neighborhood, how growing old here with two kids would be so great. He would have to tell Aaron this street was apparently known for housing gangsters. They stop outside of a quaint old house and Andrew realises. He got out of the car and pushed past the people standing at the front door.

“Detective Minyard?!?” Jill from CSI called out, but Andrew ignores her, instead running to the crime scene. It couldn’t be true. It couldn’t be

But it was. A 27 unknown white male, except he wasn’t unknown. On the floor laid the headless remains of Aaron Michael Minyard.

“No..” Andrew whispered. This feeling, this undeniably stinging anger, he hadn’t felt it in years. Not since he was 11, since he learned to turn his emotions off and take it out on only himself

“Andrew?” Neil gently grabbed his left wrist, causing Andrew to tense up. It wasn’t the unwanted physical contact that made him uneasy, but the realisation that Neil was touching his soulmate mark. He didn’t want to focus on it, he wanted very badly for this to not be real.

“Jesus, Andrew, that’s not-“ One of the responding officers began, but Andrew cut him off with a nod.

“It’s Aaron,” Andrew said, his voice hoarse.

He couldn’t do this, not right now. He had to shove his feelings deep down so he could work the case, so he could catch TB before anyone else did- before Neil did- and kill TB by himself. It was the only right punishment for what TB had done to Aaron. The state’s death penalty couldn’t fix this, only Andrew could. Of course the officers had a different plan in mind, now that Andrew was directly involved with one of the victims, law said he couldn’t work the case anymore, still Andrew couldn’t move. He had failed Aaron, hadn’t been able to keep him safe. He didn’t want to leave him behind again, but Neil gently pulled him along, taking him back to his car. Andrew didn’t want to go, but Neil kept his hand on his shoulder steering him along and so Andrew turned his back on his brother again, and left.

Outside he found Katelyn, crying in the arms of some of her neighbours. Their eyes caught for only a second, because the look of Andrew was obviously too much for Katelyn to bear. Her crying turned more hysterical, as she wailed and sobbed about how it couldn’t be true. Andrew could only stare at her, feeling tears burning behind his eyes. It had taken so long for Andrew to gain his brother back, only for him to lose him so violently to TB’s violence. He tore his gaze from Katelyn, instead to Neil’s face.

“I’m sorry, Andrew,” Neil whispered.

That was it. He got back into his car, only waiting for Neil to get in and close the door before speeding off. He didn’t know where he was going, nor did he care. Neil didn’t ask, didn’t try to reach for him again, only sat there to keep Andrew company in his silent grief and fury. Andrew didn’t stop until he was out of Columbia and into Charleston, stopping at Folly beach. He got out of his car, Neil following him quietly as he began to walk down the shore line. There was no one right now during the cold winter and Andrew’s coat only barely managed to keep the biting cold out. He didn’t care, he just walked for hours until the cold was gone, until he couldn’t feel his fingers, anything, except for the aching grief in his chest and hatred for TB burning in his chest.

“Andrew?” Neil, who had feen following Andrew from a distance, finally caught up to him. “We are being followed. I assume it’s TB’s men.”

“Good. Let them come then,” Andrew hissed, but Neil grabs his shoulder and turns Andrew so that he is facing Neil. “I don’t like it when people touch me.”

Neil lets go of him immediately. “Listen, if this really is TB or their men, they won’t let us get away easily. We have to go back to the car, drive back to safety.”

Before they can, they are surrounded by TB’s men. Andrew draws his gun, aiming it at one of them. The majority of them carry knives, except for two with guns, and when he looks at Neil he can tell he has the same idea. Take out the guys with guns first, then the knives, then call Wymack.

“Drop your weapons, don’t make me use this,” Andrew warns.

The men, of course, ignore his warning. The first gun shot is loud, but the bullet misses. Neil’s bullet on the other hand, does not. Neil aims to disarm the men, but when another guy with a gun aims for Andrew, Andrew aims to kill. His bullet misses and Andrew is temporarily distracted by a guy trying to swing a knife in his face. He uses his gun to headbut the guy with a knife, knocking him out and taking his knife from him.

“Funny, you’re putting up more of a fight than your brother. I expected the same, the helpless pleading and the crying,” one guy says. White hot anger flares up and Andrew responds by dropping his gun, pulling his arm back, and knocking the guy unconscious with one swing. The fighting has stopped around them, most having fled or been disarmed by Neil.

“I won’t mention it. You did what you had to do,” Neil says, before walking off in search of a nearby phone booth.

It takes a while for Wymack to make it to Charleston, but by the time he’s there Andrew and Neil have given their witness statement a couple of times to Neil’s old boss. The guys that had been disarmed all refuse to speak about who they work for, but as annoying as it is, it’s a blessing in disguise. They won’t talk about Andrew punching one of their men in the face, either. Neil, as promised, has kept his mouth shut about the occurrence as well. Together they wait for Wymack to come and pick them up and drive back to their own precinct in Colombia. When Wymack does show up, he is quieter than usual. He waits for Neil and Andrew to approach him, taking the paperwork from Neil that he has to fill in regarding the attack on his police officers

“Andrew, I don’t want you driving. Give the keys to Neil and figure out who you’re riding back with,” Wymack says, before disappearing to have a quick talk with Neil’s boss.

Andrew tosses the keys to Neil and follows him to his own car. Sitting in the passenger seat is strange, he hadn’t hitched a ride with anyone ever since he learned how to drive. He feels Neil’s eyes on him, while Andrew stares straight ahead at the Charleston precinct.

“Stop staring,” Andrew says.

“Andrew-“ Neil whispers, his voice unsteady. Andrew had been too caught up in his own grief to notice Neil’s growing panic attack. He turns in his chair and reaches out, putting a hand on the back of Neil’s neck, who tenses slightly at the sudden touch. Andrew doesn’t know how to deal with his own grief, but this, dealing with Neil, this he can do. He puts a bit more pressure on Neil’s neck, which seems to help in grounding him in the here and now. Neil’s breathing steadies out and he reaches out to grab Andrew’s hand.

“You are-“

“Shut up.”

Andrew pulls his hand away, seeing a hint of the burst of bright colour on Neil’s neck. _Soulmates_. Neither he nor Neil say a single word during their drive back to the precinct, but Andrew knows this silence will be broken the moment they’re home.

-

Wymack officially takes Andrew off the case and tells him to take time off. When Andrew opens his mouth to protest, Wymack shakes his head.

“Don’t even think about it, Andrew. If I see you back here this week, I’ll have you fired. Take the time off to process this, okay?”

Andrew says nothing in response, but lets Neil drag him out of the office and back to the car. Andrew feels numb and empty, he aches to replace it with the comforting buzz of alcohol. Neil seems to read his mind, because they stop at a liquor store. Andrew goes inside and returns with 2 bottles of whiskey. He doesn’t even wait for Neil to drive out of the parking lot before opening one and taking a chug, feeling relaxed when the comfortable burn of alcohol settles in his stomach. Neil doesn’t say a word, only drives them back to Andrew’s apartment as he chugs his alcohol back like it’s a bottle of water. They slowly make their way upstairs and Neil moves to take Andrew’s keys, but he glares at him and unlocks the door on his own. He isn’t completely helpless or drunk, the latter usually won’t happen because Andrew knows when to quit. Today, that just means he knows how much he needs till he can finally lose this numb feeling that has settled in his body. The grief has a gravity that settles in his bones, making them heavy. It feels like the grief is trying to drag Andrew down. He ignores it and keeps walking, until he finds the couch and lays down on it with his second bottle of whiskey. He’s about to open it, when Neil’s hand gently wraps around Andrew’s fingers holding the bottle. Andrew looks at him, while Neil uses his other hand to gently pull it away. When Andrew releases his hold on the bottle, Neil releases his hand and screws the lid off the bottle, taking a few chugs before handing it back to Andrew. They pass the bottle between each other for a while, until it’s empty and Neil moves to the couch.

“Can I?” He whispers.

Andrew only nods while Neil slowly climbs next Andrew on the couch, wrapping an arm around him for stability. Andrew intertwines their legs and places one arm behind Neil on his back to keep him against his chest, making sure he won’t fall off the couch. They lie together in silence for a while, Andrew focuses on the burn of the alcohol spreading through his body, rather than his heart that is beating in his chest.

“Andrew?” Neil shifts, their faces only inches of each other now. A _soulmate is someone who should love us and keep us safe._ Aaron’s words echo in Andrew’s mind as he closes the distance between him and Neil, pressing their lips together. He can taste the alcohol on Neil’s lips as he bites gently on his lower lip. Neil moves his hands to rest in Andrew’s hair, playing with his curls and occasionally tugging on them to get a groan of satisfaction out of Andrew. When Neil moves one of his hands to Andrew’s back, holding to the edges of his shirt, Andrew breaks away.

“No,” He breathes out, his breath coming out in short huffs.

“No?” Neil echoes softly

“We’re drunk.”

Neil nods and buries his face in Andrew’s neck instead. Andrew stays that way with him until Neil’s breathing evens out as he drifts off into sleep. Andrew can not sleep with Neil clinging to him, so when he is sure he’s deep asleep, he climbs out of his arms and returns to his bedroom. He lays down on his bed, the comfortable burn of alcohol still fighting to keep the numbness out, but in the end the numbness wins and forces him to dream about Aaron’s headless corpse.

-

The next morning Andrew wakes early and he knows something is wrong. His window is open, but it isn’t the cold morning air that makes him shiver, it’s the bloody cleaver laying on his dresser, next to a note. He stands, his legs threatening to give out under him as he walks to the dresser. He grabs the note, cursing his hands for shaking the way they do as he reads over the cut out magazine letters.

**“Dear detective Andrew,**

**Such a shame we had to kill your brother. I hadn’t wanted to go so far as to do it, but you left me no choice. You were coming too close, so your brother had to pay the price. His screams and cries were like music to my ears, you know? I haven’t ever had a victim cry that way before! Cutting him apart was so much fun, because I got to imagine it was you who I killed. Now that you’re off the case I can breathe easy. You have a cousin you care a lot about right? Let’s hope he stays in Germany.**

**Sincerely,**

**TB”**

Andrew knows better than to destroy the evidence, so instead he punches his mirror with his hand. The pain shoots all the way up to his elbow, but Andrew doesn’t care, he ignores the pain and punches the already shattered mirror again. He’s about to draw back for another punch, when he feels a hand on his shoulder. He doesn’t have to turn around to know it’s Neil, he simply let’s him guide him out of his bedroom and into the hallway. Neil doesn’t touch him anymore after that, he only stands close to Andrew to make sure he can’t harm himself any further. Andrew finally allows himself to calm down in Neil’s presence, but he still tries to fight the tears burning behind his eyes until he can’t anymore. Until they all silently begin to pour down his face and Neil pulls Andrew close, letting him bury his face in his chest.

“Do you want me to call Wymack?” Neil asks, to which Andrew responds with a weak nod.

Neil doesn’t move until Andrew’s tears have stopped, then he slowly let’s go of Andrew and calls Wymack. Not even an hour later the place is crawling with police and a medic who takes care of Andrew’s hand and stitches. They find no evidence other than the cleaver and the letter and Andrew can’t answer any questions they ask because he was asleep when TB snuck in. Wymack tries to get everyone out of the house as soon as he can without rushing the investigation process. He looks like he wants to say something to Andrew, but then changes his mind and leaves the house. Andrew welcomes the quiet, even Neil is nowhere to be found, until he hears the sound of someone going through his cupboards. A few minutes later Neil returns with two cups of hot cocoa, giving one to Andrew who gratefully accepts. He allows himself to search for comfort, leaning against Neil as they sip on their hot drinks.

“They’ll find who did this,” Neil promises after a few seconds.

“If I don’t find him first,” Andrew responds

Neil only pulls Andrew closer, placing a soft kiss on the top of his head. Andrew wouldn’t have allowed this two years ago, but he has grown and he is alright with admitting he needs to be comforted right now, even if he would still never admit it out loud. So Neil and Andrew spend the rest of the afternoon taking care of each other.

-

While Andrew is forced to stay at home under surveilance of the police now that TB has announced he knows where Andrew lives and holds a grudge, Neil is allowed to keep working. There are two cops keeping watch over Andrew by his front door, while another comes to take Neil to work everyday. When Neil returns he and Andrew curl up on the couch, Neil telling stories about what happened at work and giving him all the details about TB while Andrew holds him in his arms and strokes his back. If they spend hours on that couch because Andrew keeps interrupting Neil to kiss him, well, neither of them complain about it. Andrew knows Neil and Wymack are closing in on finding out who TB really is, as he was finally seen during his most recent murder. The witness doesn’t want to actually talk to them yet, though, for some reason, but Neil promised that today he’d figure it out. Andrew gives him a short kiss as he leaves, then sets to cleaning the house up. He’d let it get rather messy in the aftermath of Aaron’s death and whenever Neil tried to clean it up, Andrew ended up stopping him by kissing him and guiding him back to his bedroom.

Cleaning the house is the right type of work to keep his mind off of everything that has happened these past few days, the letter still freshly burned into his memories. It takes him a while to move to the bedrooms and he moves to the guest one first. He opens the door, steps inside and stops. He hadn’t been in Neil’s room all that much and neither had Neil, which explained why it wasn’t very cleaned, but it isn’t the mess that made Andrew stop dead in his tracks. It’s the stack of magazines on Neil’s dresser and as he picks one up he recognises the font. Opening the magazine up and going through it proves what he already knew. Neil was TB. Neil had left him that note, that’s why the witness didn’t want to talk, because TB was right there in front of him.

“Andrew? What’s that in your hands?” Andrew hadn’t heard Neil enter, but he turns and Neil backs away at the look on Andrew’s face.

“How long were you gonna keep this up, TB?” Andrew’s voice is calm and steady, but the tremble in his hands betray what he’s really feeling. They’re shaking with rage, won’t stop shaking, until they’re around Neil’s throat, squeezing the air out of his lungs. Neil tries to fight, knocking something over in the process, but Andrew forces him to the floor, getting on top of him, briefly remembering the nights before where he allowed Neil to touch him, but it only adds to his anger. He screams, or he has been screaming in anger for the past few minutes, but suddenly there are a pair of strong hands dragging him off of Neil and his vision goes black with fury. He fights against the hands but they’re too strong, they won’t let go, so Andrew gives up. He gives up, lets himself drop to his knees again while the hands refuse to let go.

“Detective?” Only now does he recognise the voice as Pete, one of the police officers that kept watch over him the past few days.

“He’s TB. He fucking killed my brother,” Andrew says. he feels Pete’s hands loosening in shock, and he takes his chance to leap at Neil and punch him across the face. This time it takes Pete a bit longer to shake Andrew off, but not over a lack of trying. When he has gotten Andrew off of Neil, he calls for backup and Neil is taken to the precinct where Andrew would later find out the witness finally testified against TB.

-

Neil doesn’t try to fight against the idea that he is The Butcher, he knows his father has men within the precinct and has paid off judges , jury and lawyers already. The only person he wants him to believe Neil isn’t actually responsible for all this doesn’t come to visit him, so Neil sits in his cell in silence, only talking to his lawyer. He doesn’t have much of a shot of getting out of there anyway, his lawyer doesn’t want him to take a plea deal, because a plea deal will keep him alive. He continues to refuse to cooperate, not because he thinks he can be assigned a new lawyer that won’t be paid off by his father, but because it’s simply easier this way. He’s got multiple death sentences staring back at him at the other end of the line and Neil isn’t strong enough to stare back. He should have been more careful, especially after his dad got rid of his mother, from there on out it would be only days before he got Neil framed for his own handywork. The only thing Neil can do to keep himself calm, is drag his hand over his soulmate mark. He misses Andrew, misses how quickly he felt connected, but knows better than to think he may get it back. Today is his last hearing, all Neil can hope is that his execution will be held soon, because if he stays in this cell too long his father might pay someone off to do it for him.

-

His hanging is 3 days from now. Andrew won’t come to watch, Wymack told him himself, it means Neil will die alone. Neil doesn’t think Wymack knows about the payoff, but Wymack doesn’t seem to believe Neil was truly TB either. It doesn’t matter. There is nothing that Wymack or Neil can do to change the fact that three days from now, Neil will be dead.

-

3 days go by faster than Neil could ever imagine, the loneliness of his cell didn’t slow the days down at all. At least it will be over soon and it’s that thought that allows Neil to follow after the officers guiding Neil to the room where he will lose his last breath. There is one thing Neil realises over and over again as the officers grab him roughly and shove him into the room. Killing a cop, or the family of a cop, will not get you in good with the officers and guards in jail. Neil has bruises on his arms from guards handling him too roughly, but Neil cannot blame them. He walks inside and fully takes in the room. Neil’s eyes stop to watch one particular man. Nathan Wesninski sits across the platform where Neil has to stand and die, and Neil finally feels sick. He wants to vomit, wants to cry at the sight of his father, but he can’t bother to appear weak, so instead he lets himself be guided to the platform. They put the noose around his neck and count down. 3, 2, 1, and Neil can’t breathe. He struggles and gasps for air involuntarily, can’t find a way to just let it all happen. He’s finally fucking terrified alright, he feels hot tears streaming down his face as he begs for the darkness to just take him out, and when it finally does come for Neil, he can only think of Andrew and regrets leaving him behind

-

Neil never believed in a concept of heaven or hell, but if he had to choose where he was right now he’d describe it as hell

_Oh yeah, it’s not very pleasant here. Don’t worry my son, you are currently in neither._

A voice echoes all around him, disorienting Neil. He can’t tell if the voice is coming from somewhere in the… wherever it is that he is, or if it’s coming from within his head. Does he even have a head? He can’t even see his own body

_Nathaniel Wesninski, or would you rather be called Neil Josten?_

Neil nods, or he thinks he does. He can’t open his mouth, if he even has one, he can’t form sentences, can barely think, can only feel and be afraid.

_Your soulmate and you got a lousy chance at love. You may choose between two options, but listen closely to me as I explain them. You may reincarnate to be with Andrew again, you’ll lose the memories of this life time and all those before, but this won’t guarantee your next life time will end in love. Your other option is to watch over Andrew, call it a guardian angel role if you will. You can guide him and keep him safe, make sure he improves until the two of you are ready for your life time that will end with love. Call it the correct timeline, if you want. These are the two choices I have to offer you, Neil. Think about it, don’t make overhasted decisions. Where you are right now, no time passes at all and all of it passes at once, so, you have literally forever to think about it! Ha! Call that convenient!_

Neil knows the voice has left him alone to think because he feels he has a mouth again, he feels his body and he can finally think, he still can’t see his body or anything else, but it’s an improvement. He gets to get another shot, he can try again and he can have that happy ending, but the voice said a second shot won’t guarantee it. Then again, apparently Neil had also lived through other life times with Andrew, so there isn’t a way to say if their next lifetime together is their last either.

“Hey? You still there?” Neil calls out. The voice returns, but the restrictions from earlier stay gone. With a shock Neil realises the restrictions were to keep him from panicking and running, though he doubts he could actually escape wherever he is.

_Yes, my son?_

“Will he remember our last life?”

The voice is silent for a short time, but then sighs. _No, not remember the way you remember, say, your last week on earth or your first day at the police academy. He will remember subconsciously, he may resent you the entirety of your next lifetime. It depends, some people forget, even subconsciously._

Neil hums. He knows Andrew won’t subconsciously forget the wrongs TB has done to him, Andrew never forgets anything.

“I have made up my mind.”

_What is your choice, son?_

“I’ll protect him the way I wasn’t able to in this life. I’ll watch over him.”

_Very well. Good luck, Neil._

The darkness finally makes way for light as Neil feels his body being ripped to shreds. It’s painful and if he could he would scream and cry, but he keeps quiet. His old body has to go, it can’t stay to help, so his body is replaced and Neil feels like new as he looks down at himself. He is about to admire it, when the ground below him tears open, and with it, so does his back. He plummets to the ground, sees earth below him and finally he screams. His back feels like it’s being cut open and something is growing out of it, except it doesn’t just feel like it. It’s what’s actually happening. He cries as his wings grow, but they’re done before he can hit the ground and almost on instinct he flies back up. He’ll protect Andrew, won’t ever leave his side if he can avoid it. He’s ready, and by God, the rest better be too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Come say hi to me on my tumblr [over here](https://eloquent-apollo.tumblr.com)  
> 


	3. 1937

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I definitely didn't forget to upload this until I was already in bed. I would never do that I am 100% up to date with my uploading schedule 
> 
> Anyway this is a long one boys sorry!

Andrew keeps having dreams involving Neil. They only recently started plaguing him. Maybe it’s because tomorrow he’ll go back to work again, but it doesn’t matter. When he dreams of Neil, it isn’t the Neil he knew anyway. He doesn’t look the way he should; he has wings that are covered in dried blood, he whispers to him but Andrew can never make out any of the words he says. Tonight is no different, he dreams of Neil with his pure white wings ruined by the stains of blood. He tries to reach for Andrew, tries to talk to him and warn him, but Andrew wakes up before he can hear what Neil wants to say.

Andrew sits up in his bed, rubbing his face as he tries to remember his dream. Usually he has no trouble remembering, but whenever it’s about Neil the memories slip through his fingers. It’s frustrating and Andrew just wants the dreams to stop, but he won’t be able to until he figures out why Neil is plaguing him in the first place. It’s only 5 AM, and work won’t start until nine, so Andrew gets up and searches for a cigarette to smoke. Katelyn had been bugging him to stop, but Andrew ignored her complaints just like he did with most of the things she said. To say they were friends was a lie, Andrew stuck with her to deal with their shared grief over Aaron. Andrew was planning on dropping all contact after that, because he didn’t need that constant reminder, but then Katelyn had called him to say she was pregnant and Andrew wasn’t one to abandon family. He didn’t see Katelyn as family, but his unborn niece or nephew was, so Andrew remained in contact and even found some silent comfort in it. He was glad to have someone with him who understood him when it came to the emotions surrounding Aaron, but he would never admit that to Katelyn. He didn’t want her to think he cared for her, because he did not care at all. When he finally finds his cigarette he lights one and takes a drag, allowing himself a moment to worry about his job. It’s been a while. Wymack didn’t want Andrew returning until after Aaron’s funeral, which they had held shortly after Neil’s death sentence. Aaron’s funeral had been filled with lots of visitors, but Neil’s funeral only had two. Andrew came, though he still doesn’t understand why. The only other person there had been Neil’s fellow officer from back in Charleston and apparent roommate, Matt Boyd. He had cried a lot, had said it wasn’t fair, that Neil wasn’t truly the killer, but it pissed Andrew off so much he had almost threatened him with his knife. Lucky for Matt, he had other places to be, so he got off scot-free. Back then he had still believed it was Neil’s fault that Aaron had to be buried without a head, but the dreams had cast a shadow of doubt in Andrew’s mind.

Sir’s loud meowed complaints, demanding for food force Andrew to temporarily forget about Neil and the strange dreams. He goes to the kitchen to make them both breakfast. He had gotten new fancy cat food to treat Sir with. The bastard, of course, didn’t eat it. Andrew had to give it to a random neighbour, which annoyed him greatly, so today, as a treat, he had given Sir an actual fish. Naturally he did love that.

“Sometimes I wonder why I keep you around,” Andrew said, annoyed. Sir only meows and eats the fish Andrew prepared the night before. He double checked if it was really safe to feed Sir some sardines, and when he found it was okay to give it as an occasional treat, he bought some. Either way, he had spent the night before making sure there were no bones left in the fish and had cooked it. It wasn’t a breakfast he would give him often, but Andrew had gotten Sir two years ago around this day, so he considered it a birthday treat. Stupid cat. After fixing himself a breakfast that consisted of eggs and bacon, Andrew moves to put on his clothes for work. It feels good to finally wear his uniform again, he’s gotten sick and tired of just sitting around and doing nothing. Work will be a great way to distract himself from Neil and the weird dreams he’s been having.

His first day at work is a slow one. He’s mostly given paperwork from others to check for errors and Wymack doesn’t allow him to go to any active scenes just yet. The paperwork is a mess. Andrew scowls as he corrects mistakes with a pen and writes down details they missed based off of pictures that were given to him in files. When he finishes up the first stacks, he goes to find the officers that the files belong to and drops them down on their desks.

“You missed some things, maybe next time investigate as if you want the criminal to be caught,” Andrew says, giving them a bored and unbothered look.

“Glad to have you back, Minyard,” Livvy, one of the detectives, says annoyed, but she opens her files and goes over the details Andrew wrote down for her. 

Andrew doesn’t care how his coworkers feel about him, he just cares that they do their fucking job for once. He makes his way back to his own desk, picking up a new stack of files as he goes to keep himself busy, when Kevin walks over to him. Andrew ignores him, because Kevin usually waits for the officers to realise he’s there, and Andrew plays the “Let’s see how long it takes for Kevin to realise you know he’s there but you’re just ignoring him” game like no other. His record is 15 minutes, but it did end with Kevin getting upset at him and Andrew buying him vodka to make up for it. Kevin only allows Andrew to ignore him for a minute this time, before stealing the file he was working on right out of his hands.

“The cottage murder, huh?” Kevin asks as he flips through the file. “Seen this yet?” He tosses him a picture out of the file which Andrew inspects. It’s a picture of one of the victims. The murder had been a violent one, the floor and walls were covered in the victim’s blood, but clearly that isn’t what Kevin wants to talk about. It only takes Andrew a second to spot it: the tiny TB carved into the woman’s naked thigh.

“I see,” Andrew says, looking up at Kevin. “Copycat?” He asks.

Kevin only shrugs. “I don’t know, I didn’t handle the TB murder, I was too close to you to handle it after… after Aaron,” Kevin sighs, and an uncomfortable silence falls between them for a second. “I think… I think it’s a copycat. TB is dead after all.”

Andrew takes the file back from Kevin, putting the picture back where it belongs and placing it back on the stack of reports he still has to dig through.

“Wymack wants to talk to you,” Kevin says.

“About?”

Kevin shrugs in response and Andrew gets up, making his way to Wymack’s little office with Kevin following him. For a second he thinks Kevin might follow him inside, but he stops in front of his own desk to sit down instead and Andrew enters the office alone.

“Andrew, it’s good to have you back. Take a seat.”

Andrew sits down in the chair across from Wymack. He watches as Wymack seems to struggle to find the right words, but Andrew has no intentions of helping him. It only takes a little while before Wymack decides to take the direct approach, rather than sugarcoating it.

“Listen, kid. I want to know if you think you can actually go to active scenes again tomorrow. We need you around, but if you need to take a while to get used to it I won’t force you.”

Andrew looks blankly at Wymack. He’s not made of glass, Andrew could have gone to an active scene today for all he cared. Wymack, who has known Andrew for long enough to interpret his silence as a yes, sighs and slides him a stack of papers. Andrew takes them but doesn’t open any of them.

“It’s details about Neil. I figured you’d want to read them,” Wymack says.

Andrew looks at him, doesn’t open his mouth, let’s the glare that’s replaced his neutral look on his face speak for him instead. He’s heard the whispers, Kevin even told Andrew to his face when he came by after Neil’s hanging that Wymack didn’t believe Neil was the killer. Andrew didn’t believe it, or rather, didn’t want to believe it. Reading the case files wouldn’t do him any good, they would only confirm the suspicion that’s been eating away at him every morning he wakes from his strange dreams. Wymack only allows the silence for a little longer, before taking the files back and dismissing Andrew with a wave of his hand. For the rest of his shift, Andrew has an odd feeling in his chest he can’t place.

-

_n his dreams Andrew flies with Neil by his side. Neil tries to speak to him, but Andrew can only look down at the ground below, can feel fear eating at his heart, at the edges of his thoughts, threatening to swallow him whole._

_“You need to stop looking at the ground. Focus on flying,” Neil’s voice echoes around Andrew._

_Andrew doesn’t fly, doesn’t focus on his wings, instead he plummets to the ground._

Andrew shoots up in bed with a gasp. The phone in the living room is ringing, demanding his attention, but Andrew still feels his heart beating in his chest, fighting for a way out. It’s the first time Andrew remembers one of his dreams with Neil in it, and he isn’t sure if it’s an improvement or not. He stays in bed, forcing his heart to calm down, while the phone stops ringing, only to start again a few minutes later. Andrew lets it ring for a bit, before getting up to pick up the phone. Sir is sitting by the phone as Andrew walks in, looking like he’s been woken up by it too.

“Yeah, you think I like the sound of it?” Andrew asks, annoyed. Sir only meows in response, and Andrew isn’t lonely enough to pretend it actually means something. He picks up the phone instead.

“What?” He snaps.

“We need you at a scene… You’re going to want to see this.” Andrew doesn’t recognise the voice calling him, but he knows only an officer would call him at this god awful hour, so he agrees to go. The officer gives him an address, but not a name, and Andrew goes to get changed. He makes a single piece of toast, because proper breakfast can wait, and heads out after brushing his teeth shortly. The murder scene isn’t very far away from Andrew’s house, but he takes the car anyway in favour of arriving there quickly.

“Good morning, detective Minyard,” One of the responding officers says.

“It’s fucking 3 AM.”

The officer shrugs and takes him to Renee, who is already inside looking at the crime scene. Andrew can tell it’s a violent one. There is blood on the walls, bloody handprints left by the victim on the wall and shreds of the wallpaper as the killer must have dragged a knife or something like it over it when giving chase. The victim probably wasn’t very fast, considering the amount of blood tracking into the living room. The killer wanted to drag out their death, wanted them to feel afraid and hopeful of escape, but Andrew wouldn’t be here if they had survived. He steps into the living room, where he finds a woman on the floor. Her nightgown has been pulled to shreds, revealing her naked body under it, but it’s covered in blood and deep gastly cuts. That isn’t what Andrew stares at though, he’s used to the corpses and the blood and the stench. It’s the giant bloody TB that’s been written on the wall with the victim’s blood that disorients Andrew.

“Yeah, I guess we were wrong about Neil Josten,” a detective says.

Andrew ignores him. He needs to, or he won’t be able to look at the scene and investigate properly. He pretends not to see Renee’s face as he goes around the room, keeping his back turned to the letters on the wall.

“Culprit snuck in through the bedroom window, killed the husband first and then chased the woman around the house after wounding her. Neighbours heard screaming and called the cops, but didn’t actually see anything,” The responding officer tells them as Andrew crouches next to the dead woman. He only looks her over briefly, before turning to the officer to see the man watching him. “They say she was a criminal too.”

“You don’t think it’s a copycat.” Andrew doesn’t ask, but the officer still chooses to answer him.

“No, I don’t. It fits the pattern, doesn’t it? Neighbours saw no one, victims are criminals too. It’s textbook TB, only it seems he got more daring this time.”

Andrew turns to Renee to see if she has anything to add to that, but she is looking through drawers and doesn’t say a word. She doesn’t have to, because everyone is thinking the same thing. They caught the wrong guy. TB is still running around and now they have to pick up where they thought they ended it three months ago.

-

Andrew walks into Wymack’s office after returning from the crime scene. He expects to be taken off the case, but instead he walks in to find Matt Boyd sitting on a chair in front of Wymack’s desk. Wymack doesn’t have to tell Andrew to sit down. Andrew feels a little like his legs are going to give way. He takes the chair, turns it around and sits down on it, using the backrest to rest his arms on.

“So, TB is back huh?” Andrew asks, keeping his voice steady. He doesn’t spare Matt a single look, refuses to acknowledge Matt is there to help him.

“He is. I know I shouldn’t assign you two to the case, but Andrew, you’re our best detective and Matt has handled the majority of the TB cases with Neil. You two are the best shot we’ve got,” Wymack says.

Andrew doesn’t answer, he’ll take the case. It’s the only thing he can do to make things up to Neil. Matt begins to talk about the cases back in Charleston, but Andrew hardly listens. It’s old news to him already anyway. He thinks back to Neil, thinks about their talks in that short week after Aaron’s death. He doesn’t understand why he was so stupid and didn’t see it any sooner.

“Oh, don’t beat yourself up over it,” A familiar voice says, and Andrew thinks he might actually be going insane after all. He looks around the room, trying not to alert Wymack and Matt who are still talking about the murders. He finds Neil sitting on the desk in the right corner of the room, wearing a strange white tunic that comes up to his knees. There are drops of blood staining it dark red. He has pure white wings, but they’re splattered with dried up blood as well. “Oh, so you can finally see me? Only took you a year. Listen, the others can’t see me, so just ignore me for now.”

Andrew does as he’s told, focusing back on the conversation Matt and Wymack are having.

‘- had an alibi for most of the murders. I don’t know why his lawyer never brought it up.”

“Pay off,” Neil says.

“Pay off,” Andrew echoes.

Wymack and Matt turn their attention on Andrew.

“He was probably paid off by the real TB to have Neil framed for the crime. Everyone has a breaking point. Money is powerful enough to tip the scales of morality.”

“Yeah. That’s true. That probably means TB is a rich and influential person,” Wymack says.

Andrew doesn’t say anything else, but listens until Wymack dismisses them. Andrew doesn’t have to take home another guest this time, and he’s glad because he wants nothing more than to go home alone and yell at Neil. Andrew speeds on the drive home and Neil sits next to him in the passenger seat. It’s weird to see him sitting there after accepting he had died two months ago already. Neil seems to understand his strange feelings, because he sits there and says nothing the entire drive. The moment he steps into his apartment, he turns to Neil.

“What the fuck, Josten?”

Neil shrugs. “I got to choose. Either I stayed with you, or I moved on. I decided to stay.”

“Why?”

“To help you,” Neil says, his voice so genuine it makes Andrew feel sick.

“Get the fuck out of here,” Andrew hisses through clenched teeth. He’s dizzy and needs a drink. He wants to sleep and simultaneously wants to wake up and pretend this never happened.

“Alright, I’ll be back tomorrow,” Neil says and disappears.

Andrew drinks an entire bottle of whiskey that night. When he sleeps, he dreams of falling and flying, but Neil is nowhere to be found.

-

Neil returns the following morning like he promised. Andrew finds him sitting on the dining table in the living room, playing with Sir. Andrew watches them only for a minute or two, before leaving to make breakfast. Sir doesn’t come after him like usual, but Andrew doesn’t care, it means Neil is still preoccupied and Andrew has the time to think about things. Neil came back for him, had said he wanted to help him. Neil doesn’t hate him for what he’s did, but instead he wants to help. The thought confuses Andrew, and perhaps it even scares him a little. _A soulmate is supposed to be there for you._

Andrew slams a cabinet shut in frustration and all but throws his pan on the fire. This isn’t love, it’s childish dependency and Andrew has grown to hate it over the months when he was alone. Or maybe he started to hate being alone and maybe that’s why he feels afraid. Maybe that’s why he’s so angry that Neil is back. He doesn’t feel alone anymore and it means he has to face the fact that he _needs_ Neil. Andrew has never needed anyone in his life, not even Nicky and Aaron, but Neil is different. Neil is his soulmate, and Andrew only got to have him for two weeks before he lost him. Maybe the aching he felt had been for Neil after all.

“Are you ready to talk, or do you want to burn your eggs first?” Neil asks behind him.

“Bold words from a man who couldn’t even cook something as easy as bacon,” Andrew returns, failing only a little to keep the bite out of his words.

Neil doesn’t rise to the bait, if anything, he just looks amused as Andrew turns to face him. Neil waits for Andrew to speak, to tell him off for trying to talk, but Andrew never does, so Neil shrugs and goes to sit on the kitchen counter, right next to him as Andrew cooks. His eyes briefly flash over Neil’s legs, which are visible under the short toga, before he drags them back to stare at his eggs. He flips them over and deems they’re not as burned as Neil made them out to be. He hears Sir walking in behind him, the soft padding of his paws alerting Andrew of him coming closer. He watches him jump up the counter and lay his head in Neil’s lap, who scratches Sir behind his ear with a soft look on his face, and Andrew almost feels like this is what his life was supposed to be. He ignores the sting that thought gives him, trying to remember when he started allowing himself to feel so much again, but comes up empty. The only thing he can think of is Neil, and so he blames Neil.

“Why did you come back?”

“I already told you, to help. TB is still out there, and he won’t stop until someone catches him,” Neil says, not once looking to meet Andrew’s eyes. It just adds to the stupid stinging, so Andrew forces his emotions down so deep he won’t ever have to look at them again. It’s harder than it used to be, but he manages.

“Why did he frame you? Why you?”

“Because TB is my father. Emelia was indeed my mother, but we ran away when I was 8. We split up when I was 16, but I guess she found me back. Not before my father found the both of us, though. No better way to get rid of me than this. It was killing two birds with one stone. He got the cops off of his back and he could get rid of me.”

“Except he couldn’t stay gone, he came back.”

Neil nods quietly, but he says nothing else. Andrew cooks his breakfast without saying another word giving him some time to think about the new information he’s been given. TB was Neil’s father, that’s why he ended up getting framed. The department had absolutely no theories as to why Neil had been framed. Neil was closed off and kept to himself, even when Andrew and him were seeing eachother. He realises that he really didn’t know all that much about Neil, other than that he didn’t like eggs for breakfast, his favourite dinner food was lasagna, and his lips were soft but his words were sharp. He wonders if Matt knew more than Andrew did, if Matt had learned all of Neil’s little habits the way Andrew should have been able to. These kinds of thoughts are useless, though, and if anything, they just piss Andrew off.

“So, are you going to help me at work today?” Andrew asks.

Neil smiles and nods, so Andrew leaves to get changed for work.

-

At work, Matt is nowhere to be found. Andrew assumes he is late, so he grabs a few files he hadn’t gotten around to finishing yet because of the day before and he sits at his desk to flip through them. Neil, who had kept true to his promise and had come with him to the precinct, sits on the desk. He is mostly looking out of the windows, but occasionally he’ll come and help him by looking with him through the files and mumbling some theories and other things. Andrew appreciates the help, so he doesn’t shoo Neil away. He’s so engrossed in the work on his files, he misses it when Matt walks in.

“Hey! Sorry I’m late, traffic was hell.” He plops down at the desk across from him and lays down a file about the new recent murder from TB.

“It really is a bad one, huh,” he says before sliding the file Andrew’s way. He takes it so he can look through it with Neil, despite the fact that he had been there at the crime scene. He says nothing, but reaches for the file that Kevin had shown him earlier about a murder they were suspecting might have been the work of TB as well and slides it Matt’s way. The cottage murder hadn’t been nearly as violent as the new case had been. The only way they could tie it to TB was by the small initials that had been carved into the woman’s thigh. The other detectives all sided with Kevin, but Andrew isn’t entirely sure yet.

“Why would TB commit such a careful crime, then go all out again for the next one?” Andrew asks.

“Maybe he was mad we weren’t noticing him any sooner?” Matt looked up from the file. “Think about it, he got us off his back so he stopped killing, but the need for violence comes back so he starts off small. It’s not as thrilling as it used to be, though, because the media doesn’t piece his deaths together as a pattern. He starts leaving small clues at his crime scenes, but we keep quiet to avoid a panic by the public. It’s the opposite of what he wants, though, so instead he kills again, and this time he leaves a visiting card too big to ignore. He wants attention, so he is getting it.”

Andrew hums in silent agreement. It makes sense, but he looks carefully towards Neil for his intel. Neil doesn’t immediately notice it, because he’s looking at the cottage murder file, but when he finally looks up to meet Andrew’s eyes, he nods quietly. Matt picks the file back up when he realises he won’t be getting another response from Andrew and reads, occasionally writing some things down in the margins of the papers with a pencil. Andrew waits for Matt to give the file back before reading what he’s written down, it’s just small things he noticed that even Andrew had overlooked. At least he’s not a useless detective, he has an eye for detail like Andrew and that’s something he can appreciate. Perhaps working with Matt won’t be that bad, but he wants to see what he’s like at an active crime scene before he makes a full judgement of his work ethic.

-

Turns out Andrew didn’t have to wait that long to see Matt at an active crime scene, because that same day at noon TB strikes again. TB is getting bolder by the day, because this time there is a witness. The victim’s daughter had survived the attack. She had been hiding in the closet and TB had found her, but he had let her live after taunting her. Renee is taking her statement at the police station already, meaning Matt and Andrew are stuck at the scene together. It’s less gruesome than the one from the day before, but it’s still not a pretty one. Andrew watches as Matt walks around and tells people to take pictures of evidence and collect samples. Andrew decides to leave him to it, and goes upstairs to see if he can find anything interesting. Neil follows him quietly, flying a bit above the ground.

“Got tired of walking?” Andrew asks as he turns into an empty room.

“Not really, but flying is more fun,” Neil shrugs.

Andrew doesn’t agree, but he doesn’t say anything. He focuses on looking for evidence left behind by TB when he came upstairs. If he is getting more reckless and bold, chances are he’s begun to leave more evidence behind too. Neil helps by looking over things. He can’t actually touch anything in the room so it’s not a lot of help, but Andrew thinks it’s Neil’s way of keeping busy. There is nothing in the room he is in now, so after a while he leaves and moves to the daughter’s room. There’s bloody footprints that had been tracked inside, stopping at the closet the girl hid in. There’s a meat cleaver that’s been left by TB in the corner of the room, but after a thorough investigation Andrew finds nothing else, not even in the other rooms. He returns downstairs, where he finds Matt talking to another detective. He turns to Andrew the moment he notices him coming down the stairs, though.

“Hey, did you find anything upstairs?”

Andrew nods and tells them the things he had found. It’s still not enough to tie anyone to the crime, so hopefully Renee will have more luck than them. He waits for Matt to finish talking to the detective, before gesturing for him to follow. He takes him to his car and they get in together, Andrew driving them back to the precinct.

“You think we’ll get a sketch?” Matt asks after a few minutes of silence.

Andrew only hums in response. He doesn’t know what to expect of the sketch, if it’ll give them a clear view of TB and what he looks like in real life. Andrew doesn’t really know what to expect from TB in the first place. He simply drives them to the precinct and goes to Wymack’s office to go over what they found. It’s a brief talk, but Wymack listens and makes notes the entire time. Andrew doesn’t have much to add about the evidence he found, so Matt does most of the talking. Neil once again sits somewhere in the back of the office looking completely bored out of his mind, but Andrew tries to keep his attention on the conversation and not let himself be distracted by the way the golden sunlight frames Neil’s dark skin and auburn curls around his face. When the talk is over, he simply turns and leaves, not waiting to see who follows. He clocks out and goes downstairs, where he unlocks his car and gets in. He only briefly waits for Neil to catch up, though he knows that Neil doesn’t necessarily needs to catch a ride with him anymore, considering he can just teleport and fly, but he likes having him in the car with him. Instead of Neil entering the car, it’s Matt who knocks on the window.

“Hey, I was wondering if you wanted to go for a drink tonight?” He asks when Andrew rolled the window down. Andrew is tempted to just say no, but for some reason, something in him compels him to agree.

“Sure, meet me by the Foxhole at 8, it shouldn’t be too far from your hotel,” Andrew says.

Matt beams a smile at him and leaves, revealing a smiling Neil behind him. Andrew rolls his eyes, starts the motor and drives off without letting Neil in.

-

The Foxhole is a bar that Kevin introduced Andrew to. He’s been going there for so long he knows all the bartenders by name. Roland is his favourite bartender. He was one of the few people who knew Andrew was into men, and they spent quite some time fooling around together. Before he had met Neil, they had a falling out and he hadn’t spoken to him for a long time after that, but when Neil died and Aaron was gone, Andrew needed familiar comfort and the two had drifted back to each other. Today he’s working as well and Andrew makes his way to the bar so he can wait for Matt. Roland finishes up with another customer, before making his way to Andrew. He detours slightly to make him a strong drink and slides it his way when he makes it there.

“That one is on the house. How’s stuff going?” Roland asks. Andrew doesn’t know why Roland always insists on making small talk, because Andrew cares very little for what goes on in Roland’s life outside of their hookups and being a bartender, and he isn’t about to share his life with him either. At least, that’s how he usually feels. Today he decides to indulge Roland though, because things have been weird lately anyway.

“Stuff’s going fine. Remember the TB case?”

Roland nods quietly and leans in a bit, giving him the privacy to say things he usually can’t talk about in public.

“It’s been reopened.”

“Well fuck. Didn’t they sentence a cop to death last year?”

Andrew nods as he takes a sip of his drink, but doesn’t add anything else. Roland only sticks around for a few seconds to see if Andrew will say anything else, then he moves on to helping other customers. There is only so much Andrew can legally tell Roland before getting into trouble, though, so when Roland comes back to refill his glass he doesn’t stir the conversation back to TB. They share some idle chitchat, but most of it comes from Roland. Finally Matt shows up to the bar a little before 8:30 and Andrew slides him a drink provided to him by Roland. Matt smiles and thanks him, before throwing it back like it’s nothing.

“Sorry I’m late, I was on the phone with my wife,” Matt says

Andrew doesn’t care much about his coworkers love life, so he doesn’t press on, but apparently Matt doesn’t need Andrew’s encouragement because he continues on like he never noticed the bored look on Andrew’s face.

“She’s a detective too, we actually met in Charleston. We were assigned a case together, but I was such a rookie. Her name is Dan, she’s really nice. I think you two would get along.”

Andrew just hums and sips on his whiskey. He doesn’t remember why he even agreed to seeing Matt in the first place. He’s already starting to feel bored again. He just waves Roland over for a new glass, who obediently refills it with whiskey. Matt orders himself another beer and they sip on their drinks in silence for a while. Andrew appreciates it, he didn’t invite Matt here to hear about his life story. That much he knows for sure.

“Do you think Neil forgives us?” Matt suddenly asks. It’s not the type of question Andrew had expected and for a second he feels dizzy and disoriented. Does Neil forgive them? He can’t help himself from looking for Neil’s face in the crowd. After two days he’s already used to being close with him all the time. Does Neil forgive them? Andrew ponders it over for a few seconds, thinks about Neil showing up at the precinct, thinks about Neil in his kitchen and his smile in the parking lot. He thinks about Neil’s warm hands on Andrew’s body, thinks of his lips pressed against his skin, hot breaths and whispers. He thinks about the spot of abundantly bright colours on his shoulder, and he knows Neil does forgive them. He turns to Matt and quietly nods, and it seems as though a weight has been lifted off of Matt’s shoulders as he smiles back at Andrew.

“We’ll catch that fucker. For Neil,” Matt says.

“For Neil,” Andrew agrees as he raises his whiskey glass. Matt clinks his beer against it and they both throw back the remainder of their drinks.

-

In the end Matt is too drunk to drive home, so Andrew throws him in the backseat of his car and takes him back to his place. Andrew drags him up to his apartment and shoves him into the guest room. When he returns to the living room he finds Neil sitting on the couch with an amused grin on his face.

“What?” Andrew snaps.

“Oh, nothing,” Neil muses.

Andrew rolls his eyes and disappears into the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee. Neil, as usual, quietly follows after him. Andrew ignores his presence for a minute or two, focusing on the coffee brewing in front of him, but eventually he has to turn for sugar and finds himself face to face with Neil.

“Someone was at your door today, they tried to break in.”

Andrew raises an eyebrow and waits for Neil to elaborate, but he doesn’t. They both already know it must be TB’s henchmen being sent after Andrew for being on the case again. Only this time they don’t have anyone to go after. Aaron is already dead, Nicky is in Germany with his soulmate Erik where they can’t get to him, and he’s not close enough with Katelyn for her death to have a significant meaning to him. TB, no doubt, knows all of this already. They’re trying to get through to him by pointless threats, but if they think Andrew can be intimidated by meaningless threats like this, they are wrong. TB already took two of the people he cared about the most. Andrew is past the point of worrying about other people he cares about that they can get to. He has arrived at the point of revenge, so let TB try to break in and threaten him all he want. It’ll only fuel his anger more. Neil looks at him with a look of understanding, before stealing Andrew’s cup of coffee and flying off with it.

“Give that back,” Andrew says boredly.

Neil takes a sip of it without another word, then makes a face at the sweetness of the coffee. He returns the coffee to Andrew and watches him as he takes a calm sip.

“Isn’t that way too sweet?” Neil asks, and Andrew shakes his head in response.

“How do you still have your teeth,” Neil teases.

“I use this thing called a toothbrush, you might want to try it sometime.”

Neil laughs, and Andrew leaves the kitchen, making his way to the living room. Neil doesn’t follow this time, so Andrew gets comfortable on the couch and lets Sir jump onto his legs. He purrs and makes himself comfortable, which is a complicated process that includes walking in 3 circles, moving further up and down Andrew’s legs before finally flopping down in the exact same position and exact same spot where the process began. Andrew rolls his eyes in some sort of attempt to come off as annoyed, but he doesn’t even manage to convince himself it’s real. He gently scratches Sir behind his ear and grabs a book he’d been reading earlier. He stays like that on the couch, reading his book and petting Sir, until he becomes tired and decides to go to bed. He still hasn’t seen Neil, and when he goes into the kitchen to turn the light off, Neil is nowhere to be found. He almost calls out to him when he realises Matt is in the guest room, and he doesn’t need him to start asking questions that he can’t answer without being seen as insane. Instead, he goes to see if he can find Neil in the apartment. He does eventually find him in the guest bedroom, looking at Matt who is fast asleep. When Andrew opens the door, Neil turns around and follows him out. Andrew closes the door quietly so he doesn’t wake Matt up and gestures for Neil to follow him to his bedroom. He doesn’t ask Neil what’s wrong, because he already understands that Neil misses his old life and friends. Instead he lets Neil lay with him in his bed, where he holds Neil close to his chest until they both fall asleep.

-

Andrew is woken up at 4 AM by the sound of gunshots outside of his window. He throws himself out of his bed just in time as bullets break the glass and it rains down on his bed. He curses loudly and tries to find his own gun, but the shots stopped as soon as they started. He hears footsteps from the roof of the apartment building across from his, and a door being thrown shut as the shooters leave. Then there is silence. The silence only lasts for a few seconds before sirens in the distance tell Andrew some cops are already on route to see what’s wrong. He quietly gets up from the floor, checking himself for injury and is satisfied to see he has none, before making his way to the guest room where he finds Matt on the floor as well. There is glass everywhere in his room, but Matt seems un-injured all the same.

“Morning,” Andrew says, making Matt laugh.

“Next time, let’s just set an alarm,” he says as he gets up from the floor. “Think that was TB?”

Andrew shrugs. “Maybe, or maybe someone I put away before. Either way, they were pissed off and wanted us to know.”

Matt shrugs and throws on his sweater from the day before and Andrew leaves the room to wait for the cops. He finds Neil in the living room, near a very distressed looking Sir. There is glass everywhere, but Andrew doesn’t care and makes his way over to the couch to take Sir into his arms. He holds the trembling cat, scratching him behind his ear and petting him gently until he stops trembling and starts purring ever so slightly. Andrew doesn’t let go of him yet though, just holds him like that until cops enter the apartment and he finally realises he’d stepped into multiple shards of glass.

“Jesus christ, Andrew. What the fuck happened here?” One of the responding officers, officer Johnson, asks.

“Someone was mad, but no one is hurt.”

“You’ve got glass in your foot, Andrew.” Smith makes her way to Andrew, and Andrew lets her inspect the damage.

“Got it from walking to the couch. Sir was distressed.”

“You and that cat… it looks bad. You better get this checked out.”

Andrew hums, but stays on the couch with Sir in his arms. The officers all know better than to ask him how he’s feeling, but Smith gives him a worried look either way. Smith is an older woman, already in her 40’s. She never made it to detective level, but Andrew thinks she’s quite alright. He’s made a few pitches to Wymack, but so far she is still stuck as an officer. After a while Matt comes into the living room, and after pictures have been taken he cleans the glass off the floor. Andrew doesn’t offer to help, just sits there and waits for someone to arrive that can take care of his feet which are finally starting to hurt. Officers keep coming in and leaving the room, asking Andrew questions he genuinely can not answer because he was asleep and the shooting only lasted a couple seconds at best. Matt doesn’t have much to add either, he can only say the harsh noise woke him up and made him jump out of bed and find shelter the same way Andrew did. When they’re done, paramedics finally arrive and Andrew is taken to a hospital to get his feet checked out. He worries briefly about Sir, but then he sees Neil standing in the door to the kitchen and he knows things will be fine.

-

Andrew is lucky enough to not have any significant damage done to his feet. He doesn’t even need stitches and he can just go back to work the following day, even though Wymack made it very clear he doesn’t want Andrew back at work or at his house for at least one day. Andrew nods like he is supposed to, but returns home all the same. There are people working on putting new windows in already, but Andrew cares more about finding Sir in the kitchen, hidden far away in a corner.

“Hey,” Andrew says softly, sitting down and keeping his distance, letting Sir come to him on his own accord. He watches him tremble in the corner and patiently waits, but Sir won’t come. Andrew stands up to make him food instead, putting the food halfway between him and Sir. He sits down again and waits. This time Sir moves to the food and begins to eat, while Andrew patiently waits for him to make his way to Andrew on his own accord. When he does, Andrew gently scratches him behind his ear.

“I won’t let that happen again,” He whispers as he picks Sir up, who immediately begins to purr again.

“That was TB, you know? He won’t warn you like that again.” Neil says from behind him.

“I don’t care. All of these bold statements will just make it easier for me to find him.”

Neil sighs, before joining him on the floor. He reaches out to Sir, who meows softly and pushes his head against Neil’s hand. Andrew watches, something in his chest making him feel a little lighter.

“What do you think their next step will be?”

Neil stays quiet for a bit, thinking it over as he scratches Sir under his chin. “Anything to get you off the case. Make it personal, probably.”

Andrew hums, but decides not to think about it for any longer. Instead, he takes Sir and Neil to his bedroom where they already fixed the windows and lets them join him on his bed as he reads his book.

-

In the end, Andrew still has to stay home for two days before Wymack finally calls him back to work. In those two days, Andrew had spent some time calling with Katelyn who had been complaining about feeling unwell. She thinks it is just early pregnancy symptoms, but Andrew could tell she hardly believed herself. He promised she could come over for dinner after work, which surprised even himself. He strongly disliked Katelyn ever since they met, but somehow, Aaron had brought them closer together in the end. He just wished he had been around to see it, but thinking about what could have been is far too depressing so early in the morning so Andrew pushes those thoughts deep down. Instead he rolls out of bed and puts on clean clothes. He moves to the kitchen where he feeds Sir and makes himself breakfast. Neil is nowhere to be seen today, so Andrew wastes no time in hanging around the apartment and goes to work. He is greeted by Matt waiting for him at the entrance of the precinct. Matt gestures to keep the car running and gets into it with him.

“Wymack wants us at a scene. Double murder,” he explains.

Andrew hums and drives off as Matt gives him the address. It’s pretty far away, near the end of the area their precinct falls under, but Andrew speeds the whole way there. The crime scene is an empty lot under a bridge, the first victim had clearly been killed somewhere else. They’d been killed the TB way, cut into pieces, and TB’s signature had been carved into the victims skin. The second victim was probably someone who was at the wrong place at the wrong time. They’d been shot multiple times, and they most likely died due to blood loss. Andrew is one of the first detectives on the scene with Matt, so they get to have the first look around. Andrew looks for any evidence to tie to TB, but finds nothing aside from the signature as usual. Their best bet is finding the spot the first victim had been killed, but if they’re already a part of the criminal world like the previous victims had been, chances are small they’ll find it. It’ll probably be cleaned and swept under the rug, leaving the police with almost no proof to find the victims identity. Andrew puts on some gloves to pick up a piece of meat, but before he can, Matt calls out to him.

“What is it?” Andrew walks over to Matt, who is looking over the unfortunate man’s corpse. He’s reaching into his pocket, and pulls out an envelope with Andrew’s name on it. Andrew quietly takes it from Matt, looking it over before he opens it. The handwriting both on the envelope and in the letter don’t look familiar to him.

_“Hello Detective Minyard,_

_How lovely to have you back at work so soon. We heard about the shooting that took place at your apartment, how awful some people are, no? Well, it is good to have you back so soon, we wouldn’t want anything else happening to you! Who else would chase so relentlessly after us?_

_Stay safe out there, some people are just plain horrible._

\- _TB”_

Andrew passes the letter back to Matt, who bags it as evidence. Matt looks like he wants to say something, maybe express concerns, but Andrew hardly cares so he returns to where he had been looking for evidence earlier. He can only ignore Matt for so long, though. Considering the crime scene is a dump site, there isn’t much they can gather from here, which means they have to drive back to the precinct soon. Andrew briefly considers leaving Matt to catch a ride with someone else, but clearly he had anticipated it, because he follows closely behind Andrew when they make their way to the car.

“This is getting too personal,” Matt says the moment they’re in the car. “Wymack will take you off the case again.”

Andrew ignores him, just turns the radio on and drives back without listening to a word that comes out of Matt’s mouth. Wymack can’t take him off the case, because Andrew is the only detective he has that stands a chance at catching TB.

At the precinct Andrew is called into Wymack’s office, where he slides the letter Andrew’s way. Andrew doesn’t read it, he still remembers what it says. He just looks back at Wymack until he eventually sighs and takes it back.

“This is a direct threat to your safety,” Wymack says.

“They want me off the case because they know I’ll catch them. Don’t give into their threats.”

Wymack sighs, turning the paper over as if expecting to see something on the back, but eventually he just puts it away again.

“If I think there is a threat to your safety, you’re off the case again. Take tomorrow off if you have to.”

Andrew only nods and waits to see if he wants something else, but when he doesn’t say anything, Andrew gets up and leaves the office again. He sits with Matt to read through the files and make a report of the crime scene. The rest of the day isn’t much more exciting than that. There is a surprising big amount of paperwork that goes into things like this, but when the day is over, Andrew takes his car and heads to the grocery store to get stuff for dinner. He can make pasta again, but he decides to make something a bit nicer for dinner with Katelyn. God, Aaron would be proud of him. He returns home as soon as he can, because it’s begun to rain and Katelyn won’t be able to get inside the building without a key to the front door. She used to have one, but the door had been replaced a few days prior when some guy had pulled it half of its hinges. When he gets there though, he finds her already standing outside. She looks like she’s crying. Andrew grabs the groceries and heads over to her.

“Hey,” he says. Katelyn doesn’t answer, so he unlocks the door and let’s her into the building. They make their way to his apartment, where he lets her in again. She sits on the couch without another word, and Andrew leaves to find her a blanket, a towel, and a clean set of clothes. He hands it all to her, she takes it and lays it quietly on her lap. She says nothing for a long time, and Andrew patiently waits in a chair across from her. Finally, she manages to drag her empty stare back to Andrew.

“I had a miscarriage… I lost the baby,” she whispers, voice hoarse.

Andrew doesn’t know what to say, the loss of Aaron’s child stings more than he had expected it to. The only thing he had left of Aaron is suddenly gone as well. Andrew finds himself so lost he can only sit there and look at Katelyn. He’s never been good at consoling others, especially not Katelyn. All he can think to do is head to the kitchen and pour her a glass of Whiskey. Katelyn accepts and throws it all back, so Andrew takes the bottle to the living room and together they drink until they’re both drunk. Katelyn starts to cry again, so Andrew pours her another drink until she stops. After that she heads to the showers and Andrew makes them simple noodles so they can eat together. When Katelyn comes out of the shower she gratefully accepts and eats with Andrew on the floor in the living room.

“Thanks. Honestly I needed this more than a hug,” she says as she takes a sip from the bottle. “It feels like I lost the last piece of Aaron I still had.”

Andrew only nods, having never been a man of many words, especially in situations like these, but Katelyn only smiles at him and nods back. “See, you get it… I… I think I’m just gonna sleep now. I’ll take your guest room.”

Andrew gets up and walks her there, giving her a good blanket and whatever else she needs. “I will have to work tomorrow, but you got Aaron’s old spare for my house right? Just let yourself out, and remind me to get you a new spare to the front door.”

Katelyn nods and curls up in bed, muttering a goodnight before falling asleep. Andrew briefly decides to clean, but then heads to bed as well. At night he dreams of losing Aaron all over again.

-

The following day Andrew returns to work, despite Wymack’s offer to take the day off if he felt like he needed it. He’s not going to let TB win, and he has important work to do. Besides, work will distract him from the news of Katelyn’s miscarriage. He still has a few files he has to sort through, and he’s planning on going through the few witness statements they have on all the murder cases they can assign to TB. Matt helps him out by taking half the pile of files and statements and together they run through them in silence. There isn’t anything that particularly stands out to Andrew in the witness statements, it’s mostly information they already know.

“Andrew Minyard?” A mailman approaches his desk, handing him a package. “Mail,” he says.

Andrew takes it without a word and the mailman leaves. He doesn’t recognise the handwriting, but he has a sneaking suspicion it’ll be from one of TB’s henchmen. He opens it, but has to stop when he realises what’s inside is a bomb.

“Holy fuck!” Matt jumps up, backing away from the package. The other detectives quickly follow his example, trying to get away from Andrew as fast as they can, but Andrew remains calm and puts the bomb down on his desk. Wymack comes out at the sound the others are making, and when he realises there is a bomb orders everyone to get out as fast as they can. Andrew grabs his TB files, before following after the other officers downstairs to the parking lot. Andrew pretends not to see Matt’s worried glances in his directions, having already made the same realisation as Andrew that this was another threat from TB. Judging by the look Wymack gave him on the way down, he had put two and two together already.

“Why hasn’t it gone o-“ Just in time, Matt is cut off by the bomb exploding. Glass shards fly everywhere, and Andrew pulls Matt behind a wall just in time as debris flies past. He hears screams of unfortunate colleagues who didn’t jump away in time, but Andrew tunes it out to listen to his racing heartbeat instead. From across the road he sees Neil staring back at them, clearly not understanding what happened either. Bombs don’t take that long to go off, there is a trigger system and it explodes the moment you set that off, but this bomb didn’t. It took it’s time, and Andrew has never seen anything like that before. When the ringing in his ears finally quiet down, he gets up and walks to the telephone booth. Most of the glass is destroyed by the force of the explosion, but the actual phone is still standing. He dials the numbers of the FBI, who they should report these type of things to, and waits. When they pick up on the 5th ring, Andrew doesn’t even give them the time to speak, and says, “You better come and see this. Colombia precinct 341,” before hanging up again.

In no time it’s swarming with men of the FBI, questioning all the officers and trying to see what they know. Andrew was right about the bomb being something he hadn’t seen before, at the end of the day they assume it might be something made by the Germans. In the end the press doesn’t get to report on it, and the explosion is written away as some freak accident involving boilers. If any of the detectives and officers ever speak about it to the public, there will be dire consequences. Andrew has to hand the files about TB in to the FBI, but he keeps a few of the more recent one and gives them to Matt. Matt looks confused and gestures at the guys of the FBI but Andrew shakes his head.

“Bring those to me later tonight,” he says.

Matt looks shocked, and Andrew thinks he might protest, but then he hides the files in his bag before being interrogated. Andrew turns away, only to find Wymack waiting for him. Andrew follows him to a quieter place, where it’s less packed with officers, concerned citizens that have begun to gather around and people of the FBI. He says nothing for a while, instead watches the destroyed precinct. He quietly looks up at the setting sun, before turning to Andrew again.

“Don’t get yourself in to too much trouble.” Is all he says, before waving Andrew away. Wymack knows Andrew won’t let this go as easily as the FBI want him to, but he also understands that he can’t stop him from doing this. All he can do is hope that Andrew makes it out alive from this showdown with TB.

Andrew doesn’t bother to stick around like some of the other officers do, wanting to see what will happen now. Andrew just takes his car and drives home. Katelyn had already left apparently, having left a note to thank him for helping her the night before. Andrew puts the note away and goes to sit in the living room with Sir and Neil in silence until Matt comes to bring the files. He doesn’t stay, but does tell Andrew that he will be going back to Charleston and makes him promise to stay in contact. Andrew actually promises to send him a letter and call him some time, before closing the door and throwing the files down on the floor to dig through. He needs more information on TB, needs to know where he can find him, when it dawns on him that Neil knows. All this time, all this time he could have just asked Neil. He turns to face him, but Neil is looking out of the window. He's keeping his distance from him and Sir, and he doesn’t say anything, not even when Andrew gets up and walks over to him.

“Neil-“

“You need to drop this. You need to stop going after him, before he kills you too,” Neil interrupts him.

“No. Tell me where to find him.”

“This won’t end well, you know? It’s time to quit!”

Andrew only glares at Neil, because he won’t drop this. TB took Neil and Aaron away from him, and Andrew refuses to let him win. Neil glares back, unwilling to give his answers to Andrew, but they both know it won’t end this way. Andrew won’t back down, and in the end Neil will. They stand like that for what feels like an hour, but Andrew knows that in reality it’s only 10 minutes at best, before neil relents and gives him the address of where TB is staying these days. Andrew writes it down on his hand, before taking the files on TB and burning them in the fireplace. Neil quietly watches him do it, before disappearing. Andrew knows he’ll be back soon, so he goes to his bedroom to get changed. He takes a simple black shirt and pants, something that won’t stand out too much, then he takes his keys, and walks over to the phone. He dials Katelyn’s number from memory, and waits for her to pick up.

“Katelyn Minyard, how can I help you?” her tired voice greets him on the 5th ring.

“Katelyn, I need you to watch over Sir for me tonight. I have some work to take care of, and I don’t think I’ll be back in time to feed him tomorrow.”

“I uh- Yeah, okay. I’ll be there as soon as possible.”

“I’ll be gone for work already by then. I’ll tell the downstairs neighbour to let you into the building. See you,” he says before hanging up.

Sir walks over and rubs his head against Andrew’s ankles, almost as if he’s trying to ask Andrew to stay. He relents for only a few minutes, giving Sir a few good scratches before grabbing his gun and leaving. He looks back only once to see if Neil is there, but he doesn’t show his face. Andrew feels something heavy in his chest, almost regret or guilt, but he pushes it down as far as he can. He has to do this. If Neil is hurt he can make up for it when he finds him again. For now he has to let it go, has to focus on what is in front of him. TB is going to regret ever making Andrew his enemy. He gets into his car and drives off to the address Neil gave him. When he arrives he finds himself in front of a gated community, but as he approaches the gate, it slides open for him. They were expecting him. He stops in front of a big house and gets out of the car, walking towards the front door. The lights are all on inside, casting the driveway in bright yellow lightning. Despite the brightness, Andrew fails to notice two of TB’s henchmen until they are wrestling him to the floor. Andrew tries to fight, tries to reach for his gun, but one of them puts a rag over his mouth and the fumes that come off of it make Andrew dizzy. He tries to stop himself from breathing, but when the men notice they kick him in the ribs and on impulse he gasps for air. His struggling only lasts for a few more seconds before darkness overcomes his vision and his body goes limp.

-

When Andrew wakes up he finds himself in a dark basement, the only light comes from a lamp in the middle of the room. It’s illuminating a table of tools that Andrew can only assume are placed there to scare him off, but Andrew isn’t afraid. He’s been taken directly to TB, so all he has to do is escape his bonds and then he can finish what they started. There is no one in the room with him, so he gives his handcuffs a careful tug. They cut into his skin, and he knows he can't escape them without either breaking the chain or finding a bobby pin. Breaking the chain without being able to see it isn’t an option, though, so he has to settle for trying to see if he can get a hold on something small to unlock the handcuffs with. There is something of the size on the table with tools, and one experimental hop tells him he can indeed move his chair around, but it’s best to wait until after his captors come in. He can’t alert them of his attempts to escape, not yet anyway. He suspects they’ll be here any second, and he is proven right when the door opens not even a minute later.

“Hello, detective Minyard. Such a shame to see you here,” a guy approaches him. He’s a short east-asian guy, but he carries himself with a sense of authority that tells Andrew he is high up in TB’s command. “TB couldn’t join us tonight sadly. I’m sure you don’t mind though, yeah?”

Andrew doesn’t answer, just looks blankly ahead at him.

“My name is Riko Moriyama,” he continues, with an air of complacence to his voice, as if Andrew is a stranger that he got caught up with in the rain. “I can tell you my name, because I know you won’t get out of here alive.”

He takes a knife off of the table and climbs on Andrew’s lap, calmly pressing the knife to his face, just hard enough for it to hurt but not to cut skin. He leans in close to Andrew’s face and smiles as he makes a small cut, it won’t scar, it’s meant to hurt and not to maim, at least for now. Riko looks at Andrew’s unimpressed expressions and laughs, before leaning in close to his ear

“My, you don’t care at all, do you?” He whispers. When Andrew doesn’t answer, he takes the knife and stabs Andrew in his leg. He twists his leg in response, a grimace on his face as he feels a hot white pain shooting up his leg. Riko takes out the knife and moves to make deep cuts on his legs. Andrew tries not to twitch, but fails every now and again. “You should care, Andrew. You should care, because it might make your death less painful.”

When Andrew once again doesn’t respond, Riko punches him in the face. His nose instantly begins to bleed, but Andrew knows it’s not broken. There is a dull ache that tells him Riko just threw the right punch by sheer luck, but Riko seems satisfied with the sight of more blood.

“Maybe that will make you talk?” He hums, before getting off his lap and starting to beat Andrew. He lands punches wherever he can, his ribs and face endure the most, and his whole body aches and throbs with dull pain by the time Riko is done. He wheezes, the pain in his ribs—which are most likely broken—making breathing harder. He ignores it all, tries to focus on keeping his breathing even, trying to stay awake. Passing out now means the end, if he passes out now Riko will maim him beyond the point of Andrew being able to run. Riko stands in front of him, looking him up and down, before taking the knife and cutting open Andrew’s already destroyed shirt. He runs his hands over the wounds and red spots that will soon begin to form bruises. He finds the soulmate mark, and his eyes widen slightly in surprise. A sly smirk spreads on his face as he cuts into it, destroying it and colouring it with blood until Andrew can’t even see the mark anymore.

“Ah, so that’s why you came after TB. Nathaniel was your soulmate, wasn’t he? You’re not the first to go after us for hurting their soulmate. Jean wasn’t very fond of us either after we took care of his. He didn’t do as well as you did during the torture though. I do hope you don’t die as easily as he did,” he says with a sick smile on his face.

Andrew responds by spitting blood in Riko’s face, but he just wipes it off and laughs. “I’ll be right back, wait for me?”

Andrew watches him go, hears him lock the door, and decides now is as good a time as any. He makes his way over to the table with equipment, it takes some time because he has to somehow move the chair without alerting Riko. It doesn’t help that his legs have been cut and stabbed. Every move he makes sends a new wave of white hot pain up and down his legs, but adrenaline and desperation make for one hell of a pain killer, so Andrew moves until he makes his way to the table. He kicks it over and throws himself next to the discarded tools, searching with his hands until he finds the narrow metal tool. Unlocking the handcuffs is a difficult process, but Andrew manages after a while. He grabs one of the sharp tools and waits by the door. 

Riko returns fast, and when he opens the door Andrew blindly stabs wherever he can, until Riko’s limp body falls to the floor with a wet slap, blood pooling around the corpse at a quick rate. Andrew doesn’t stay to watch, instead he steals the gun Riko took along and runs. There is no one stopping him until he finds stairs that lead upstairs, he runs and bursts through a door, finding two other men playing a card game. Andrew doesn’t think, just aims and shoots before running away again. He doesn’t turn to watch if they’re dead, or if he hit them at all, he just runs until he finds the front door of the warehouse they were in and then he throws the doors open and he is outside in the pouring rain. 

The sun is rising over the horizon, but Andrew doesn’t stay to watch, instead he turns and runs into the forest behind them. He runs and runs until he finds a cliff, where exhaustion and pain finally catch up with him and he collapses to his knees on the floor. Every breath he takes tears him open, his throat is raw and his legs shake when he tries to stand. He can’t go much further, but he knows staying here means TB will get his hands on him.

“I told you not to go, they won’t stop chasing you until they kill you,” Neil’s voice says behind him. Andrew turns, and holds out a hand to Neil, which he takes. He sits in front of him and cups his face in his hands, wiping at blood and… tears? Andrew didn’t realise he had even begun to cry, but here he is. He isn’t scared, not anymore. Neil is here and he’ll keep him safe.

“If I die, will I see you again?” Andrew whispers.

“Always. I’ll come back to you,” Neil whispers back, a promise, a truth. Andrew knows to trust Neil, so he gets up, his legs threatening to give out under him as he walks to the cliff’s edge. Neil follows him, reaches out a hand that Andrew quietly takes into his.

“I won’t leave you,” Neil promises. “I’ll be with you the whole way.”

So Andrew jumps, and Neil jumps after him. His hand is a comforting presence all the way down.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HA I fooled you into thinking Andrew was going to survive. Anyway, this fic isn't tagged happy ending & reincarnation for nothing! Up next is the "current" time line. So keep an eye out for next week!


	4. 2020 part one

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Damn new chapter time! New time line.... time?

The sound of an alarm wakes Andrew from a dreamless sleep. He rolls over and fumbles for his phone to turn the harsh beeping off, and is subsequently rewarded with silence. The only sounds he hears is that of cars driving past outside of his window and construction on the new apartment building down the street. He turns to his other side, clutching his blanket tighter around himself. He closes his eyes and without meaning to, he dozes off again.

Five minutes later, his alarm goes off again. This time, Andrew actually sits up to turn it off. He takes his phone from his nightstand and browses through it, checking some messages he’d gotten while asleep. The only one he really cares about is from his cousin Nicky, telling him he landed safely back in Germany and is back home with his husband Erik and Raphael, their four months old baby. Nicky had been upset he couldn’t take Raphael to America yet, but he had taken plenty of pictures to show. Andrew feigned indifference as usual, but he felt glad that Nicky was doing so well. He wasn’t surprised by Nicky announcing he and Erik had adopted a child, he’d always had the nursing instinct.

He looks at the picture Nicky made of himself, Erik, and Raphael to show him he’s back and saves it to his phone. He responds with a, “Good.” before putting his phone away again, just in time for his roommate's alarm to go off.

Andrew met Neil Josten a week before he came to work as a lawyer for the DA. He’d been drinking at the bar when Neil asked if the seat next to him was taken. Andrew would usually tell a stranger to just fuck off, but when he turned to Neil he had decided to let him join. He doesn’t know what prompted him to let Neil sit with him, but something about him had been different. Andrew couldn’t really describe it in any way other than some gut feeling telling him he had to accept, so he did. At first, Andrew could barely stand the guy when they were at work, but after weeks of exposure from working together over a murder case, he grew to tolerate him. Neil moving in wasn’t exactly supposed to happen, but when Neil got a notice that he would be kicked out because they were tearing his building down, Andrew reluctantly offered. He wasn’t that shocked when Neil agreed, he had known Neil would even before he offered to let him move in. At first it was a struggle to get used to each other, but slowly they manage to start working around each other. Andrew still remembers those days where they were just getting used to living together, and his memories take him back to a particular summer day a year ago.

_t was still incredibly warm when Neil and Andrew returned late from work, so Andrew opened the door to the balcony and got them a case of beers. Neil grabbed the chairs and put them down, before disappearing back inside to get changed into something more comfortable. Andrew had noticed since moving in that Neil’s sense of fashion is, well, lacking completely. It’s really a miracle he even managed to pick a suit for work that didn’t look like trash. Andrew had decided to make up for it by throwing out everything he hated from his closet, and replacing it with better looking clothes. Neil had responded to it about as well as Andrew had expected him to, which wasn’t well at all. He had come back from the bedroom with one of the new shirts Andrew had bought for him, waving it in his face, telling him to stay the fuck out of his stuff. Andrew had only calmly pointed out that his old clothes were in a bag by the front door. Neil had taken the bag and had taken it back to his bedroom. At first he had gone back to wearing his old clothes, but slowly began to mix in Andrew’s new choice of clothes until he started wearing outfits that at least bordered on semi-acceptable._

_Neil came out in a pair of his old faded jorts and an old shirt. He grabbed Andrew’s pack of cigarettes and joined him outside where Andrew was already waiting. Despite the summer heat, the only thing he had done was simply unbutton his shirt. He caught Neil sneaking a glance, but he hadn’t said anything as he sat down and handed Neil his beer._

_“Thank you,” Neil said, before lighting a cigarette and handing it to Andrew._

_He didn’t remember exactly when moving around Neil had become so easy, when they began to understand what the other wanted or needed without verbalising the thought out loud. He took a drag from his cigarette, slowly blowing the smoke away from Neil, when Neil reached for the cigarette and stole it. Andrew responded by stealing his beer and taking a calm sip of it, and Neil only smiled back at him._

_“Sometimes it feels like I’ve known you before,” Andrew had said. The words were out before he could stop himself, and Neil smiled in a way that told Andrew he knew something he didn’t. He took a long drag from the cigarette, slowly exhaling the smoke, and said, “Maybe you did.”_

_It made Andrew feel something he hadn’t felt in a long time. The only way he knew how to deal with it back then was by pushing it down as far as it could go while taking another sip from Neil’s beer_

To this day, Andrew still doesn’t understand what Neil could have meant when he’d said they might have met before, still doesn’t understand the implication of that smile, but he had stopped trying to figure it out. For now, he should focus on getting out of bed and making his way to the kitchen.

It’s August, the weather is still nice out, and Neil and Andrew were ready to return to work. They hadn’t actually gone anywhere for their break, instead choosing to stay at home with their two cats, Sir fat cat McCatterson and King Flufkins. Sir already lived with Andrew, but Neil brought King with him when he moved here. The two immediately became best friends, and they often found them napping together. This morning is no different. Sir and King are napping in the early morning sun. Andrew resists the urge to reach out and pet them, not wanting to wake them just yet. Instead he goes to his kitchen to make himself some breakfast. Neil walks into the kitchen not shortly after that, grabbing some yoghurt from the fridge, putting some cut strawberries in it. When he reaches past Andrew for a spoon, his eyes briefly land on the black hand-shaped stain on Neil’s forearm. Neil thinks very similar to Andrew when it comes to soulmates. Neither of them seem to have a sense of urgency to find their “other half”. Andrew never understood how someone could be your missing half, anyway. In all those years he had been alone he never felt like half of him was missing. Andrew was complete, whether he was with someone or not made no difference. His own soulmate mark is on his neck, a handprint like Neil’s mark. He has no desire to find out who his soulmate is. He never speaks of the mark like others do.

“Excited for work?” Neil asks.

Andrew hums in response and Neil smiles faintly at him as he leaves the kitchen, leaving Andrew to cook his breakfast pancakes. He grabs syrup and sugar and joins Neil in the living room to eat. Neil watches him drown his pancakes in syrup and then put sugar on it as well. He makes a face, but says nothing. Neil had only argued once that he should eat healthier, and Andrew’s response was to stock the freezer with ice cream. Neil realised it was a lost cause, so he stopped trying all together.

Andrew eats his pancakes while watching the news with Neil, and they drive off to work after. They spend the drive in moderate silence, Neil only occasionally making comments about things he sees as they drive into town. Andrew drops Neil off at the DA’s office, then drives to the precinct. He is greeted by his boss, David Wymack, dropping a bunch of files on his desk, telling him to go over them. Andrew takes them without a word, opening the first file and allowing himself to get lost in the words.

By the time he’s halfway through, Kevin plops down at the desk opposite of him. Andrew greets him with a short nod, and Kevin hums in response. Kevin takes one of the files and briefly looks through them, before handing them back.

“Making corrections?”

“Your work sucks, Day.”

Kevin gives him one of his rare true smiles, before grabbing his own files and going through them. Kevin and Andrew have been work partners for a very long time, but friends for even longer. Most of the time when Kevin was called to a scene, Andrew would be there too. Kevin had an eye for detail that Andrew could appreciate, making him one of the few people he could appreciate working with. Kevin was also a great opponent in a game of poker, though he had yet to beat Andrew. If his cousin Nicky saw him playing card games with a coworker, he would probably call him an old man, but Nicky was in Germany with his soulmate Erik. He didn’t have to know what Andrew was up to these days, though he did call with him almost weekly to catch him up on what he was doing if he could make time for it. He would just never tell him about the card games with Kevin. Neil occasionally joins, but he always loses to Kevin no matter what game they play. Neil can only beat them in Uno, but Andrew is convinced Neil cheats, so he doesn’t count them to Neil’s disagreement.

Kevin looks up from one of his files, looks around the office, then leans in close to Andrew.

“You heard about that string of murders? You worked them before your break. They think it’s a serial killer,” Kevin whispers.

“Do they now?” Andrew doesn’t look up from his files, but Kevin knows he has his undivided attention, so he continues.

“Yeah, they started calling him The Butcher.”

Andrew frowns, something deep down tells him he heard that name before, but he can’t say for sure. His usually perfect memory fails him now. He only comes up blank with a gut feeling that this isn’t an unfamiliar suspect.

“I see,” is all Andrew says.

“Supposedly Captain Wymack wants to talk with you about it, today.”

Andrew looks up at Kevin, but he has leant back into his chair to look through his own files, so Andrew returns to his own work.

Kevin was right. Half an hour before Andrew’s break, Wymack calls Andrew into his office. Aaron, his twin brother, shows up not shortly after that. Aaron is the medical examiner working for their department. Andrew got him the job after he found out Aaron had relapsed back into drugs and lost his job at the hospital. Andrew had promised that if Aaron could stop using drugs he would pay for his required classes to become a coroner. Aaron had accepted, Andrew had asked Wymack, and Aaron had gotten a job training under their old M.E., Alina Afridi, who was a few years away from retirement. In combination of being trained by Alina and following the extra classes to actually become an M.E., Aaron had turned out to be a fine one. Alina retired early, trusting Aaron to take care of it himself.

Now Aaron looks lost as he sits down next to Andrew, looking between him and Wymack to see if they will give a hint to what this will be about. Andrew knows, but his face betrays nothing. Wymack looks for a file, then plops a coroner’s report down on the table. Aaron takes it, quietly looking through it. When he finishes it, Wymack tosses him another report, then another, and another, and another, until Aaron is pale and sweating.

“Would you say these have similarities?” Wymack finally asks.

“Jesus fuck, I thought I fucked something up. Can you ask me normally next time?” Aaron curses, before taking quick glances through the reports again. “Yeah, there’s similarities. Similar causes of death, some similar wounds. Could be the same guy.”

Wymack hums. He digs through his desk again and starts handing files to Andrew. He looks through them, but doesn’t have to ask to know they’re the same case files as the coroners reports Wymack had given to Aaron. He reads through them, but comes to the same conclusion.

“Same guy,” Andrew says, putting the files away.

“Then how come no one caught on to it yet?”

Andrew shrugs, the deaths aren’t exactly standard murders either. Most victims had their limbs cut off and placed somewhere else on the scene. The victims were all women in their 20’s or 30’s, with seemingly no prior history with each other. They were random murders with similar victims, but somehow no one caught on to the pattern. Andrew doesn’t understand why he didn’t catch on either, all of these cases had been his, but his memory seems to come up empty, as if it had been reset.

“No idea,” is all Andrew can say to Wymack.

“Well whatever, it’s happened now. Kevin made the connection, so I’ll put you two on the case. I told the other precincts that if they find a body that fits The Butcher’s murder method, they’ll send the files to you. You’re the Medical Examiner for this case, Aaron. If you need help, let us know. We’ll need to catch them soon, we can’t afford for them to keep murdering for much longer. I asked the DA to assign Neil to this case, so you can catch him up after your break. Off you two go, now.”

Andrew and Aaron don’t need to be told twice, so Andrew leaves and takes Kevin to get some lunch from their favourite take-out place near the precinct. Kevin waits for Andrew to say something regarding the talk he had in Wymack’s office, but Andrew keeps quiet, so Kevin talks about some sports game he watched on TV the other day. Andrew listens, not because he cares about the sport or the outcome, but because it matters to Kevin. Kevin talks about the game and other things Andrew missed out on during his break and Andrew allows himself to join in with the idle chatter he usually cares very little for.

-

When they return from their break, they are immediately told to go to an active crime scene. Aaron is dragged from out of the morgue to accompany them, leaving no doubt that the victim is likely one of The Butcher’s. Andrew piles the three of them in his car and drives them to the crime scene.

The crime scene is in a dorm complex of a nearby college. The parking lot is filled with students. Some of them are crying, but Andrew can’t say whether they were friends of the victim or not. He turns away from the crowd to let Kevin and Aaron out of his car. Everything Aaron needs to examine the body was taken to the scene by someone else, so all he has to do is get changed into a special suit so he won’t accidentally drop any DNA on the scene, take his stuff, and guide Andrew and Kevin to the scene. The responding officers at the front door tell them to head to the fourth floor, so they take the elevator up. Aaron walks ahead of them down the hallway, where some of the doors are open. A group of girls are sitting in one of the rooms. They are all talking to officers, giving their statements of what occurred and what they had witnessed. The crime scene is in a dorm room all the way in the back of the long hallway. There are officers standing guard to make sure no one goes inside.

“Detectives,” one of them says, giving a quick nod in lieu of a greeting.

Andrew gestures for Aaron to go inside before him, so he steps into the room. They are not allowed to touch the body before Aaron has finished giving it a quick examination on scene, so Andrew and Kevin enter the room but stay close to the door to give Aaron space. The victims are two women in their early 20’s, killed in The Butcher’s signature way. The floor is covered in blood, which has soaked into the carpet in a way that won’t ever come out. Andrew wouldn’t be surprised if the blood had seeped into the flooring under it, but he can’t say without tearing the carpet away.

Aaron approaches the first corpse, looking it over and making notes.

“Seems to me like they died of blood loss as a result of extended torture. I’ll need to look them over at the precinct to be sure, but I don’t think it’s anything else.” He gets up and turns to the second corpse, looking her over as well.

“This girl seems to have some blunt force trauma to the head, though. I can’t say for sure if it's the cause of death yet.” Aaron gets down on the floor, looking closer at the girl’s head.

“So you pronounce them dead?” Kevin asked.

“Yes, they’re dead. You can investigate now,” Aaron said, stepping back from the corpses.

Andrew and Kevin step further inside the dorm room and Aaron returns outside to speak with the other officers and give his verdict. Andrew and Kevin both take a side of the room, looking for evidence of who could have done this. It’s Kevin who first finds a bunch of hairs, calling Andrew over to inspect it as well.

“The Butcher’s?” Kevin asks.

Andrew shrugs, getting out a little bag so they can take it back. “Maybe, or from a friend or roommate. Did these two live here together or did they have a third roommate?”

“Just the two of them, boyfriend called the murder in this morning. He says nothing was stolen, so we can rule out a robbery gone wrong.”

Andrew nods and returns to his side of the dorm. He does end up finding a few sets of fingerprints, but he has a feeling most are from the girls living in the room. The Butcher had never left prints before, and there are no signs of them getting reckless yet. Sometimes, if a killer goes unnoticed for a long time they start to get reckless. They either think they are above the law, or they want the attention, the thrill of the chase. The Butcher seems content with just killing, they have gone unnoticed for months. Andrew wonders how they will act now that the police caught on.

“Do you think one of them managed to scratch the culprit?” Kevin asks, standing by one of the girls arms.

“You wanna check?”

Kevin nods, so Andrew goes to find Aaron. He’s still standing outside, talking to a few other officers about the scene inside, but they turn to Andrew when he steps out of the dorm room.

“You got a DNA sample kit? We want to see if we can find DNA under the girls’ fingernails.”

Aaron nods, going to his bag to take out a few sample kits, then follows him inside to help him swab the fingernails for DNA. Andrew lets Kevin and Aaron do it, then lets Aaron collect the samples.

“I’ll get these sent to the lab. You guys done here?”

Kevin looks at Andrew, who nods. Aaron walks off to another officer to give him the samples while Kevin and Andrew take off their gloves and shoe covers outside of the crime scene. Andrew turns to leave, but is stopped by another officer.

“Can you talk to one of the witnesses? He’s one of the victims’ boyfriends, but he seems reluctant to talk,” The officers says.

Andrew usually doesn’t talk to witnesses. If he talks to anyone it’s usually suspects, because no matter how intimidating a suspect thinks they are, Andrew is never phased. He’s coaxed the most confessions out of suspects out of all the people in the precinct, but witness confessions are not his thing. Still, if they ask, it must be serious, so Andrew relents and follows the officer to another dorm room. There is a guy sitting on a chair, anxiously bouncing his leg up and down. Andrew eyes him, watches the way his fingers twitch, and immediately draws the conclusion the kid needs a cigarette. He reaches for his own pack, takes one out and tosses it to the kid.

“You got a lighter or do you need mine?” Andrew asks.

“We can’t smoke in the building,” the kid whispers.

“Cops are already here, what are they gonna do? Call again?”

The kid lets out a weak laugh, grabs his own lighter and lights the cigarette. Andrew briefly considers lighting his own, but there are only so many rules he can break so he decides against it. He lets the kid smoke in silence, having him distracted is good because he can take out a note pad so he can write things down. The guy looks out of the window as he smokes, and Andrew looks for a smoke detector. He realises there are none and scoffs. That’s a serious safety regulation they should fix. His own dorm room had a smoke detector, but he broke it so he could smoke inside, so he supposes he doesn’t really have much of a right to complain about it.

“She wanted me to stop smoking… I really tried, but I picked it up again. I think she knew that, though,” the kid says.

Andrew hums, he doesn’t care for his personal life. He doesn’t care much for his heartbreak. The only thing he cares about is catching the guy who did this.

“It’s.. I just can’t believe I won’t ever see her again,” He whispers, his voice hoarse.

“I understand. It’s hard, but the least you can do is talk to us and help us catch the fucker who did this, no?”

Andrew watches him. The kid looks composed, but Andrew has learned the tell tale signs of anxiety. The kid is sweating, he’s avoiding eye contact. He’s scared.

“You’re not a suspect, kid. We already have one in mind,” Andrew says boredly.

“How did you-“ He begins, but Andrew interrupts him.

“Sweating, avoiding eye contact, the tapping of your fingers before I gave you a cigarette. You were clearly afraid. People often suspect the one closest to the victim, but this wasn’t a murder out of disagreement. This was a murder out of passion. If your girlfriend cheats on you, you don’t tear her limbs apart and take her roommate too.”

“R-.. Right… She didn’t- She didn’t cheat on me, though… Did she?”

“How would I know that? I don’t know any of you, I’m just here to do my job. To be frank, I couldn’t care less if she did.”

The kid nods quietly, staring back at the window.

“Can I take your statement now? You’re slowing me down.”

The kid nods again, so Andrew sits down opposite of him.

“What’s your name, kid?”

“Adam Gaal, sir,” He says.

“Alright, tell me how you found the victim.”

Adam nods quietly, tapping his fingers on his desk again as he tries to remember.

“It.. Today was our anniversary, and I was supposed to pick Tyla up from her dorm and take her to the movie theatre. We were going to watch.. some movie? She was going to pick… A-Anyway, I went to her dorm and no one opened up, and I thought that was weird because she is always up early. I tried calling her, but she didn’t answer, so I called Stephany. That’s- uh, that’s her roommate, and I heard her phone ringing inside and I got scared because well.. Stephany is a really light sleeper, so I kicked the door in and I- I-“ Adam stops and begins to cry. Andrew reaches out, placing a hand on his shoulder. He hates offering support, hates doing confessions, but forces himself to offer this kid some support. The earlier he begins to talk, the better.

“I found them there! Both of them dea-dead! Dead and oh god, oh god it was so awful. I just- I just remember screaming and then I passed out… That’s- That’s all.”

Andrew nods quietly, writing down what he said.

“Did she ever tell you about someone following her? Did she or her roommate feel threatened in the weeks leading up to her death?”

Adam quietly shakes his head, but then gasps. “No, wait! There was this one guy who followed her to the mall. I scared him away, but Stephany told me she saw him following her too a few days before she-“

Andrew waits for him to continue, but he doesn’t.

“When was this?”

“Tyla was a month ago, Stephany was a week before today.”

“What did he look like?”

“Uhm, smaller than average… A white guy, I think he was somewhere between forty and fifty. Auburn hair, blue eyes.. Uhm, do you need anything else?”

“Wrinkly face, sharp jawline, scars, tattoos, soulmate mark, anything that would make him stand out?”

“No… Though, I- well, I’m not sure, but I think he had a scar on his left hand… Like, a long thin line running between his thumb down to the wrist on the back of his hand…”

“Thank you. Would you be willing to meet up with an officer to make a sketch of the man?”

“Yes, of course.”

Andrew puts his stuff away and gestures for Adam to follow him. He takes him to another officer, who will bring him to the office before meeting up with Kevin again. Aaron had gone back to the crime scene so he could help with taking the bodies back. Kevin looks at Andrew, raising an eyebrow to ask how things went, but Andrew gets into the car and drives off without another word.

-

After work Andrew drives to the DA’s office to pick Neil up. Neil is standing by the gate, looking on his phone as he waits for Andrew

“Get in loser we’re going shopping,” Andrew says

Neil looks up from his phone and rolls his eyes in a semi-fond way that Andrew doesn’t believe for a second.

“We’re not actually going shopping, are we?”

Andrew doesn’t respond, just turns the music on higher and drives off. Neil had made it quite known that he didn’t like shopping with Andrew before, mostly because Andrew keeps criticising everything Neil tries to get. Andrew had eventually relented and had agreed to stop going with Neil. Surprisingly, after Andrew stopped coming along not only did Neil’s style improve, but he also began to ask for Andrew’s opinions on the clothes he bought. The outfit he was wearing to work right now was one of Andrew’s favourites, though he wouldn’t say so out loud. It was a nice suit, but Neil had gotten it tailored after Andrew recommended it. It fits Neil very well, and Neil wears it to work quite often.

“How was work?” Andrew asks.

“Alright, making some small progressions on that murder case. I think I’ll be able to convince the jury.”

“You got the news on The Butcher?” Andrew asks, studying Neil out of the corner of his eye for a second.

Neil tenses up and turns away from Andrew, avoiding eye contact. It’s only there for a brief second, but it’s long enough for Andrew to catch. Neil is nervous, but Andrew can’t tell why. Neil doesn’t have many friends, and The Butcher likely won’t go after a lawyer or a cop. He’s a serial killer, but the department doubts he has serious connections to cause them any concern, and yet Neil is nervous. He’s worried about something, and Andrew will find out what.

“I did. Wymack wants me to work the case as a lawyer.”

Andrew nodded, but said nothing else about it. They were almost home, so Andrew focused on the road for the rest of the ride.

At home Andrew disappears into the kitchen to make them dinner, while Neil wanders off to get changed out of his suit. For tonight, Andrew decided to make pasta with tuna in it. He checks the fridge for what he needs, and finds he has everything in stock. Cutting all the vegetables up only takes a few minutes, so before he does he puts some water up to boil. While he’s filling a pan with hot water out of the faucet, Neil enters the kitchen in a pair of sweats and a hoodie to watch him cook. Neil does that a lot, because he can’t actually cook himself. Andrew found this out the hard way, when he woke up to a fire in the kitchen that Neil was desperately trying to put out. Andrew had managed to put it out before it got out of hand, but Neil had been permanently banned from cooking and baking ever since. Sometimes he’ll let Neil help, though, and since Neil is already here he tells him to cut the mushrooms. While Neil does that, he cuts the bell peppers and olives.

“Are you going to add spring onions tonight?” Neil asks.

“Do you want me to?”

Neil nods, so Andrew gestures for him to grab some and cut them up. Andrew has no idea why Neil likes spring onions so much, but he always wants to add it into dishes when he tries to help Andrew with cooking. Sometimes Andrew has to tell him off because it won’t fit the recipe, and Neil will get sort of upset about it. Neil also strongly dislikes the majority of vegetables, so more often than not Andrew ends up throwing them in anyway.

While they cut their vegetables, the water begins to boil and Andrew dumps some butterfly pasta in the pan. Neil watches him closely, so Andrew gently tosses a small bell pepper piece at his face. Neil catches it and eats it, causing Andrew to roll his eyes at him. He moves past Neil to grab some sunflower oil, tosses some in a pan, and starts to heat it up. While that’s busy, he grabs two tuna cans and opens them.

“How do you know the oil is done?”

“I wet my hands and then toss a few drops in. If it sizzles it’s done.”

Neil watches as Andrew runs his hand under the faucet for a few seconds, then flicks his hand in the direction of the pan. A few drops of water land in the oil and it starts to sizzle, oil and water flying out of the pan slightly. It might not be the most convenient way to figure out if oil is done, but it’s how Nicky taught it to him and Aaron, back when they could hardly get along. The only thing the twins had in common back then was that neither could cook, and Nicky was desperate to teach them and have them bond over something, <i>anything<i> really. It worked, though. Aaron still frequently sends Andrew new recipes he finds online, and Andrew will try them the same day and rate them. It’s kind of fun to do.

Andrew drains the tuna cans until there is no more water left inside, before throwing it into the pan. He waits for it to cook brown, then throws in the vegetables. At the very last he throws in the olives, then drains the pasta and adds it to the rest and throws in some red sauce. After mixing it he puts some in two bowls for him and Neil.

“Thanks,” Neil says, taking the plate from Andrew.

Andrew gestures for him to keep moving to the living room so they can eat, and follows him out with a plate of his own. They sit together on the couch, and Neil throws his legs over Andrew’s. Andrew rolls his eyes but doesn’t push Neil away. He turns on an episode of Queer Eye and relaxs back into the couch, eating his pasta in silence with Neil. Something in Andrew tells him not to bring up The Butcher, to just enjoy this quiet moment with Neil. Unfortunately though, Andrew has always been a true instigator at heart, so he turns to Neil and with a sense of casualty to him that is completely faked, he says, “What do you know about The Butcher so far?”

Andrew catches the way Neil shifts in his lap, how his eyes dart between Andrew and the door no matter how much he tries to hide it. He has the look of a man who has all exits of the building mapped in his mind, but when he answers his voice is steady and calm.

“Not much, they are making a sketch right?”

Andrew hums in response, but says nothing, instead waiting for Neil to continue talking. Neil never does, he stays in the same position with his legs over Andrew’s, eating his pasta as if it’ll save him from talking with Andrew. Neil should know better. Andrew doesn’t let go when he wants answers, and Neil should know by now that it’s answers that Andrew is after.

“Auburn hair, blue eyes,” Andrew says, and it gets him Neil’s undivided attention.

“Yes?”

“That’s what one of the witnesses said he looked like,” is Andrew’s only explanation.

For the rest of the night they say nothing else about The Butcher. Neil goes to bed after doing the dishes, stating the cause of his exhaustion to be from work, but Andrew knows better than to trust what comes out of Neil’s mouth by now.

-

The following day when Andrew heads to work, Neil says he starts later than Andrew and will take the bus today. When Andrew asks if he’ll have to pick him up, Neil only says he’ll let him know. Whatever had shaken Neil up the other night is still at play, but Andrew doesn’t press. Either Andrew will figure it out on his own, or Neil will tell him of his own accord. He has other things to worry about for now.

When Andrew walks into the department building, he finds the coroner’s report laying on his desk. Kevin is sitting at his own desk, and when Andrew sits down Kevin looks up.

“You read the report yet?” Andrew asks.

Kevin replies with a nod before returning to his work. Kevin seems busy, completely engrossed in the work in front of him. Andrew vaguely remembers that Kevin had been working on a robbery at a jewelry store with Renee, another one of his coworkers, and that they made an arrest last night after they came back from The Butcher’s crime scene.

Andrew takes the file and flips it open. He recognises Aaron’s neat cursive immediately when he sees who signed off on it. Below it is Wymack’s messier handwriting to show he approved of it. He reads through Tyla’s report first because her death had looked more interesting. It looked like she had tried to fight the culprit off, and as a result he had hit her over the head with something. 

_Coroner's report: Tyla Haze,_

_Cause of death: victim died of exsanguination due to blunt- and sharp force trauma and pre-mortem limb amputation._

_List of injuries: The victim obtained six stab wounds, nine inches in length, four inches deep. nine lacerations, five inches in length, two inches in depth. Multiple bruises located around the shoulders, arms, and ribs. Pre-mortem limb amputation performed with surgical precision, post-mortem decapitation due to hacking with a meat cleaver. Victim also obtained blunt force trauma to the temporal bone and rope burns on the wrists and ankles._

He puts Tyla’s file down and picks up Stephany’s and like he had expected, hers is very similar to Tyla’s. The only real difference is the fact that Stephany had no rope burns. Andrew takes the pictures of the two women and puts them next to each other, studying for similarities.

“Can you get one of the coroners reports of the other victims? One of the earlier cases, if you can?”

Kevin nods and leaves, giving Andrew time to look them over again. The amputations performed on Tyla and Stephany definitely looked cleaner compared to the other cases he remembers. Aside from that, another difference between these two murders and the previous ones was that the other amputations had all been post-mortem and definitely not with surgical precision. These amputations were also not performed with any anaesthetics, meaning the girls felt everything. Andrew wondered how it was possible that absolutely no one had heard the girls scream when passing by the building, or how The Butcher had been able to leave without anyone seeing a man no doubt covered in blood. When Kevin returns and gives him the reports, he puts them next to each other.

“All death by blood loss… All of them amputations. Where do you think The Butcher learned to do surgical amputations?” Andrew asks.

“Maybe he kidnapped a bunch of girls? It’d give him time to practice. We could take a look into the missing person files to see if we can find some that we could tie to him?”

“What an annoying asshole,” Andrew groans.

“I know. Lab results of the samples under the victims nails will be done quickly. We can see if we have a DNA profile, it’ll be a step closer to catching him.”

Andrew looks back at the files. They have no suspects, so even if they had a DNA profile, they have no one to test it against. Their best bet for now will be the police sketch and they will just have to hope someone recognises The Butcher. The sketch won’t be done for another hour or so, which means all Andrew can do is look through the recent abductions.

“Kevin, you want to help me look for kidnappings that could fit The Butcher’s pattern, or are you busy?”

Kevin nods, and together they spend the majority of the day looking through files of kidnappings. A quick look through them tells him that most of them don’t fit The Butcher’s pattern. They either don’t have the correct age or they don’t look the part. In the end they only end up with three missing women who they think might be victims of The Butcher.

Azu Brown, age 24, went missing two weeks ago while on her way to go to a friend to study for a final. They were supposed to meet up at the library but Azu never showed up. Her friend went to look for her at her house, and found the door had been forcefully opened but there was no sign of Azu.

Karen Benbell, age 38, she would be his oldest victim so far, if she really is one of his. She went missing while at a neighborhood potluck four days ago. Her husband reported her missing almost immediately, knowing she wouldn’t just leave him and their three year old son alone.

Megan “Meg” Bhatia, age 29, went missing four months ago after a party at a friends house. She was last seen leaving the party at 4 AM. When she didn’t show up to work the following day and they couldn’t get a hold of her, the police were called.

Karen has the biggest chance of still being alive. Megan and Azu are most likely already dead, but Andrew has a feeling that The Butcher has more girls hidden away in his house than just these three. No one could learn how to perform a surgical amputation in four months without the proper schooling. The Butcher would have to learn through trial and error while keeping his victims alive the entire time.

“If The Butcher practiced at home, how big do you think the chance is that he lives somewhere remote and far off?” Andrew asked.

“Probably. A farm house or somewhere near the forest maybe? He probably doesn’t have many people around him who would be able to tell what he was up to either. My guess is no kids and no marriagel,” Kevin said.

“Mh, that’s probably true.”

Andrew writes what they found down and takes it to Wymack so it can be reviewed.

“Hey, I was thinking,” Kevin begins. He looks down at his desk for a few seconds, and Andrew can only tolerate him dancing around the subject for so long.

“What?” Andrew asks

“You wanna watch a movie tonight? Get some ice cream or whatever, like old times?”

“Yeah, sure. If you don’t mind that Neil’s there.”

“No, that’s fine! He can join if he wants,” Kevin says.

Andrew takes his phone to send Neil a quick text to ask if he wants to join him and Kevin, which Neil reads but doesn’t respond to. Andrew figures he is probably just busy with work, so he puts his phone away and spends the rest of the day working through files of other cases he works with Kevin. At the end of the day, the only text he’s received from Neil is one telling him not to pick him up from work.

“You ready to go?” Andrew asks Kevin.

Kevin nods, grabbing his bag and leaving with Andrew. Across the building is a parking garage where Andrew usually puts his car. Andrew and Kevin enter and take the stairs up, but as they reach the fifth level, Andrew feels like they’re being watched. When he looks at Kevin out of the corner of his eye, he can tell he feels the same. He is rubbing his left hand, most likely feeling phantom pains in the spots where he broke his hand back when he was a teen. Andrew had asked Kevin how he broke it once, when they were still in the police academy and they had gone out drinking. Kevin’s whole demeanor had changed when he asked, all he had said in response was it had been a skiing accident, but Andrew knew that was a lie. He hadn’t asked again, but Kevin had told him a year later how he used to live with some family friends before he found out Wymack was his biological father. The year he moved was the same year he had broken his hand, and that was enough for Andrew to know it hadn’t been an accident.

“Your hand okay?” Andrew asks as he looks for his car keys

“Yeah, it’s just- something feels off.”

“There is no one here, except for us.”

Kevin nods quietly, but doesn’t seem completely reassured. He walks over to Andrew’s car, when suddenly a flash of auburn jumps out from behind a car. Andrew sees something metal passing by his face, and then Kevin clutches his lower right side of his abdomen as he falls to his knees, blood seeping through his fingers as he clutches the stab wound.

Andrew stands frozen for a second, then out of the corner of his eye he sees The Butcher. His face is familiar, though Andrew knows he has never seen him before. He turns and the man nods at him, putting two fingers against his head and giving a salute before running off.

“CPD, FREEZE!” Andrew yells, going to run after him, but Kevin’s pained whines stop him. He looks back at Kevin, sees the amount of blood already covering his clothes, and stays behind to call an ambulance instead. The Butcher laughs when he watches Andrew run back to Kevin, but Andrew tunes him out and grabs Kevin by the shoulders.

“Is it bad?” He asks.

Kevin doesn’t answer, just leans against Andrew and breathes heavily in his neck. Andrew doesn’t waste another minute and calls the ambulance. They arrive quickly at the scene and Kevin is taken to the hospital, while Andrew stays behind to call Wymack up and tell him what happened. When Andrew asks Wymack if he wants him to come back to the precinct, he tells him off and tells him to go look after Kevin first.

Andrew knows he should drive to the hospital, should go and see if Kevin is alright, but his legs won’t move and instead he finds himself dialing Neil’s phone. It rings until it goes to voicemail, and Andrew is about to give up and just drive off, when Neil calls him back.

“Neil,” he says. His voice is slightly shaky and Andrew feels nauseated.

“What happened?”

“The Butcher stabbed Kevin. He’s going to the hospital.”

“I’ll be there. It’ll be okay, Andrew,” Neil says, his voice soft and steady and Andrew believes him.

Neil hangs up shortly after that and Andrew gets into his car and drives off to the hospital. He waits outside in the parking lot, smoking a cigarette while looking for Neil. They didn’t agree to meet anywhere, but somehow Andrew knows he’ll come to the parking lot. He just sits and waits for Neil, smoking one cigarette after the other until his pack is empty. It’s slowly gone dark, when he sees a figure approaching him from the roadside. As they approach, Andrew sees a flash of auburn and he pales. He reaches for his gun, as the figure approaches and he is certain it’s The Butcher, it just has to be.

“CPD, put your hands in the air!” he yells.

“Andrew-“

“HANDS IN THE AIR!”

The man puts his hands in the air and Andrew slowly approaches, and then he realises it’s Neil. He looks at him and slowly lowers his gun. Neil sighs and puts his hands down, before placing a hand on Andrew’s shoulder. He can feel Neil’s tenseness, and a pang of guilt makes itself at home in Andrew’s body.

“I thought you were The Butcher,” Andrew says.

Neil pulls his hand away from Andrew like he’s been burned. He looks like he is about to run away and Andrew suddenly realises why the face looked so familiar. They have the same face shape, the same eyes and the same hair. The biggest difference is The Butcher is older and Neil is not.

“You do look kind of similar. You need to tell me something?”

“Are you fucking accusing me?” Neil hisses, seemingly having found his tongue back.

“Maybe I am, what will you do about it?”

Neil looks at him, not saying anything for a long time. Andrew has never felt so lost before, has never felt like he didn’t know what Neil would say. Usually he can give at least an accurate guess, but now as he looks back at Neil he feels like he doesn’t even know him at all. Andrew wonders if he crossed a line, wonders if he should back down. He doesn’t, instead he just stares head first back at Neil who looks like he wants to punch Andrew.

He doesn’t punch him though. Instead, he turns, and leaves Andrew standing alone in the dark.

Neil has never left Andrew before, and suddenly Andrew feels like his world has been turned upside down. He steadies himself by holding onto his car, but the image of Neil just walking away leaves him weak in the legs. He has to focus, has to go inside and has to go see Kevin, but his legs won’t move and Andrew is confused. He forces himself to steady, and when he’s sure he can keep going he stands and goes inside. Walking away feels wrong, but he pushes his feelings down and keeps walking.

Kevin’s room is high up and his bed is by the window, but Andrew swallows his nerves and strides to his side. Kevin is asleep, so he sits in a chair next to his bed where he falls asleep as well. During the night Wymack comes to see his son. When he finds Andrew sleeping next to him he finds a blanket and places it over him. He leaves later that night, content to know Kevin is in safe hands with Andrew.

-

When Andrew finally goes home, Neil is nowhere to be found. King is laying by his bedroom door, and when Andrew passes him he loudly meows, begging for food. Andrew has a feeling Neil didn’t sleep at home the night before. When he opens Neil’s bedroom door and finds his bed the way Neil left it the other day before going to work, that suspicion is confirmed. He goes into the kitchen and feeds the cats, then makes breakfast for himself and looks around the house for a note. Andrew finds nothing that confirms Neil has even made it home, and a flare of panic spikes up in his body. He digs his phone out of his pocket and calls Allison, one of Neil’s coworkers at the DA’s office that Neil was somewhat friendly with. She doesn’t answer, but calls back a few minutes later.

“Minyard,” she says in lieu of a greeting.

“Reynolds. Is Neil at work? He didn’t show up at home tonight.”

“No, he called in sick… Everything okay over there?” She asks. Her voice is filled with fake concern, but Andrew knows she is just looking for more office gossip, so he hangs up on her. He goes to Neil’s contact and briefly considers calling him, then thinks better of it and texts him instead.

**Andrew** : You didn’t come home last night. Are you alright?

**Neil** : Yeah.

 **Andrew** : Won’t you come home?

<i> _Seen_ <i>

Andrew waits for Neil to respond, but he goes offline after a few minutes. Andrew stares at his phone for a little longer until the screen turns off on it’s own and then he falls back on the couch. He rests his elbows on his legs and buries his face in his hands, sitting like that until his phone pings, alerting him of a message. He quickly checks, hoping it to be from Neil, but it’s from his internet provider telling him they’re sending a bill. He curses at himself for allowing himself something as silly as to hope Neil would just forgive him like that. He tosses his phone on the couch and sighs deeply, steadying himself. It’s just a stupid fight. This isn’t one of his foster parents who’ll throw him out the moment he becomes a hand full, this is Neil who he has lived with for some time. This is Neil they’re talking about, someone who Andrew has trusted more than he has ever trusted anyone in his life, who he allowed himself to open up to and be vulnerable with. This was just a fight with Neil, and it was something they would come out off eventually. Andrew doesn’t even know why he said that he thought Neil looked like The Butcher. Maybe it had been because of shock, but clearly Neil had not enjoyed it. He lets out a sigh and grabs his phone again, this time to text Renee.

Andrew: You free?

Renee: I am.

Andrew: Be there in an hour.

_ <i>seen<i> _

-

Renee’s cafe is not that far from Andrew’s home, but eating breakfast and taking a shower means he shows up late anyway. The cafe is bustling with life, regular customers chatting with Renee at the counter while she cleans and makes coffee. Andrew can smell cakes being made in the kitchen, and he feels a little like home. He sits down at a small table, waiting for Renee to be done with her other customers. When the cafe slowly clears out, she walks up to Andrew with a piece of rainbow cake and a coffee with so much sugar in it Kevin would probably cry if he saw it. He takes it from Renee without a word and she sits opposite of him.

“It’s good to see you again,” she says. Her voice is so calm and collected Andrew instantly feels a weight drop from his shoulders. Renee understands his dark past, has helped him understand that he can move on and be better. When he told her he was going to join the police academy, she had cried a little from joy. She had said Andrew was healing. She told him that focusing on his future was a sign of progression. He didn’t believe her back then, but as he sips on his coffee he realises she was right. Andrew has come a long way in healing, has fallen back countless times but has always gotten up. Andrew was healing, despite what countless people had told him over the years.

“It’s been a while. Work has kept me busy,” Andrew says. He sometimes wants to thank Renee for being such a great friend, but he never gets the words out of his mouth. He’s pretty sure she still gets it, though.

“We’ll find time again. Why did you want to come? You seemed distressed over text.”

Andrew doesn’t immediately respond, sipping on his coffee instead. It’s really fucking sweet.

“Neil and I had a fight. He didn’t come home last night. Also, Kevin was attacked.”

Renee quietly nods, then excuses herself and gets up to help a customer. Andrew busies himself with the rainbow cake while she’s gone. It’s a new recipe, Andrew is always the first to try Renee’s new recipes and he loves that. They’re always good, but he never tells her of the bat. This time won’t be any different. When Renee comes back, Andrew holds the fork out to her. There is nothing on it, but Renee watches him intently.

“Not enough sugar,” is all Andrew says this time.

Renee smiles fondly, nodding at him. “I’ll remember that.”

Andrew hums and continues eating the cake. Renee patiently waits before she brings up Neil again.

“What was the fight about?”

“Mh, I said he looked like the guy who stabbed Kevin.”

“Does he?”

“Sorta? Similar face, similar hair and eyes. Probably a shit coincidence though. Either way, he was pissed. Called in sick at work too.”

“That’s odd,” Renee says, but there is no implication in her voice so Andrew decides to drop it there.

“How are things with you and Reynolds?”

Renee smiles at that, and they spend the rest of the day talking about her relationship with Allison Reynolds. Andrew is glad to hear Renee has found her soulmate and that they are working things out together. If anyone deserves to be happy with their soulmate, it’s Renee, even though he doesn’t really like Reynolds. Renee insists she isn’t that bad and wants him to meet her, but Andrew hasn’t found a time to do so yet.

-

When Andrew arrives back home, he finds Neil standing in the living room. He is surrounded by a bunch of boxes, and King is in a cat carrier. Andrew recognises the boxes as moving boxes, but his brain has some trouble catching up to what’s happening.

“What are you-“

“I’m moving in with Matt. He’s coming over to pick up the last of my things in an hour,” Neil interrupts.

Andrew feels like the ground below his feet splits open, he has to walk over to a chair and sit down because he worries he might fall to his knees. He says nothing and Neil sits down as far away from him as he can. They stay like that for an hour, and the silence is only disturbed when Matt enters to help Neil walk the last of his boxes down to the car. Andrew watches them and says nothing. Finally, Neil walks upstairs alone and holds the key to the apartment out to Andrew, expecting him to take it.

“Here, I won’t be needing this anymore,” he says.

Andrew doesn’t even acknowledge him, just stares ahead at Sir sleeping in the windowsill. Neil waits, but he has always been impatient. After an uncomfortably long time of silence, he throws the keys into Andrew’s lap.

“Fine, be like that. Goodbye Andrew.”

With that, Neil leaves and slams the door shut, waking up a startled Sir and leaving Andrew all alone in an empty apartment that all of a sudden feels too big for him. Sir lets out an indignant meow, stretches, and makes his way to Andrew, getting up in his lap and falling asleep there. Andrew sits there for what feels like hours, then finally he gently takes Sir off his lap and walks to the bedroom. He has to be at work the following day, so he gets to bed and wills himself to fall asleep and not think about Neil. It only half works, but half is still better than nothing and Andrew will just have to do with what he’s got.

-

<i> _Wednesday, 5 AM_ <i>

The following day Andrew wakes to the sound of Sir meowing in the living room. In his half conscious state of mind, Andrew thinks Neil will take care of it. His heart drops when he realises Neil is gone. He pulls a pillow over his head, and falls back asleep.

-

<i> _Wednsday, 10:25 AM_ <i>

Andrew shows up late to work. Wymack immediately sends him home when he walks in, saying he shouldn’t show up after what happened to Kevin. Andrew goes home and smokes a whole pack of cigarettes.

-

<i> _Wednesday, 1 PM. No whiskey_ <i>

Andrew shuts his phone off when Nicky texts him, asking him how he’s doing. Sometimes he forgets he gave Neil Nicky’s fucking phone number. He just wants to be alone.

-

<i> _Wednesday, 4 pm. two shots of whiskeys_ <i>

Andrew is mad. He’s pretty sure he hates Neil at this point.

-

<i> _Wednesday, 8 PM. eight shots of whiskey_ <i>

He’s not so sure he hates Neil.

-

<i> _Wednesday, ??? PM/AM. Too many fucking drinks_ <i>

He might be in love with Neil.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope y'all liked this chapter! If u did feel free to leave a comment or come say hi on my tumblr @eloquent-apollo


	5. 2020 part two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am full of surprises here is chapter five! Tuesday I will upload chapter 6, the tiny epilogue and then the story is... over? What!

He might be in love with Neil fucking Josten. It’s the first thing that hits him when he wakes up the following morning. The migraine comes second. Andrew hasn’t had this much alcohol since college, and clearly his body didn’t agree with a sudden trip down to memory lane. At least Wymack still doesn’t want him showing up to work. He might have called him while drunk at midnight, but he doesn’t really recall and he also doesn’t really care. Andrew doesn’t want to think about Neil, doesn’t want to think about the possibility of being in love. Even worse, the thought of finding out they aren’t soulmates is causing his heart to tighten in his chest. He has never felt like this before and he doesn’t even recall when he began to feel this way for Neil. He never knew he was falling until he landed face first on the floor, and now Andrew is in pain. What’s even worse is that he’s longing for that feeling of soaring despite knowing what comes after the fall. He knows he should stand, should get up and keep walking, but he can’t. With the sudden way Neil left, the fall turned more into a crash, and a heavy weight is keeping him pinned on Neil.

He’s longing for a hot shower, a way to just forget, so he slowly rolls out of bed. His head spins and when he stands he has to rush to the bin to throw up. Stomach acid burns in the back of his throat and he dry heaves a few times before he trusts himself to stand again. The nausea stays, but Andrew manages to make it to the shower. He turns the shower on as hot as he can stand, feeling like his worries are being washed away. He traces over his soulmate mark with his hand. The handprint on his neck is still black, a mark of someone who has yet to touch their soulmate, and for the first time in his life Andrew feels something like worry. The idea of rejection doesn’t scare Andrew, but the idea of being rejected by Neil does. He hates that he has gotten so dependent. He hates Neil. He just wants to go back to bed, but Sir’s constant demanding meows are threatening to worsen his fading migraine, so he heads to the kitchen to feed him instead.

“Stop fucking yelling, Jesus Christ. I heard you the first time,” Andrew says, while pouring some cat food in a bowl.

Sir’s loud meows stop the moment Andrew puts the bowl down in front of him and he all but shoves his face inside to eat. Andrew heads back to his room to get dressed. Wymack said he could go back to work tomorrow if he wants, so Andrew just has to survive one more day at home. He gets into some comfort clothes and it isn’t until he passes by a mirror he realises that the orange sweater he’s wearing is Neil’s.

Just like that, Andrew’s slightly improved mood has been ruined. He takes it off and angrily throws it into the corner of the room where he doesn’t have to look at it. He takes his black sweater from a chair instead, walks into the living room and turns the TV on. He skips through channels until he finds some stupid show to watch and lets Sir lay down on his lap.

Andrew didn’t realise he had even fallen asleep, but the ringing of the doorbell wakes him up. Neil’s come back. Andrew knew he couldn’t be serious about leaving. He takes Sir off his lap, walks over to the door, opens it, and finds Kevin standing by the door. Just like that all his hope is crushed, so he walks back inside and Kevin follows after him.

“How are you?” Kevin asked, and really, he has no right to even fucking ask. Andrew’s not the one who got stabbed by a fucking serial killer.

“How are _you_?” He snaps back.

“Fine. It still hurts, but the pain will pass and all I’ve got left of it will be a scar. I think he was aiming to harm,” Kevin says, sitting down next to Andrew. “Were you worried or something?” he teases.

Andrew doesn’t turn to look at Kevin, but he can hear the smirk in his voice. Knowing that Kevin is alright takes some of the worries off Andrew’s shoulders, and he feels a little less like he failed him. Seeing him only in the hospital and covered in blood during the attack had made Andrew think Kevin had been worse off than this, but if he was released after two days with only stitches and some painkillers he was probably alright.

“At least now we know what he looks like,” Kevin jokes, when Andrew says nothing.

“A police sketch just wasn’t enough for you, was it?” Andrew asks, making Kevin smile slightly.

Spending the rest of the day with Kevin definitely beats being alone and miserable. He doesn’t know if Wymack told Kevin to come see Andrew and make sure he wasn’t drowning in whiskey again, but he’s just glad he came. Having friends isn’t really all that bad, and Andrew is just glad he has Kevin and Renee.

-

Kevin ends up staying the night in Neil’s old bedroom. He isn’t ready to return to work yet so Andrew lets him sleep and leaves a little note that says he can stay there all day if he wants. He left Neil’s old keys next to the note in case he wants to leave before Andrew came home and lock things up. When he is about to leave, he peaks into the guest room to make sure Kevin is still asleep, and is satisfied to see him completely tangled up in the sheets and snoring loudly. How he didn’t hear his snoring in his own room is a fucking miracle. He quietly closes the bedroom door and goes to grab his car keys. He’s been assigned to work with Dan Wilds from now on to continue working the case. Andrew has never really had any problems with her. Everyone knows that she is set to take over as captain of the precinct after Wymack retires, and Andrew personally couldn’t really think of any other person in the whole damn building who would be more suited to take over. He used to have his doubts about her, but he had seen her take whatever got thrown at her with no complaints. Over the years of working with her he grew to like her form of leadership.

Not that he would ever tell her that to her face. He doesn’t need it getting to her head. She’s also engaged to Matt Boyd, a cps lawyer and Neil’s new roommate. Andrew would count that as a bad point, but Dan makes up for it by being one of the detectives who agreed to back up Wymack when it came to hiring Aaron as their M.E. A doctor who’d lost his medical license because of drug abuse was a bad idea no matter how you looked at it, but Wymack had fought tooth and nail with Dan and Andrew by his side to get him on board. Aaron wasn’t sure how to thank them for what they did, so he spends most of his time hidden in the morgue and interacting as little with the others as he can. Andrew has been trying to push him to talk to the others more, but to no avail. Today Aaron will be at work as well, and he had texted Andrew the night before asking if they could have lunch together. Since he usually has it with Kevin who’s currently not working, he had agreed.

Showing up to work, he finds Dan already waiting by his desk. She hands him a file of a murder he’s missed out on while being forced out of work. A quick look through tells him the victim is a 25 year old woman by the name of Brooklyn Campbell. She had a pre-mortem amputation like the others, but her actual cause of death was asphyxiation.

“What changed?” Andrew asks.

“We were on our way. Someone called about hearing someone breaking into Brooklyn’s apartment and heard people fighting. He had to finish up fast.”

Andrew puts the file down on his desk. “Did you read up on what Kevin and I found before?”

Dan gestures at her own desk that’s got piles of files stacked on them. “I’ve kept myself busy.”

“Andrew and Dan, good to see you two are here,” Wymack approaches them. He shoots Andrew a look, silently asking if he’s okay, but Andrew says nothing to confirm or deny it. “I got a new case for you. Aaron is already on his way. The Butcher’s not resting today.”

-

The crime scene is an old abandoned warehouse that’s been known to inhabit squatters. Aaron is waiting outside for Andrew and Dan, and gives them a courtesy nod in lieu of a greeting, then leads them inside the building. The walls are covered in spray paint, showing everything from impressive art to crude insults and people’s signatures. It’s a sign of living, and yet it so strangely fits the scene of a murder. Andrew follows Aaron up the stairs till they reach the top, where a white tarp has been carefully spread out by The Butcher. The victim, a girl seeming no older than nineteen, is laying on top of it. Her limbs have been amputated. Her eyes are closed, but she looks almost peaceful. It’s strange, usually The Butcher’s victims are decapitated and can’t be described as peaceful.

“Do we have an ID?” Andrew asks.

“No, she got nothing,” an officer replies.

Aaron shrugs and walks closer to the victim, reaching out to examine her wounds, and then she opens her eyes. For a few seconds nothing happens, Aaron looks surprised as his hand is reaching for the girl’s shoulder, and she looks at Aaron as if he is going to kill her. Then, she screams. Aaron screams back in shock and stumbles back, slipping and falling into a puddle of her blood. He’s shocked for only a few seconds, then the doctor’s instinct comes back to him and Aaron is next to her in a second. Andrew can tell from the look on Aaron’s face it’s useless, but he instructs the officer to call an ambulance nonetheless.

“It’s okay. You’ll be fine,” Aaron says, voice fake soothing. Even the girl doesn’t seem convinced. “Who did this to you?” He asks softly, as he looks for something to stop the bleeding with.

“I-I-“ she chokes out. Aaron strokes her hair softly, before snapping at someone to give them a piece of his shirt so he can tie her wounds.

“It’s fine. It’s fine, just tell us who did this. We’ll make sure he goes to jail for a long, long time,” he says as he receives a piece of clothing. He tears it to shreds, and starts to wrap it around the wounds to stop them from bleeding. The girl flinches and lets out a sob, but Aaron continues.

“He- He was a friend… He used to bring me food,” she sobbed.

“What’s his name,” Dan whispered, getting closer to hold the girl's shoulder gently.

“Na- Nathan… Wesninski… Will you- Will you tell my mum I am sorry for not- not coming home?”

Dan nods quietly, stroking her shoulder. “What’s your mum’s name?” She asks softly.

“Susan McKinley.”

Andrew quickly writes it down, and Dan nods quietly.

“This is all I can do until the ambulance arrives…” Aaron says, but the tone in his voice says it won’t matter. Even if they arrived now, she had lost so much blood she wouldn’t survive.

“Thank you… What’s your name, sir?” The girl whispers, closing her eyes quietly.

“Aaron Minyard. Hey now, keep your eyes open.. You have to stay awake,” He says softly.

“Thank you, Aaron… Bu-but I am so tired… It’s fine…”

Aaron gently shakes her, but she doesn’t say anything else after that. For a few minutes, all Andrew can hear is the sound of his own breathing, while he stares at Aaron who’s still holding the girl’s head in his lap. Then Aaron looks up at the other officers watching, and with a shaky voice he says, “I’m calling it… Time of death, 10:37 AM…”

In the distance the sound of an ambulance with their sirens on can be heard coming towards them. Aaron slowly moves the girl off his lap, before standing up and walking off. Andrew knows Aaron cried when his first patient died and he knows he will be crying now again. When an officer tries to go after him, Andrew simply shakes his head. Instead, he gets up himself and goes after Aaron, leaving Dan to do the investigation by herself.

He finds Aaron a few staircases down, talking to the paramedics to explain what has happened. He’s not crying yet, but Andrew can tell it will be any minute now from the way his voice trembles. The paramedics look up at Andrew when he walks down, and he gestures for them to head upstairs if they want to see it for themselves. They immediately head upstairs, and when their footsteps die down Aaron let’s out an anguished sob and lets himself slide down to the floor. He pulls his knees up to his chest, and just sobs. Years of living with Aaron meant they had improved the way they acted around each other, but Andrew has still rarely seen Aaron cry. The only distinctive moment he can remember is when Andrew forced him through rehab when they were teens, shortly after they moved in with Nicky together. Back then he had ignored him, had ignored his cries when Aaron begged him to let him out, but this time he reaches out and places a hand on his shoulder. Aaron looks up at him, wiping tears away with his sleeves. They say nothing, but Aaron seems thankful nonetheless.

“I never asked her for her name,” Aaron finally says after a few minutes.

“She didn’t mind. You did your best, but you both knew it was a lost cause.”

Aaron sighs and says nothing. He has stopped crying all together, but he stares blankly ahead at the wall now. Nicky once asked Aaron if he grieved over the patients he couldn’t save when he was still a doctor. Aaron had said he grieved them all, he just moved on as fast as he could because he had others to save.

“I think she was thankful you tried,” Andrew says, before getting back up.

“Yeah…” Aaron looks up at him, then holds out a hand and let’s Andrew drag him back up. They return to the crime scene together, and Aaron examines the body of a girl he desperately tried to save mere minutes ago. Andrew used to think Aaron was a spineless pushover, but as he watches Aaron doing his job he realises he couldn’t have been more wrong.

-

The crime scene has given them a surprising amount of new evidence, but the most helpful piece of evidence is by far the victim choking out The Butcher’s real name.

Nathan Wesnisnki, a 52 year old man with no wife or children. Very fittingly, he is a butcher working at a meat shop in downtown Columbia. His current whereabouts are unknown, as he hasn’t shown up for work in quite some time. When they went to his house to make an arrest, no one was there. The only thing they found were a bunch of bodies in a small room in the house’s basement that they were able to match to several ongoing missing persons cases. Nathan had no friends in the community, and none of his neighbours seem to know where Nathan could have possibly gone. It’s giving Andrew a fucking headache, trying to think it over with Dan.

“Didn’t he have a cabin in the woods?” Dan suddenly asks.

Andrew looks through his files that are laying around the small room they locked themselves in. Their shifts have long ended, but both refuse to head home until they figure it out. Chinese take out food is getting cold in its bag on the corner of the table and Andrew nearly knocks it over looking for the file listing all of the properties that Nathan owns.

“Yeah, like one hour away from here. You think he’s hiding out there?”

“Definitely. Call for an arrest team?”

Andrew nods, and not even ten minutes later they’re riding out with a team to the forest where Nathan is presumably residing.

They make it there in a little less than an hour. Andrew and Dan get out first, guns in hand as they approach the building. Lights are on inside and they can see the shadow of a man through the thin curtains. Andrew signals for the others to surround the building, and both he and Dan take position at the front door. Andrew signals to go on the count of three, and Dan counts down quietly. Andrew kicks the door in, and heads in with Dan right beside him.

“CPD! Nathan Wesninski, drop the knife and put your hands in the air!” Andrew shouts when they find him in the middle of the living room. Nathan is holding a butcher knife, but drops it when he realises he’s surrounded.

“Put your hands on your head, kneel on the floor,” Andrew says. Nathan complies, putting his hands on his head. Andrew takes out handcuffs and cuffs Nathan.

“Nathan Wesninski, you are under arrest for the murders of fifteen different women. You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you. You have the right to an attorney. If you can not afford one, one will be appointed to you by the state.”

Nathan says nothing as Andrew walks him back to one of the cop cars and puts him inside. Just like that, Andrew watches the cop car drive off and things are just over. He spent so long on the case and now it’s just over. He turns to Dan, who smiles and gestures for him to get back into his car.

“It’s time for drinks.”

“And the chinese food we left at the station,” Andrew says, which makes Dan laugh.

-

The following day and a hangover later, Andrew is tasked with going to the DA’s office to inform Neil of Nathan’s arrest. If Kevin was here, he would have offered to do it for him. If Kevin was here, Andrew would have probably let him, but Kevin isn’t here and no one else is going to do this for him, so he heads to the DA’s office by himself. It’s a short walk from the precinct, so Andrew lights a cigarette on the walk. It’s still warm out, comfortable enough that Andrew doesn’t feel like the sweating alone is killing him. He likes these days. The days where summer is slowly creeping away, but he can still enjoy himself and bask in the heat. He used to hang out with Neil on his balcony and just smoke and read on days like these.

When he reaches the building he tosses his cigarette away and heads inside. Neil’s office is a few floors up, and as he heads upstairs he comes across countless people he’s worked with before. He doesn’t greet all of them, only the ones he can bear. He takes the elevator for the last part, then walks down long hallways until he finds Neil’s empty office. He knows he’s at work today, so he goes over to the next and asks Neil’s coworker if he has seen Neil.

“He’s on break, he’s in the breakroom,” he says, pointing in the direction of the break room.

Andrew thanks him and heads towards the break room. From a distance he can hear someone laughing, and as he opens the door he realises it’s a caseworker. He looks familiar, and when the man turns his way he realises it’s Seth Gordon. He and Neil were an unlikely pair of friends. They clashed in almost everything which resulted in a few fights now and again. Seth had been to Andrew’s apartment once to have a beer with Neil, but Andrew got so fed up with him he told him to fuck right off. Neil had been upset that he kicked him out, but Andrew remained firm in Seth’s ban from the apartment. Neil still hung out with Seth, which Andrew didn’t mind, but it was clear he and Seth were never going to get along.

“What are you doing here, detective Minyard?” Seth asks with an animosity to his voice that immediately makes it clear to Andrew that Neil told him about the fight they had.

“We need Josten at the precinct. We have The Butcher in custody.”

Neil looks at Seth, a tense set to his shoulder. He looks like he wants to run. Seth puts a hand on Neil’s arm, but it does nothing to take care of the strained look on his face.

“Okay,” Neil says, and he slowly gets up as if he doesn’t trust himself not to run away if he gets up any faster.

Andrew doesn’t stay to watch. He turns the moment Neil is out of his chair and walks away. Hurried footsteps behind him tell him Neil is following, but Andrew says nothing. They get into the elevator together and as the doors close an uncomfortable silence lays down beneath them. Andrew almost feels an ache in his chest, a longing for the days where he could understand Neil and silence was comfort between them. He misses reaching for Neil and getting something back in response. He misses the cigarettes on the balcony, the beers, the bad movies. He misses Neil. Fuck, he even misses King.

Being in love means Andrew has become vulnerable, but vulnerability with Neil was never a weakness. It was knowing each other, picking each other up from dark places and holding them steady until they could walk on their own. Love with Neil meant just that. Love.

Andrew misses living with Neil. He wants to tell him he misses him, but as he turns to speak, the doors open and another lawyer comes in.

Andrew keeps quiet.

They make it downstairs after a long uncomfortably silent elevator ride, then together they head to the police department. Andrew briefly considers lighting another cigarette, but he used to always share with Neil and he feels like if he won’t offer him one now it’ll just mean things are really over between them. At the same time, offering a cigarette like nothing ever happened feels worse.

“So, who did the arrest?” Neil asks.

“Dan and I did,” Andrew says.

Neil nods but says nothing else. Andrew can tell from the tense set in his shoulders that he’s getting more anxious the closer they get to the building, but Andrew is in no position to ask him what’s wrong. All he can do is take him inside, straight to the holding cell so he can see Nathan Wesninski. He’s to be picked up today and get transferred to a jail where he will stay. If Neil does his job right he’ll be in there without a bail so he can’t leave till the official court hearing.

“You ready to see him?” Andrew asks, as he stops in front of the door leading to the holding cell.

Neil pales, clearly not anticipating getting to actually see him before the trail, but finally he swallows and nods. Andrew opens the door, and walks inside to face Nathan Wesninski.

The holding cells are cold, the heating had been left off overnight. Andrew shivers, so he walks to the wall and turns it back on.

“Did they let you freeze?” Andrew asks.

“Oh no, the blanket kept me warm, detective,” Nathan replies. His voice is smooth and almost soothing. He’s a kind prisoner, despite being a horrible man. He makes small talk with the officers on duty that guard him, talking about sports games and the news as if he was at work talking to his customers. Sometimes he even makes jokes. “I asked them to turn it off, actually,” Nathan adds.

“I see.”

“Who is your little friend waiting outside?” Nathan asks.

Andrew turns to the door and sees Neil hasn’t entered yet, he gestures for him to step inside, but Neil hesitates. Andrew has never seen Neil so nervous about meeting a prisoner before, something doesn’t add up. Andrew remembers the violent reaction to being told he looked like The Butcher, remembers the resemblances, and as Neil enters the holding cells, it finally snaps into place.

“Hello, junior.”

Nathan smiles a wicked smile and Neil goes tense all over, then he’s running. Andrew runs after him, the officers at the door shouting after him but Andrew ignores it. Neil is heading for the stairs, but Andrew is faster. When Neil throws open the door, Andrew grabs him by his forearm and yanks him back until he is facing him. Neil looks at him, his eyes frantic and searching. Searching for an exit, a way to escape, but Andrew squeezes his arm and makes Neil focus his gaze back on him.

“Stay,” he says. His voice steady, grounding. He needs Neil to know he wants him to stay. He wants Neil back. “I’m sorry.”

Neil lets out a shuddering breath, his body calms and he reaches for Andrew, placing his hand on his neck, before resting his forehead against Andrew’s.

“I can’t,” Neil whispers.

“You can. I won’t let you leave,” Andrew whispers.

He runs his hand over Neil’s arm, and out of the corner of his eye he registers a splash of red and orange on Neil’s arm that sets his heart racing.

_ S _ _ oulmates _ .

He ignores it, focusses on Neil instead. He can keep him calm, he can keep him safe.

“He’s my father,” Neil whispers, soft enough that only Andrew can hear it.

Andrew had already had suspicions, but having it confirmed still makes his word tilt ever so slightly. He doesn’t care, though. He couldn’t fucking care less about who Neil’s father is, as long as Neil, his soulmate, is here it doesn’t matter.

“We’ll get him in jail. No one needs to know,” Andrew whispers.

Neil moves his hand to run it through Andrew’s hair, and from the way Neil’s eyes widen slightly, Andrew can tell he has seen the mark. Before Neil can do anything, Andrew steps away from him.

“Not here, and definitely not now. We have other things to worry about, alright?”

Neil nods and Andrew gestures for him to follow him upstairs. Neil seems to hesitate, looking back at the holding cell, so Andrew grabs his hand. Immediately, Andrew has Neil’s undivided attention again, he can feel his intent gaze on his back as he walks upstairs. Neil follows him upstairs obediently, never letting go of Andrew’s hand until they reach the floor Andrew works on. Andrew puts his hands in his pockets so no one can see the way he clenches his fist, then heads to his desk to get Neil all the information he needs. They spend the rest of the day going over details, and as Andrew watches Neil, he knows he will be alright.

-

The trial starts a week later. The department is not at all worried, they have a solid case to defend themselves. Nathan had paid for his own lawyer, a man by the name of Ichirou Moriyama. He is the only thing that seems to make Neil worry. Ichirou came from a rich family of lawyers, who Andrew was pretty sure worked with bribery rather than by oath. Ichirou is the reason the trial keeps dragging out, and Andrew is worried that if it continues like this the trial will last them all year. It’s getting to Neil too, who keeps showing up to Andrew’s apartment after trials to drink with him. Andrew makes sure he doesn’t take it too far, then calls Matt to pick him up every night.

This night is no different, Neil is splayed out on the couch with a beer in his hand, watching some dumb cartoon with Andrew who’s enjoying a simple coffee. When the cartoon ends, Neil lazily turns to Andrew, just watching him sip his coffee and browsing his phone on the chair next to the couch.

“Stop staring.”

“You’re pretty,” Neil mutters.

“You’re drunk.”

Andrew rolls his eyes, and Neil has no response to that so he turns back to the TV. After a while, Neil gets off the couch and walks over to Andrew. He stops in front of him, and Andrew puts his phone away to look up at Neil.

“I want to come back home,” Neil whispers.

It takes Andrew a few minutes to realise that Neil is asking to move back in, but when he realises he can’t be bothered to suppress the smile that crosses his face. Neil smiles back when he realises that means he can come back. Andrew shifts in the chair, and Neil climbs into his lap. Neil buries his face in Andrew’s neck, his breaths tickling his soulmate mark as Neil drifts off to sleep in his arms. Andrew knows he is the one that said they shouldn’t act on their feelings until after Nathan’s been sentenced to jail, but Neil has become a lot more affectionate and he really can’t bring himself to tell him off. In moments like these, sometimes he thinks about what it’d be like to kiss him.

-

The trial continues the following day, and Andrew has to make an appearance as a witness together with Aaron and Dan. They enter the court building an hour after Neil does and Andrew can’t help but to wonder how he’s doing. They are allowed to enter the court after waiting for twenty minutes, and they sit at the front behind the spot where Neil will soon be sitting.

“September 25th, Nathan Wesninski against the state of South Carolina is now in hearing,” someone says. “Everyone, please stand for judge Walsh.”

Everyone stands as judge Walsh enters the room. After he sits down, he motions for people to sit down again.

“Good morning everybody. Let’s get this case started. Neil Josten on the side of the state, please present your case.”

“On the morning of September 2 at around 8 in the morning, a man entered an abandoned warehouse. This was the residence of Emma McKinley. The man then tortured and killed Emma, however, when the man left, she was still alive. According to the medical examiner, officers and detectives, the victim said the name of her attacker was Nathan Wesninski. A man she not only knew before her death, but was, according to other squatters, moderately close with. Due to victim and witness statements, extensive evidence and time of death, we the state, accuse Nathan Wesninski of the murder of Emma McKinley. Mr Moriyama, how does the defendant plead?”

Neil is a beast in the court. His voice rises above everything, even if there is no sound. The way he speaks, the way he stands, all eyes are drawn to him and you can tell Neil is aware. Neil carries himself with ease, making eye contact where necessary. He sits down when he is done, and peeks back at Andrew for just a second. He knows he has Ichirou and Nathan cornered, or he wouldn’t have so boldly asked how Nathan pleaded. Ichirou looks at Nathan, then rises from his chair.

“Your honour, my client pleads guilty on all counts of murder,” Ichirou says, before sitting down again.

What comes next is a long discussion where Neil presents evidence to the jury and Ichirou twists and stretches Neil’s words back to him to make it look like Neil is blowing everything out of proportion. When they finish with that, it’s time for witness statements. Andrew is the first to be called to testify. He gets up from the bench he’s sitting on, gives Aaron and Dan reassuring looks because they’ll be next, then heads up to the stand.

“Andrew Minyard, do you swear to speak the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?”

“So help me God,” Andrew says.

Neil waits until he’s given the floor, then heads up to the stands. They rehearsed how the questioning would go, with bogus questions like if he loved Sir more than King, but it still couldn’t fully prepare him for what it was like at the real witness stand. Camera’s in the back of the court are all pointing at Andrew and he wonders if this hearing will be aired. Not all hearings are, but he knows certain footage will make its way to the press.

“Detective Minyard, is it true you were one of the detectives assigned to the defendant case, who followed it from start to end?”

“That’s correct, though we knew it as The Butcher’s case back then.”

“And is it true that before you knew who The Butcher was, he attacked another detective you had been working with on the case?”

“Yes, he attacked my coworker Kevin Day in the parking lot across from the police department.”

“Did you get a good look at the man?”

“I did.”

“Will you be able to point to the man that attacked Kevin Day?”

Andrew nods and points at Nathan, who looks calm and collected back at Andrew.

“Let it be noted that the witness, Andrew Minyard, is pointing at the defendant.”

It was time for his last question, the one that, if Nathan had been stupid enough to plead innocent, should have been the one that would prove his guilt.

“When you were at the crime scene of Emma McKinley, did she tell you the name of her killer?”

“She did.”

“Can you tell me what his name was?”

“Nathan Wesninski.”

“Thank you very much. That will be all, your honour.”

Neil returns to his chair, and it’s time for Ichirou to ask his questions. He stands up and makes his way to Andrew. Ichirou is filled with arrogance and the foolish notion that he is better than the others in the court. Andrew can tell, from the way he moves that he truly believes that he can somehow salvage the mess that Nathan has made. If he wasn’t under oath and this wasn’t a court hearing, he would have said something about it.

“Detective Minyard, is it true you and mister Josten are soulmates?”

Neil all but shoots up from his chair, a frantic look on his face that he quickly wipes away with a neutral one.

“Objection, your honour. Whether or not mister Minyard is my soulmate has nothing to do with this case,” Neil says.

The judge considers it, then ultimately rules in Neil’s favour. Ichirou asks him some other questions he couldn’t care less about, then Andrew is released. Neil calls Aaron on next, and Ichirou naturally asks about his drug issues in the past, but Aaron does incredibly well. Dan is next, but they ask her similar questions to the ones they asked Andrew. Ichirou doesn’t have many questions for her, so she is released shortly after. Ichirou calls someone on as a witness to vouch for Nathan’s good character before the murders, but from the bored look Neil has on his face he doubts it’s going to be doing him much good. They move through the rest pretty easily enough. Neil has an aura of confidence hanging around him that could almost be described as arrogant, except he really is that good of a lawyer and no one can blame him for knowing it.

“Sir Josten, we have come to the end of the hearing. What punishment does the state want to process against Mister Wesninski?” Judge Walsh asks

Neil raises from his chair, looks in Nathan’s direction before turning back to the judge.

“On the charges of fifteen account of first degree murder, the state wants for Nathan Wesninski to receive the death sentence.”

After that the jury is dismissed to deliberate on their verdict. It takes a long tense few hours, where Neil spends the majority of his time pacing the halls while Andrew watches him. Finally they are called back and the speaker of the jury stands to deliver the verdict. Andrew can feel his heart beating, blood rushing through his ears while he waits for her to speak. It’s kind of funny, he thinks, that the one to give the final verdict is a woman who would fit Nathan’s murder pattern quite well. It almost feels like the perfect revenge.

“The jury has come to a decision,” she says, then waits for the judge to prompt her to read what has been decided. “The jury has ruled in the favour of the state,” she says, before sitting down again.

“On the charges of fifteen accounts of first degree murder, the court rules in favour of the state. Nathan Wesninski will receive the death penalty,” Judge Walsh says.

Just like that, the hearing is over. The state has won, Neil has won. Nathan is taken into handcuffs, and as he walks past he turns to Andrew.

“Take good care of my son, Andrew,” he says, just soft enough that only Andrew can hear.

Andrew ignores him, just walks past him to wait for Neil. Neil collects his papers and walks Andrew’s way, where Dan immediately claps him on the back in celebration.

“Drinks?” Aaron asks.

“Drinks,” Neil agrees.

-

Andrew agrees to have the celebration of the end of The Butcher case be at his place. Even Kevin is there, and apparently Neil invited Seth because he shows up there shortly after Kevin does and all but shoves a bottle of whiskey into Andrew’s hands. Normally Andrew would have been pissed off, but he is in a good mood so he opens the whiskey and pours himself a glass. It’s one of the good brands, so Andrew decides that Seth can be forgiven and the ban from his apartment can be lifted.

From the look Neil gives him, Andrew can tell he knows he has decided to lift the permanent ban on Seth coming to the apartment. Neil smiles slyly and raises his glass to Andrew, and he knows it had been Neil’s idea for Seth to get whiskey. He can’t be too annoyed by it though, instead he allows Dan to pull him towards the door where Matt is waiting to be let in.

“Hey man, I know you don’t like-“ Matt begins, but Andrew cuts him off by simply pulling him inside.

Matt smiles and then goes off with Dan to get drunk. Andrew watches the scene for a bit, making sure everyone is enjoying themselves, before leaving to go to the roof for a smoke. He hears footsteps behind him, but doesn’t check. He already knows it’s Neil. They go up to the roof together, where Andrew had broken the lock ages ago so he could smoke up there in peace and quiet. The night is cold, and as he opens the door a gust of cold wind makes him shudder. Neil catches up and places a jacket over his shoulders. He’s already wearing his own, and smiles as he walks ahead to the edge. Andrew tugs the coat a little closer around his shoulders, then follows Neil to sit with him. He fishes out a cigarette, lights it, and immediately has it stolen by Neil. He can’t even pretend to be annoyed, so he lights another one instead and sits back to smoke.

“He never told,” Andrew says after a long silence.

“He knew it wouldn’t help his case… it would just drag it out longer.” Neil takes a deep drag of his cigarette in silence and for a long time they say nothing. Andrew places one hand down on the railing they’re sitting on, leaning back as he smokes, when Neil gently reaches for it and places his own hand over it. Andrew’s heart catches in his throat, but he forces it to relax by taking a drag from his cigarette.

“What did he say to you?” Neil finally asks.

“To take care of you.”

“Will you?”

Andrew turns to him, looking confused.

“Take care of me. I mean… Will you take care of me?”

“Yes, but not because the fucker asked me to.”

Apparently that’s the answer Neil wanted, because he moves so that he is leaning on Andrew’s shoulder. Neil let’s go of Andrew’s hand and instead Andrew wraps an arm around his shoulders. He can hear the party continuing from the open window in his apartment, can hear the laughter and chatter from his friends, and with Neil leaning against him Andrew feels like he’s home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh worm they do be in love! Stay tuned for chapter 6 where they do scandelous things like have a barbecue and kiss omg


	6. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the little epilogue that I promised! Here it is, the official end of my fic

It’s on one of their shared days off when Andrew and Neil get together with some of their friends to help Neil move back in, with the promise of a barbeque and beers as a reward. Seth and Renee are the only one who have time to help in the morning, but Kevin, Aaron, Matt and Dan agreed to come later for the barbeque. Neil really doesn’t have that many boxes that need to be moved, but he did insist Andrew get a new patio set for on the balcony and that would be a hassle to set up. Seth’s been busying himself over that for the past thirty minutes while Andrew, Neil, and Renee move boxes and unpack, and judging by the amount of swearing from the balcony, it’s not going really well.

“Neil, where do you want me to put this box?” Renee asks.

It’s a box labeled clothing. They hadn’t really discussed if Neil would be sleeping in his old room or if he and Andrew were going to share now that they knew they were soulmates. Andrew looked at Neil, who seemed to be hesitating just as much as Andrew. It wasn’t that Andrew didn’t want him in his bedroom, he had pulled Neil in there countless times already since the end of the trial, but he wasn’t sure if he could really have him stay there every night yet.

“Put it in my room,” Neil finally says, giving Andrew a reassuring smile.

Luckily Neil understands without Andrew having to tell him. Soulmates are still a relatively new thing in their world, it has only been there for barely a hundred years and there is still lots of research going on. Andrew can positively say, though, even without a degree in biology or science or whichever one you need for this, that soulmates seem to just always understand each other.

There were days where being known like this had scared Andrew, now it brings him comfort.

“Oh my fucking God,” Seth swears from the balcony, stepping into the living room a few seconds later. There is blood on his arm, and he looks absolutely done with the patio furniture. Renee goes his way to help him tend to the cut he got, while Neil scolds him for being so reckless he got hurt by a patio set.

“Oh fuck off! You just brought the worst patio set in existence!” Seth says annoyed, and it makes Andrew snort.

“I’ll do it. You can help Renee with putting up the barbeque downstairs, alright?” Neil smiles at Seth, who agrees to help Renee.

Andrew shows them which key they need to get into the storage area where Andrew keeps the barbeque and a small fridge with all the meat, beers and other things they need. They had to go out to get some extras, because fRenee had asked if Allison could come, and then Aaron had texted to ask if he could bring his girlfriend too. Apparently she was a doctor who works at the hospital Aaron used to work at and they had met through drinks with some of Aaron’s old colleagues. Aaron never explicitly stated they were soulmates, but Andrew had learnt how to read his brother over years of exposure. The coloured mark on his upper arm also didn’t really help in hiding things, though.

Andrew had bought two baguettes for the barbeque, so while Neil set to working on fixing the patio set that currently had exactly one assembled chair, courtesy of Seth, Andrew cut the baguettes. There was something strangely soothing about preparing for a barbeque with friends and family, something that Andrew thought he might grow to like. He’s halfway through cutting the first baguette, when Neil shows up and wraps his arms around Andrew. Neil is taller than Andrew only by a few inches, and he is only barely tall enough to rest his chin on Andrew’s head, yet he does it quite often. Andrew suspects he is standing on his tip toes when he does. Andrew can’t even pretend he doesn’t like it when he does it though.

“Drew?” Neil whispers.

“Mh?”

“I need your help with the patio set real quick,” Neil mutters.

Andrew puts the knife down and Neil releases him from his hold. They walk to the balcony, where Neil has already set up most of it. The only thing that hasn’t been set up yet is the couch and table. Neil gives Andrew the instructions on the couch so he can read through it, and together they set the thing up. Andrew feels… something. It’s similar to fondness, he thinks. The face Neil makes while he works is one almost similar to the face he makes when he’s in court. He’s concentrated, focused solely on getting the task done. Andrew can’t help himself, he pulls Neil away from the couch. Neil has only a second to look confused before Andrew pulls him closer and kisses him. He can feel Neil smiling and Andrew can’t quite manage to suppress a smile himself. He cups Neil’s face into his, and when they eventually part for breath, Andrew keeps his forehead pressed against Neil’s.

“We have to finish the patio set,” Neil says.

“Shhh, we have more important matters to worry about,” Andrew mumbles.

Neil huffs out a laugh, before kissing Andrew again. They get a bit carried away, and when Seth comes to look for them because everyone else is there, he finds them in the middle of making out on the couch they haven’t really fully put up yet.

“Guys?” Seth says, just as the half assembled couch gives way under the combined weight of Andrew and Neil, and drops them on the floor.

Neil looks at Seth from under Andrew, and then they both laugh. The sound of Neil’s laugh makes Andrew feel like he’s home. He feels like he’s safe, and he feels a smile fighting it’s way to his face.

“I see you two are busy, but the others are here,” Seth says with a grin.

Andrew gets up from the remnants of the couch and pulls Neil after him. Neil awkwardly dusts himself off with his hands, then turns to Seth.

“We’ll be there, we just have to finish the baguette.”

Seth hums and winks, as if baguette is some sort of dirty innuendo, then leaves while laughing. Seth isn’t half that bad when he isn’t trying to shove a fist in your face.

Andrew and Neil finish up the baguettes, then head downstairs to find Seth already cooking meat for everyone. Kevin saved a seat for Andrew and Neil next to him, so Andrew slides into the chair next to Kevin and soon everyone at the table is talking to one another. Aaron shows up not that much later, with Katelyn holding his hand as they approach. He walks to Andrew first, and asks him to follow him and Katelyn. They walk a bit away from the barbeque scene, then Aaron takes a deep breath.

“Andrew, this is Katelyn… My soulmate.”

Aaron tries to keep his voice steady but Andrew can tell he is nervous about introducing him and Katelyn. Andrew looks Katelyn up and down, she’s taller than both of them but doesn’t seem stronger. He knows he could take her in a fight if he had to, but she also seems like a genuinely nice person. There is a look of nervousness written over her face, but she is trying to hide it with a polite smile that doesn’t quite manage to be polite but rather just looks awkward. Andrew holds out his hand to her, and she takes it.

“Hurt my brother, and you’re dead,” Andrew says calmly.

Katelyn’s eyes widen and she nods, then Andrew let’s go of her hand.

“Got allergies?”

“N-No?” She looks at Aaron.

“Alright, then you can eat whatever. Come on.”

Andrew turns to head back, and only barely manages to catch Aaron saying that it went better than he expected. Andrew kind of agrees.

The barbeque lasts deep into the night, though they run out of meat way before that. Andrew made a fire and got everyone marshmallows, and now everyone is enjoying drinks around the fire, with the exception of Neil because someone who is sober should really tend to the fire and make sure the others don't fall into it. Andrew finds himself leaning against him near the end, their hands intertwined in Neil’s lap as the fire slowly dies. The embers of the fire the only thing still burning, the night's chill has begun to settle in and people are huddled up closely around the remnants of the fire. Kevin and Seth are spread out on the grass together, talking in hushed voices about who knows what. Dan seems to be fast asleep in Matt's arms, and Renee, Allison, Aaron and Katelyn are talking and cleaning up. Andrew offers to join, but Renee waves him off because he had paid for the meat and organised the barbeque. Andrew won’t argue with that logic, so he settles back with Neil in their chairs.

“Today was fun,” Neil whispers.

Andrew looks at his friends- no, his family, and feels warmth in his chest. Andrew can’t remember a time he felt like this, but after everything that happened he decides he quite likes feeling like this. Andrew turns to face Neil, and gently kisses him. Neil smiles, and Andrew feels happy. It’s a foreign concept, but he thinks he can get used to this. He decides this is something that he is allowed to have for himself. He is allowed to have a soulmate, he is allowed to have a family, to have friends, to be happy. Strangely enough he thinks of the last words Nathan said to him, when he asked Andrew to watch over Neil. He looks at Neil’s content face, looks at their intertwined hands and Neil’s soulmate mark, and he knows he’s doing just fine. No one will ever know the truth that Andrew knows, but that’s alright. Nathan is in the past, and Andrew and Neil are heading for the future.

Andrew just can’t wait to see what his future with Neil has in store for him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy fuck, okay, this is the biggest fanfic I have ever written and my first time joining any sort of fandom event. I just want to say thank you to the amazing mods of the BB, to Sam the amazing artist who helped me bring my story to life with the gorgeous art they made, my amazing grammar gals who beta'd my fic for me, to my friends who hyped me on the entire time and to you, the person reading this. Seeing your kind comments really made me happy and I was so excited to share this with y'all. (I am a sappy person, in case you haven't noticed haha.)
> 
> Seriously though, I hope you enjoyed reading this fic as much as I enjoyed writing it. Come say hi to me on my [tumblr](https://eloquent-apollo.tumblr.com/)  
> , if you want? I will be back with more stories, but this is a wrap on Metanoia oof!!


End file.
